Pelosi Irked by Impeachment Pressure [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 9 June 2019 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

Distressed at what she characterized as "unforgivable incompetence at the FBI," House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) sought to fend off what she considers "unwise and impetuous demands for Trump's impeachment," by assuring the Democratic caucus that she too "wants to see Trump in prison."

"I wish I could just snap my fingers and make it happen," she told colleagues, "but there are too many barriers between what I'd like to do and what I can do. The FBI and Director Comey let us down big time. The Agency has been able to put countless people behind bars over the years—planting evidence, suborning perjury, and coercing admissions of guilt—or shooting them if that's what it takes. With all the resources at their disposal it is unconscionable that they allowed Trump to slip through the noose."

While sympathetic to the Speaker's dilemma, House Judiciary Chairman Jerry Nadler (D-NY) still advocated for impeachment hearings. "What I think Nancy is overlooking is the opportunity to use such hearings to stoke the fires of the type of voter indignation necessary to give our GOP colleagues the nerve to side with us in achieving his ouster," Nadler maintained. "Unlike court proceedings, House hearings are not bound by rules of evidence. Accusations are unconstrained by the kinds of limits a judge might impose at a trial. Lurid and unsubstantiated charges launched by Democrats at these hearings will be passed on via the media. It is our only chance to raise the level of disgust high enough to turn the majority of voters against Trump."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,364435.0.html