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Dem Wants to Ban Bullet-Proof Glass [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 12 December 2021 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/15/2021 10:18:28 AM PST by John Semmens

Philadelphia Councilwoman Cindy Bass wants to outlaw bullet-proof glass in retail stores because it "encourages loitering, public urination and potential drug sales." Her rationale seems weak. Store owners install bullet-proof glass to protect themselves from armed robbers.

Bass argues that "this glass is an indignity for everyone who enters the store. It conveys the message that anyone could be a thief. For every armed robber who is thwarted hundreds of honest people are so psychologically damaged that they can't help themselves from urinating in the street, idly loitering in the area, and make drug deals."

Bass went on to complain that "bullet-proof glass also impedes hammer-wielding activists from expressing their dissatisfaction with the current distribution of wealth in this country. Instead of being able to quickly smash ordinary glass to get at the merchandise they are pretty much forced to go elsewhere in search of a softer target. This unnecessarily blocks an innovative strategy for achieving social justice."

In related news, Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot says "retailers have only themselves to blame for the explosion in 'smash-and-grab' thefts. Putting valuable merchandise in flimsy glass display cases unnecessarily tempts those less well off folks to steal." Her recommendation is to "one, choose a different product to sell because bulkier low-priced items are less tempting. Two, hire social workers to intercept looters and help them to qualify for welfare benefits. Or three, relocate your business to a safer area outside of the City or State."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php?topic=455676.0


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: bidenvoters; crime; democrats; looting; satire

1 posted on 12/15/2021 10:18:28 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

It is a deterrent to smash and loot, and that’s racist.


2 posted on 12/15/2021 10:20:43 AM PST by BBQToadRibs2
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To: John Semmens

One reason I want a Cybertruck is the nominally bulletproof steel & glass. (Ain’t great, but way better than any alternative I can afford.)


3 posted on 12/15/2021 10:22:38 AM PST by ctdonath2 (Statistics don't matter when they happen to you.)
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To: John Semmens

The problem with many of these satire articles is that they’re too easy to believe.


4 posted on 12/15/2021 10:24:24 AM PST by GMMC0987
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To: ctdonath2

I’d love a SA made Marauder I saw on Top Gear a few years ago.

Seeing Richard Hammond squeeze in that driver’s compartment would discourage 6’3 me from trying.

They’re kind of pricey too but a great town car.


5 posted on 12/15/2021 10:25:31 AM PST by wally_bert (I cannot be sure for certain, but in my personal opinion I am certain that I am not sure.)
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Bullet proof glass is racist. Store owners spend tens of thousands of dollars on it for their markets not because of personal safety reasons but solely because they know it antagonizes teens


6 posted on 12/15/2021 10:27:18 AM PST by dsrtsage ( Complexity is just simple lacking imagination)
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To: John Semmens
Semi-satire or not...I say, if they want tho ban it in for store fronts then ban it in all government owned limousines.

But the way things are going around the country...they're gonna need it.

7 posted on 12/15/2021 10:28:20 AM PST by Bloody Sam Roberts (Imagine, if you will, a vaccine so safe you have to be threatened to take it. )
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To: John Semmens

Anyone psychologically damaged by an inability to break glass is too dumb to live.
Perhaps someone ought to mention to this sensitive “leader” that the reason the folks are offended by this practice is that PlannedParenthood was not operating effectively in their neighborhood just prior to their birth. Perhaps she ought to give PP more $$$$ so that the next generation can be totally eliminated — since that is the goal of PP.


8 posted on 12/15/2021 12:58:16 PM PST by bobbo666 (Baizuo)
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To: John Semmens

This actually happened back in 2017! Ther is no. “semi-satire” here just old news.


9 posted on 12/15/2021 2:05:28 PM PST by outofsalt (If history teaches us anything, it's that history rarely teaches anything.)
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