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Liberal Feels Sad For Man Dying Of COVID, Then Happy After Hearing He Wasn’t Vaccinated, Then Sad Again Because He Was An Illegal Immigrant
Babylon Bee ^ | 07/28/2021 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 07/28/2021 12:54:40 PM PDT by DFG

GRAND RAPIDS, MI—Local compassionate progressive Karter Brynlee is recovering from an emotional roller coaster today after initially feeling sad for someone dying of COVID, then feeling a perverse thrill after finding out the victim hadn't been responsible enough to get vaccinated, then sad again after realizing he was an illegal immigrant who had snuck across the border.

"Oh, how sad," said Brynlee to himself, quickly followed by "HA! IN YOUR FACE YOU STUPID ANTI-VAX BOOMER!", which was quickly followed by "Oh man... what a tragedy."

"I am very compassionate," Brynlee then said to himself.

According to sources, tens of thousands of unvaccinated undocumented immigrants are being released into the country. Experts say this is totally fine and nothing to worry about. According to Dr. Fauci, the problem should be solved if we make 2-year-olds wear masks.

"That seems like the compassionate thing to do," Brynlee added.

As Brynlee continued to read the news, his sadness turned to joy once again when he found out that the illegal immigrant was an anti-communist refugee from Cuba.

"Eh—I guess the dummy should have stayed in Cuba where they have the best healthcare," he said smugly. "Did I mention how compassionate I am?"


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; covid; cuba; mask; vax

1 posted on 07/28/2021 12:54:40 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

0
When did the bee start reporting the truth?


2 posted on 07/28/2021 12:55:43 PM PDT by cableguymn (We need a redneck in the white house.... But the fact checkers said the story was false!)
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To: DFG

So spot-on it isn’t even funny!


3 posted on 07/28/2021 1:03:03 PM PDT by Wilhelm Tell (True or False? This is not a tag line.)
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To: DFG
LOL! Ends with Cuba!
4 posted on 07/28/2021 1:08:34 PM PDT by 4Liberty (Honest GOP can't use legal means because Dems use illegal ones (threats). The Robert Creamer Party! )
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To: DFG; lightman

A bit of Orthodox Christian satirical humor, too:

https://theoniondome.com


5 posted on 07/28/2021 1:10:18 PM PDT by Honorary Serb (Kosovo is Serbia! Free Srpska! Abolish ICTY!)
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To: DFG
"I am very compassionate," Brynlee then said to himself.

Perfect.

6 posted on 07/28/2021 1:28:45 PM PDT by Tax-chick (I found that yelling at my screen did not effect the change I sought.)
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To: Honorary Serb
That actually went right over my head.   Perhaps there are some Eastern Cabalist turns that I was not able to understand.
7 posted on 07/28/2021 1:48:21 PM PDT by higgmeister ( In the Shadow of The Big Chicken )
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To: higgmeister

If you look up the equivalent entries on a “straight” Orthodox website like oca.org, you should understand most of the Onion Dome!

And the Orthodox Church is anti-Cabalism!!!!


8 posted on 07/28/2021 1:54:35 PM PDT by Honorary Serb (Kosovo is Serbia! Free Srpska! Abolish ICTY!)
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To: cableguymn

I think they are more accurate than the MSM these days.


9 posted on 07/28/2021 2:08:01 PM PDT by wgmalabama (We will find out if the Vac or virus risk was the correct choice - can we put truth above narrative?)
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To: Honorary Serb
Of course the Orthodox Church is anti-Cabalism, but your link started with the person Melania the Younger (ca. 383–439).   Heretics and kabbalist text were known from back then, so I suspected I must have been missing something mystical with the story.

I went on the site oca.org and searched for "Melania the Younger" and nothing came up.   I still don't understand.

10 posted on 07/28/2021 2:34:16 PM PDT by higgmeister ( In the Shadow of The Big Chicken )
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To: higgmeister

https://www.oca.org/saints/lives/2021/12/31/103701-venerable-melania-the-younger-of-rome

Just look up “Melania” under the Lives of the Saints.


11 posted on 07/28/2021 2:54:47 PM PDT by Honorary Serb (Kosovo is Serbia! Free Srpska! Abolish ICTY!)
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To: Honorary Serb
Thanks for the explanation.   Now I see what the Onion Dome attempted to do, but putting some sort of shade on the Venerable Saints of our early Church before The Great Schism is out of bounds as far as I'm concerned.

A high school classmate of mine had a brother who was a well venerated Eastern Orthodox Church Priest.   My classmate used the Greek spelling of his own name on Facebook.   He took it rather hard when his brother died, but of course for his own personal loss.

12 posted on 07/28/2021 5:17:09 PM PDT by higgmeister ( In the Shadow of The Big Chicken )
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To: DFG

Babylon Bee, like a new mad magazine, hilarious stuff but often spot on.


13 posted on 07/28/2021 8:33:58 PM PDT by vespa300
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To: DFG; 100American; al baby; Allegra; BufordP; dp0622; DoodleBob; EveningStar; Gefn; GunsareOK; ...

DANG!


14 posted on 08/01/2021 12:40:54 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (Florida: America's new free zone.)
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