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7 Clever Ways To Scare Off Biden's Door-To-Door Vaccine Evangelists
Babylon Bee ^ | 07/08/2021 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 07/08/2021 2:44:36 PM PDT by DFG

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To: DFG

Open the door and greet them like Jack Nicholson in the Shinning.


41 posted on 07/08/2021 3:42:02 PM PDT by JaguarXKE (Liberalism is a cancer on our nation.)
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To: cpdiii

Same here; my folks live up a dirt road a mile plus from the main highway. Anyone comes at that time of night has to have passed a couple of other houses. Our road is well marked as private and there are no lights.


42 posted on 07/08/2021 3:43:01 PM PDT by SkyDancer (I Identify As Vaccinated)
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To: DFG

Answer the door. Tell them to hold on for a minute because you have something on the stove. Close the door and go about your business. Check back an hour or so later to see if they are still standing there.


43 posted on 07/08/2021 3:46:15 PM PDT by RetiredTexasVet (Corrupt Slow Joe Biden is the Bolshevik sock puppet.)
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To: Rusty0604

I think that will be easy. I’ll probably be the only house on the street that they stop at. :)


44 posted on 07/08/2021 3:48:38 PM PDT by Beach333 ( )
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To: glennaro

LOL, you win Post of the Day!


45 posted on 07/08/2021 3:51:54 PM PDT by Kalamata (BIBLE RESEARCH TOOLS: http://bibleresearchtools.com/)
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To: DFG

“Hi Friend, do you know Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior..? ....where you going ma’am?”


46 posted on 07/08/2021 3:52:13 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: BullwinkleMoose

Nah, these people like that kind of stuff.


47 posted on 07/08/2021 3:53:14 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: cpdiii

Dont ever open the door.


48 posted on 07/08/2021 3:55:25 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: Secret Agent Man

Basically the good rule is, if you are not expecting someone, never open the door.


49 posted on 07/08/2021 3:58:39 PM PDT by Secret Agent Man (Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
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To: Salamander

Yell “Don’t worry. They’ve had their shots!” and close the door.


50 posted on 07/08/2021 4:12:23 PM PDT by gundog (It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
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To: SgtHooper

If ‘they’ cross through my locked gate and ignore the ‘Posted’ signs I’ll be greeting them with a loaded weapon. They’ve already broken state law.


51 posted on 07/08/2021 4:12:36 PM PDT by GreyHoundSailor
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To: DFG

If the door isn’t answered they will probably keep coming back like census takers.


52 posted on 07/08/2021 4:17:58 PM PDT by SaxxonWoods ( comment might be sarcasm, or not. It depends. Often I'm not sure either.)
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To: Rusty0604

My doc literally prescribes those on my “extended prescription list,” which makes them deductible. He uses WebMD as a source to verify the usefulness of everything I ask for. Only said no once. Can’t your doc do that too? It’s perfectly legal.


53 posted on 07/08/2021 4:18:07 PM PDT by Veto! (Political Correctness Offends Me)
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To: glennaro

Winner!! Making mine tomorrow.


54 posted on 07/08/2021 4:18:38 PM PDT by momincombatboots (Ephesians 6... who you are really at war with)
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To: SkyDancer

Also has better range.


55 posted on 07/08/2021 4:19:40 PM PDT by Nebr FAL owner (Treason is the reason for Democrat Sedition & Subversion)
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To: DFG

if they show up here i will ask if they are doctors. Giving medical advice without a license. and read them their miranda rights.


56 posted on 07/08/2021 4:22:11 PM PDT by kvanbrunt2
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To: Nebr FAL owner

Yeah, well, just showing it would make those snowflakes melt right there on the porch.


57 posted on 07/08/2021 4:23:53 PM PDT by SkyDancer (I Identify As Vaccinated)
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To: DFG

ROFLOL


58 posted on 07/08/2021 4:26:13 PM PDT by petitfour (APPEAL TO HEAVEN)
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To: DFG

Fortunately, I’m fluent in non-existing languages which usually works for phone calls also. So “riqar mikou” (I welcome a visit).


59 posted on 07/08/2021 4:31:07 PM PDT by LeoTDB69
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To: DFG

This is funny - as it is good satire...

However, this door to door business... they’re not fooling around.

Your dog gets aggressive and hours later, animal control will come to collect it. And fine YOU.

They see any firearms, expect a visit from the ATF or something like that the next few days...

Speak aggressively to them and your name goes on the “list”. Expect your life to become somewhat ... difficult thereafter.

Again, this isn’t what they say it is, folks.


60 posted on 07/08/2021 4:33:09 PM PDT by joethedrummer
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