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Schiff Calls for Criminal Contempt Charges [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 September 2021 | John Semmens

Posted on 09/25/2021 1:39:16 AM PDT by John Semmens

Professing himself "gravely disappointed by the lack of any serious charges against the January 6 insurrectionists," the head of the House Intelligence Committee Rep. Adam Schiff (D-Calif) is now calling for "criminal contempt charges to be lodged against all of the participants who refuse to confess."

"The nation needs to heal," Schiff contended. "For that to happen we need to punish those who so nearly overthrew the duly elected new president. While hard evidence is scarce, the behavior of those currently jailed awaiting trial can only be described as obstruction of justice. They all know they are guilty of treason. If they had any decency they would admit it, accept their punishment, and put the nation on the road to total unity."

"Ideally, the Department of Justice would levy the charges against these miscreants," Schiff argued. "Though criminal contempt is not a hanging offense, it can still sting. General Flynn's career was wrecked by a similar charge when he obstructed the FBI's efforts to oust President Trump for defeating Secretary Clinton in the 2016 election. If the DOJ won't do its duty, Congress could deploy the rarely used Bill of Attainder and legislate an appropriate punishment on each and every one one of these Trump henchmen."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,449306.new.html#new


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: adamschiff; california; democrats; injustice; satire; scaredschiffless; schiffforbrains; schiffless; trump; tyranny

1 posted on 09/25/2021 1:39:16 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 21twelve; 1raider1; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 3D-JOY; 43north; ...

ping


2 posted on 09/25/2021 1:40:53 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

This probably isn’t satire. These rat 🐀 bastards really would do this if they thought they could get away with it.


3 posted on 09/25/2021 2:56:22 AM PDT by Mark17 (USAF ATCer, Retired. Father of USAF pilot. ATCers & pilots, the quintessential elements of aviation)
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To: Mark17

Shift is capable of anything.


4 posted on 09/25/2021 3:14:05 AM PDT by bobbo666 (Baizuo)
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To: John Semmens

Hitching a ride on your thread JS:)
...........................................................

A fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up - fireman, mechanic, businessman, car salesman... and so forth.

However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied, “My father’s an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes to music in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money.”

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and took little Justin aside. “Is that really true about your father?”

“No,” the boy said, “He works for the Democratic National Committee and helped to get Biden elected, but it’s too embarrassing to say that in front of the other kids.”


5 posted on 09/25/2021 3:16:14 AM PDT by sodpoodle (Life is prickly, carry tweezers.)
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To: bobbo666
Shift is capable of anything.

Yes, a total scum bag, and I don’t mean to insult bags, containing scum.

6 posted on 09/25/2021 3:24:00 AM PDT by Mark17 (USAF ATCer, Retired. Father of USAF pilot. ATCers & pilots, the quintessential elements of aviation)
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To: sodpoodle
“No,” the boy said, “He works for the Democratic National Committee and helped to get Biden elected, but it’s too embarrassing to say that in front of the other kids.”

Now that, is funny, and probably not satire either.

7 posted on 09/25/2021 3:27:12 AM PDT by Mark17 (USAF ATCer, Retired. Father of USAF pilot. ATCers & pilots, the quintessential elements of aviation)
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To: John Semmens

The Nation will heal as soon as Schiffty is retired.


8 posted on 09/25/2021 4:50:17 AM PDT by chopperk
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To: Mark17; John Semmens

Most of what John does isn’t really satire. He’s just filling in the blanks of what they’re really thinking.


9 posted on 09/25/2021 5:16:12 AM PDT by Hardastarboard (Don't wish your enemy ill; plan it. )
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To: John Semmens

The Republicans in Congress are about to LEARN A LESSON in how to play hardball, and they deserve it.


10 posted on 09/25/2021 5:31:27 AM PDT by BobL (I shop at Walmart and eat at McDonald's, I just don't tell anyone, like most here.)
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To: Hardastarboard

👍


11 posted on 09/25/2021 6:16:46 AM PDT by Mark17 (USAF ATCer, Retired. Father of USAF pilot. ATCers & pilots, the quintessential elements of aviation)
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To: John Semmens
...the rarely used Bill of Attainder...

They could also pass an Ex Post Facto law which makes it (retroactively) illegal for Republicans to demonstrate in Washington, DC.

12 posted on 09/25/2021 9:32:42 AM PDT by sima_yi ( Reporting live from the far North)
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