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House Will Not Return to DC [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 3 May 2020 | John Semmens

Posted on 05/05/2020 1:29:48 PM PDT by John Semmens

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) has decided "against returning to Washington for the foreseeable future. With so many of our members being in the decrepit geezers cohort of the population, it's just too dangerous. We're going to follow Dr. Fauci's advice and shelter at home until a COVID vaccine is developed."

The Speaker hastened to reassure concerned citizens "not to worry about us. We'll be okay. As essential government workers our full salaries continue to be paid. So even the poorest among us will be able to survive for the duration. On top of this, we'll be saving taxpayers the cost of paying for our travel back-and-forth from our districts to the capital."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php?topic=400421.0


TOPICS: Government; Health/Medicine; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: congress; essentialworkers; pelosi; satire

1 posted on 05/05/2020 1:29:48 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

NO SHOW==NO PAY


2 posted on 05/05/2020 1:37:00 PM PDT by CMailBag
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To: John Semmens

Then they can’t do any harm. No one’s life or livelihood is safe when Congress is in session.


3 posted on 05/05/2020 1:39:41 PM PDT by PLMerite ("They say that we were Cold Warriors. Yes, and a bloody good show, too." - Robert Conquest)
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To: John Semmens

I expect Pelousi to try and move the House of Representatives to California and try to set up an “alternative” government now that all of her other coup attempts have failed.


4 posted on 05/05/2020 1:43:56 PM PDT by .44 Special (Tiamid Buacach!)
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To: John Semmens

I’m just glad we’re not getting all the government we’re paying for.


5 posted on 05/05/2020 3:16:29 PM PDT by IAGeezer912 (One out of every 20 people on the face of the earth are Americans. We have won life's lottery.)
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To: John Semmens

And they’ll be supporting essential local gourmet ice-cream businesses.


6 posted on 05/05/2020 3:21:43 PM PDT by rfp1234 (Caveat Emperor)
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