Skip to comments.The Assassination of Ronald Jump—Candidate—A Cautionary Tale….
Posted on 08/07/2015 1:06:20 PM PDT by Reverend Saltine
The President of the United States winced as he watched the huge, retreating backside of the First Lady exiting the Oval Office like a heaving cargo galleon under full sail.
The President spoke to his front office, "Is she gone?"
"Yes, Mr. President."
President Bara O'Hara finally sat back and relaxed in his chair, ignoring the pile of food and accouterments left before him by his wife.
Free of her food surveillance, he pulled open the lower right drawer of his massive desk, a gift from Queen Victoria to President Hayes in 1880, where he'd hidden the Bacon & Cheese Sirloin Third Pound Burger Meal he'd been eating, when the First Lady had unexpectedly shown up.
He'd just managed to hide the contraband, high-fat, high-calorie feast when she'd sailed through the door bearing a steamed tufu salad and soy crackers she'd insisted he eat for lunch. She'd been accompanied by an enforcement armada structured from three of her 92 aides, her starched-in-the-wool mother, and the White House chef, all brandishing 17th Century Ming porcelain plates, Habsburg Empire silverware, and an assortment of imported, "organic" Tibetan teas, and cheeses. The crowning touch had been the meilleurs vinaigrettes du Sud de France, dressings for the salad, flown in this morning from the chef's home town by military jet.
President O'Hara bit into the third pound burger, ignoring sauce that dripped onto his thumbs---just as National Security Advisor, Bob Steele, exited the hidden security room that adjoined the Office.
"Hi Bob," the President said, his mouth full, "glad you're back. Now finish up that story you were relating when we were ambushed by Rochelle's horse hips and posse, back there." He tried to smile at his own joke regarding his wife, but it didn't work with all that burger, bacon, and cheese stuffed behind his large teeth.
Bob Steele glanced around; he held the door in his intent gaze for a moment, and then took a seat opposite the President. He knew this room had been secured from bugs and cameras because his staff had just swept it before Rochelle had intruded. He'd watched carefully to make certain no one in her entourage had "left anything" behind. Steele noted the sauce running down O'Hara's chin. He always noted anything that moved. Or that stayed still.
Steele's personal guards piled in and cleared away everything Rochelle had brought in with here.
President O'Hara raised a questioning eyebrow toward Steele.
Steele said, "They're clearing it all away before we talk," he waved a dismissive hand, "just as a security precaution...bugs, and such." He didn't bother going into detail; he knew O'Hara wouldn't care.
"Mmmff," O'Hara made an affirming sound from his stuffed mouth, and gestured at Steele with the huge burger, "mff, go ahead, Bob."
Steele glanced at his fake iPhone and comfirmed there was no electromagnetic signal in the room. He activated its white noise and radiation generator to mask what he was about to say to the President of the United States.
"Mr. President, our own internal polling confirms that this guy Ronald Jump is like a runaway freight train full of happy voters; I'm afraid there's no way to stop him from kicking our ass in the election." He paused.
Then Steele looked intently into O'Hara's eyes and added, "Not politically. Stop him, I mean."
Bara O'Hara stopped eating, wiped his hands on damask, and sat back. His face was a practiced, blank mask, but it told the experienced Steele to continue.
"And Mr. President, you remember when Ronald Jump threatened to 'kick his ass'---the escaped drug lord---EL Gigante?" It wasn't really a question.
Steele went on without stopping, "And then EL Gigante threatened The Ronald with death unless he dropped the invective?"
Bob Steele sat back and interlaced his fingers comfortably on the pressed vest of his three-piece suit.
President O'Hara stayed silent.
Steele went on, "Well...there are those who say---and I don't know if this is true, or who's saying it, of course---that EL Gigante is still plenty pissed off at the Ronald. They say Gigante's people could barely keep him from killing the Ronald that time. They say it wouldn't take much to send Gigante over the top---to have The Ronald...uh...neutralized." He smiled.
O'Hara remained silent, but lifted his chin a centimeter at Bob Steele.
The national Security Advisor gazed at the ceiling, and said, "Anyways...."
He lowered his eyes onto the President and went on, "...it also seems there's a story circulating---or maybe it's about to circulate, I dont know---a story that would give EL Gigante that final push.
"This is supposedly a story that says---and I don't know anything more about this---it says that The Ronald has put out his own contract to hit Gigante and kill him dead, before The Ronald himself could be hit by El Gigante." Steele shrugged. "Like I said, it seems to be rumor or fantasy, probably what we call a 'legend,' or false flag in the biz. I mean, who knows?
"Anyway, Mr President, that could conceivably---and unfortunately, of course---remove Ronald Jump from the running, one way or another. I mean, if anybody were to, shall we say, let that story out...."
President O'Hara gazed at the desktop for a moment. He darted his tongue once to swipe his lips clean of meat and sauce.
He raised colorless eyes to look at Bob Steele, and smiled.
National Security Advisor, Bob Steele, unclasped his intertwined fingers. He rose from his seat. He pulled his vest down tight.
He walked toward the heavy, Romanesque door, thinking about what came next.
A Cautionary Tale :)
More likely a conversation between Mrs. Clinton and Mrs. Danger. And I won’t to speculate on what was dripping off the former’s chin, but it wasn’t from a burger.
(Mrs. Danger-—that’s funny. Where the hell is Carlos these days anyway? Yemen?)
He walked back to the golf ball, took aim, smoothy pushing the ball towards the glass and neatly missing it by several inches. it was then the north door opened as the President's secretary ushered in______________to be continued..... next.....
Bass Fishing League?
Are you inviting me to a fish fry?
...and he did it all...unerringly....
wow! i think you got it!!!
don’t try this at home alone....
Hey, you have a great story....keep it going...
thanks, i try to do one a day; it’sd just a short-story, not really serious or i would not have pointed out what totally dangerous fools the “president and first Lady” seem to be :)
Let’s go fishin!
LOLOL! it means, “bump for later.”
and bump for later means...?
(”bump for later????)
If we want to put a thread to the top of the reading list of the forum, to renew its activity, we will call it “bump to the top,” or btt. Generally it is a statement of ratification of the thread being worthwhile.
Sometimes, if a thread sounds interesting, but there is no time to read it at the moment, it is handy for some people to mark a thread “bump for later.” (bfl) That way you can find it later and see in your personal “ping” message list that you had marked it as being of interest to read. It also places a thread to the top, but you are not necessarily giving it your firm approval.
I hope this helps! (We can all do a fish fry later!! LOL!)
Thank you Wise One.
I am not yet accustomed to your esoteric ways here :)
The journey here has taxed me; it has taxed me deeply. It turns me round and round, like yon windlass....
but, serially-—thank kew :)
i love fish and chips :)
LOL! you are most welcome, Reverend Saltine!
You are not exactly a newby, but it can take a while to figure our what people are talking about here sometimes! I’m STILL asking for clarification on stuff from time to time!
I like fish and chips too! ;-D
i confess i have not really delved the esoteria of Freep. If i have a question I go to my two Sensei; is that a right thing “two sensei”? What is the plural of Sensei? What is the sound of one Sensei clapping? :)
Thanks again for your help, Oh TEXOKIE (an Okie from Texas, or vicie versie)....
LOL! I don’t have a clue about the plural form of Sensei!
You are very welcome for any help I am able to give about the “esoteria of Freep” I don’t know it all, but I know some! :-D
could be “Senseironi”?
thanks i had already planned to pester you. I’ll send you a note, to make sure i have your address, okaY
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