Posted on 10/13/2014 9:14:25 AM PDT by John Semmens
In what some project to be the opening gambit of a potential 2016 presidential campaign, Maryland’s Governor Martin O’Malley (D) declared that access to WiFi is a human right.
“I’m not saying that people should merely be free to purchase and use WiFi at their own expense,” O’Malley clarified. “Doing what you please and paying for it out of your own pocket is an archaic conception of basic human rights. It may have been fine for our nation’s Founding Fathers because they didn’t know any better. Fortunately, we’ve made significant advances in our thinking since then.”
A key phrase that O’Malley thinks ought to guide modern thinking is one that appears in the standard “Miranda warning” that police give to arrestees regarding their right to an attorney: “if you cannot afford one, one will be provided for you at government expense.”
“People can’t really be said to be free if their resources are insufficient to fulfill their needs,” O’Malley contended. “WiFi has become such an ingrained part of modern life that everyone must be entitled to participate. After all, man does not live by bread alone. If we can justify feeding, clothing, and housing the poor how can we draw a line that bars them from enjoying the abundance available to their better off peers?”
Senator Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass), a projected rival for the 2016 Democratic presidential nomination called O’Malley’s declaration “an interesting opening to a whole new philosophy of freedom in this country. My only criticism is that we must go further than just universal free WiFi. No person in America should have to go without anything that anyone else has merely because of insufficient funds. We must evolve out of the anarchic individualized distribution of wealth in this country toward one where government plays the main role in guaranteeing a more equal allocation to all.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://azconservative.org/2014/10/11/former-obama-press-secretary-says-gop-unfairly-exploiting-administrations-failures/
I am treading lightly...which part is semi news? Did one of these clowns actually say what is quoted? Because, boy, it sounds like them.
You just watch; some LIEberal is absolutely going to say this Real Soon Now!
It is going to happen. You watch.
It is just a matter of time. The sad thing is that internet access is becoming necessary to transact almost any type of business these days. Hiring people to answer telephones, staff service windows, or process payments, is so - so 1980ish.
I demand free gym memberships and salon visits.
Yeah. And why should you have to ride the bus while others drive monster SUVs or Lincolns. If you want the same kind of luxury vehicle that someone else has the gov’t ought to give you one.
It’s all pretty much all old news. There’s a movement calling for Internet access as a basic human right, and wired connections being more limited than wireless they think free WiFi (and basic equipment to connect thereto) should be available to all as a government “entitlement”.
Satire is dead, folks. You think it’s made up & funny, I’ll find someone who earnestly believed/promoted/did it well before the notion occurred to you.
I want someone from the Marine Corpse to hold my umbrella when it rains.
Maybe Obama will let you have one of the infected Marines when they get back from Liberia.
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