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Biden Says Trump "Will Try to Steal this Election" [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 14 June 2020 | John Semmens

Posted on 06/16/2020 10:13:44 AM PDT by John Semmens

Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden told Comedy Central's Trevor Noah that "there's not a doubt about it, Trump will try to steal this year's election. Look, we all know he did it in 2016. October polls showed him behind by double digits and the Billy Bush tape should've been the knock out blow. But a few weeks later to everyone's surprise, he was declared the winner."

"Since he got away with conspiring with the Russians I expect him to do it again," Biden alleged. "Rep. Schiff had hard evidence, but the Republicans in the Senate refused to convict Trump after he was impeached. On top of this, Trump is pushing to disqualify as many votes as he can by insisting on voter IDs and injecting unwanted scrutiny of ballot harvesting into the equation. Voting is a human right and shouldn't be limited to only citizens and a single ballot per person. Non-citizens should have a say in who governs them. And many Democrats are too decrepit or lazy to go to the polls. They should be allowed to sell their proxy to others so their votes won't be lost."

Biden went on to warn that "our military may have to remove Trump from office in order to protect democracy. All of us have seen the many retired generals who are expressing concern speak out against Trump. They may have to intervene to forestall another incorrect outcome at the polls."

In related news, Biden has reportedly shortened his list of prospective running mates, but former Georgia gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams is not on it. "I have been waiting by the phone for weeks to hear from Joe," she lamented. "I wondered, could he have forgotten my number?" A spokesman for the Biden campaigned assured that "we have Gov. Abrams' phone number, but when her state prematurely broke ranks with all the other Democratic governors by easing the lockdown early it made the rest of them look bad. She had to have realized that this disloyalty to the Party would hurt her VP chances."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,405170.new.html#new


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: abrams; biden; russia; satire; trump

1 posted on 06/16/2020 10:13:44 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

Projection...


2 posted on 06/16/2020 10:23:03 AM PDT by JimRed (TERM LIMITS, NOW! Build the Wall Faster! TRUTH is the new HATE SPEECH.)
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To: John Semmens

Satire won’t work well in this campaign. The left takes positions that could be construed as either extremism, parody, or satire. It is often impossible to discern between them.


3 posted on 06/16/2020 10:35:28 AM PDT by SERKIT ("Blazing Saddles" explains it all.......)
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To: John Semmens

Trump needs to make it clear unless it’s free and fair he will not accept the results. This will keep them “honest”. They need to fear consequences.


4 posted on 06/16/2020 10:52:51 AM PDT by wiseprince
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To: John Semmens

Biden Will Try to Steal this Election


5 posted on 06/16/2020 11:12:00 AM PDT by TBP (Progressives lack compassion and tolerance. Their self-aggrandizement is all that matters.)
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To: John Semmens
We have had three years where Democrat party efforts to steal, subvert or overturn an election have been at the fore.

The democratic party is evidently corrupt and mendacious.

6 posted on 06/16/2020 11:28:36 AM PDT by AndyJackson
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.

Trump should announce a DEATH PENALTY for those committing VOTER FRAUD.

Time to thwart the leftists.

.


7 posted on 06/16/2020 11:30:58 AM PDT by elbook
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