100 Million Vaccine-Hesitant Americans Will Get The Shot Now That A Government Agency Said It’s OK

Babylon Bee ^ | 08/23/2021 | Babylon Bee

[DFG]

U.S.—100 million Americans who were previously hesitant to get vaccinated are rejoicing today after the FDA approved it, proving that everything is totally safe.

According to sources, the Food and Drug Administration is completely trustworthy and has never approved harmful drugs for the public before. Those sources further confirmed that the FDA is a part of the government, which has never lied or been incompetent or corrupt in any way.

"Yeah, I've always trusted the government and drug companies, so I guess I'm ok to get the vaccine now," said Bubba Snugglebrugg, who was previously a militant anti-vaxxer. "I can't wait to get my 'Fauci Ouchie' and wear my Pfizer sticker! Thanks, FDA!"

Sources within the FDA say the vaccine went through a rigorous approval process of various government bureaucrats saying "Oh well, what the heck—we may as well approve this now", and signing a very important-looking document with a government seal and some big words on it.

"That's good enough for me!" said Snugglebrugg.

[Bobalu]

If the government told you to jump off a bridge..

I'll never fall for that one again!

Got a huge fine for disturbing a scenic riverway :-/

[metmom]

Interesting article.

It gives the stats then spends a lot of time on damage control as to why people should get it anyways.

[P-Marlowe]

It’s the Babylon Bee. 🐝

[metmom]

I meant the link in post 37, although I do have to admit that on occasion the Bee does get me.

[ExSafecracker]

I thought I was the only one to remember that deal(Thalidomide). If I remember it wasn’t a vax, but an approved sleep aid for pregnant women. Some who took it had grossly malformed babies.