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Vax Mandate to Pare Police Force [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 29 August 2021 | John Semmens

Posted on 08/28/2021 11:04:09 AM PDT by John Semmens

Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot’s mandate requiring all city officers to get the COVID-19 vaccine has been met with defiance by John Catanzara, president of the Chicago Fraternal Order of Police. “This vaccine has no studies for long-term side effects or consequences. None,” Catanzara said. “To mandate anybody to get that vaccine, without that data as a baseline, among other issues, is a ‘Hell, no’ for us.”

Lightfoot insisted that “no one will be exempt. City employees are absolutely going to be required to be vaccinated. Anyone not vaccinated by October 15 will be terminated. If that means we have no police department, so be it. A lot of people have been advising me that we should replace our police with social workers anyway. At the very least, we will dramatically reduce the incidence of police shooting black men in our city.”

Unfortunately, the vast majority of black men who get shot in Chicago are shot by other black men. A shrunken or dismantled police department is more likely to worsen this violence. Nonetheless, Lightfoot is adamant that “the COVID death toll for the unvaccinated will be much larger. This toll will be levied on millions of innocent victims. Stopping such a calamity is far more important than continuing the futile effort to stop black-on-black violence. If refusal to get vaccinated leads to us having fewer police on our streets, I can live with that.”

In related news, Guns Down America, March For Our Lives, Newtown Action Alliance, and Survivors Empowered are lobbying President Biden to set up an “Office of Gun Violence Prevention.” Zeenat Yahya, spokeswoman for March For Our Lives, complained that “the president promised bold action over and over again. When he wants to get things done, he does it. Look at how quickly he has brought the Afghanistan war to a successful end. He can do the same thing to end gun violence in America by simply confiscating all the guns in private hands like the Taliban did in Afghanistan.”

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://libertyusa21.wordpress.com/semi-news-semi-satire/


TOPICS: Government; Health/Medicine; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: chicago; covid; crime; guns; police; race; satire; vaccines

1 posted on 08/28/2021 11:04:09 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Hmmm. So union folks can slide? Gotta join ROFOA I guess. Retired Old Farts Of America.


2 posted on 08/28/2021 11:08:14 AM PDT by rktman (Destroy America from within? Check! WTH? Enlisted USN 1967 to end up with this? 😕)
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To: John Semmens

There’s essentially no difference between your articles and reality.


3 posted on 08/28/2021 11:11:45 AM PDT by EEGator
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To: John Semmens

Did Lady Lori take the jab and that is what disfigured her, looking like some creature from a lagoon?


4 posted on 08/28/2021 12:09:35 PM PDT by Mark (Celebrities... is there anything they do not know? Homer Simpson)
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