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DUmmie FUnnies 01-15-13 (DUmmies Slam Lance Armstrong)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | January 15, 2013 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 01/15/2013 6:37:16 PM PST by PJ-Comix

You want to be a successful LOUSY FREEPER TROLL in DUmmieland? Then you need to build up your post count so as to avoid any suspicions. It is tough to do on the political threads where I generally just post fairly innocuous comments. However, sometimes there are DUmmie threads where I completely agree with the sentiment, such as F*ck Lance Armstrong.. where I was able to post my REAL opinion several times without fear of detection as an LFT. One fringe benefit was that WILLIAM RIVERS PITT joined the thread with a FALSE observation. I was tempted to ask him if he ever met Lance Armstrong at Bukowski's and then invited him home but his idiocy was soon corrected by someone else. So let us now watch the DUmmies 'Roid Rage against Lance Armstrong in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if I should award myself a Kewpie Doll, is in the [brackets]:

F*ck Lance Armstrong..

[Ben Burch is happy to oblige.]

He is an asshole. Took everyone for a ride, and now he wants what???..So, What does he want now??? To hell with him.. Sure...it is ugly...but he is/ was a cheating asshole..now, then, tomorrow too.

[I don't get why he is seeking absolution from Oprah. I mean no one watches her network. I wouldn't even know where to access it. Can someone tell me where I can watch the interview online?]

From all of us who NEVER enhanced our skills falsely, all of us who left sweat, blood and tears on the *surface of your choice, I spit on Armstrongs shoes.

[He might be Shoeless Lance Armstrong after all the lawsuits drain him of his cash.]

He should be in jail for the fraud he perpetrated with his business partners.

[Perhaps he could share a cell with the co-author of WILLIAM RIVERS PITT.]

I can understand some folks feeling that way... But there's still a lot of good he did in the world where fund-raising for cancer research is concerned. In fact I think a lot of people connect him more with Livestrong and his recovery than with the cycling anymore.

[It doesn't take long before the complete idiots begin posting on a DUmmie thread.]

And probably caused his own testicular cancer in the first place with steroids and testosterone unintended consequences, and all.

[That's what I don't get. One of the side effects of steroid use, besides the much higher risk of a heart attack, is that your cojones will shrivel up and die as happened with Armstrong. And yet the idiots like him are willing to risk it? Of course, WILLIAM RIVERS PITT is perfectly willing to risk lung cancer or having a hole puncture in the throat from continuing to suck down cigarettes even though his vocal chords are now completely shot due to being coated with globs of nicotine.]

I think everything he did was to burnish his own image or to promote his own causes. He had no interest in funding anything until cancer affected him personally. I don't think he's a great philanthropist by any definition. He's self-interested, narcissistic and needy of attention and adulation.

[Excellent observation, DUmmie LiberalAndProud.]

He never would have admitted it if not caught. It's not so much that he doped, but that he lied about it and continued to lie about it in spite of the evidence. And - maybe the worst part - had a lot of people stand by him and defend his name in good faith while he kept quiet. He's an asshole.

[Excellent observation, DUmmie Avalux. .I couldn't have said it better myself. (or maybe I just did.)]

The USPS is in bad financial shape. How would supporting a cycling team be good for their marketing?

[Because it is perfectly okay to blow ObamaBucks.]

The odd part is, he's actually a phenomenal athlete. I had reservations about his wins, but believed. Now I feel like a sucker.

[The same feeling you had after you PayPaled your $$$ to Bev Harris.]

My life has pretty much always been about bikes. There's so much personality and beauty in the sport. For me it's more than sport. When I rode the road, it was the 60's. Even today the bike is demonized in America. The bike gives one a real perspective on just who is aggressive and who is a lover of beauty. It's hard to put it into a tiny post.

[Then put it into a tiny Speedo like John Effing Kerry.]

I believed in him even when they were stripping his titles. I bought into the line that it was all a conspiracy ginned up by an overeager doping agency, and supported by false confessions from former teammates trying to arrange lighter punishments. Yeah, I'm a bit disappointed.

[I figure you sent at least $100 to Bev Harris.]

...and he's gonna rat on people...f*ck him

[The Scott Rothstein of the cycling world.]

He raised $500 million for cancer research. He's a lying fraud...but that ain't peanuts.

[A lying fraud like you, WILLIAM RIVERS PITT? Turns out Pitt is posting yet more misinformation. However, another DUmmie corrects Pitt less than 24 business hours later as you can see in the next post...]

Myth: Lance Armstrong has raised $500 million for cancer research.

Fact: According Gifford’s investigative piece, LiveStrong — the foundation Armstrong helped to establish after suffering testicular cancer — donated only $20 million to cancer research between 1998 and 2005. In 2005, LiveStrong began phasing out its research donation, and since 2010 the charity no longer accepts applications for research grants.

Instead, the lion’s share of the funds raised by LiveStrong, according to Gifford, have gone to fuzzier assistance programs, like “survivorship” and “global awareness,” and for the worthy cause of helping victims in the U.S. negotiate the thickets of the medieval American health-care system, where the simple and effective Canadian-style Medicare system is rejected for the greater profit of insurance companies, drug companies, private hospitals and doctors.

What is more troublesome is that there are two parallel organizations here: Livestrong.org, the charity, and the parallel Livestrong.com, a for-profit entity. And the myth that the charity provides funding for cancer research persists, even though LiveStrong’s own website makes it clear the charity is not in the research business.

[You have to realize that Pitt gets his info from Jason Leopold. Okay, here comes a correction excuse from the Pittster...]

Yikes. Thanks for the info. That's what I get for believing what I hear on sports talk radio. *withdrawing from conversation*

[Better yet, try withdrawing that cigarette from your mouth, Will. No amount of cancer research money is going to prevent your inevitable appointment with the compass needle puncturing a hole in your throat so you can talk.]

No excuse for his behavior and viciousness to people telling the truth about him

[That sounds like Jason Leopold after May 12, 2006.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies; lancearmstrong
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To: PJ-Comix

If only the DUmmies would hold their politicians to any real standard I might appreciate their angst


21 posted on 01/15/2013 7:17:36 PM PST by Smedley (It's a sad day for American capitalism when a man can't fly a midget on a kite over Central Park)
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To: PJ-Comix

If only the DUmmies would hold their politicians to any real standard I might appreciate their angst


22 posted on 01/15/2013 7:17:36 PM PST by Smedley (It's a sad day for American capitalism when a man can't fly a midget on a kite over Central Park)
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To: PJ-Comix

If only the DUmmies would hold their politicians to any real standard I might appreciate their angst


23 posted on 01/15/2013 7:17:39 PM PST by Smedley (It's a sad day for American capitalism when a man can't fly a midget on a kite over Central Park)
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To: PJ-Comix

If only the DUmmies would hold their politicians to any real standard I might appreciate their angst


24 posted on 01/15/2013 7:17:39 PM PST by Smedley (It's a sad day for American capitalism when a man can't fly a midget on a kite over Central Park)
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To: PJ-Comix

Wait just a minute..

Isn’t Lance a huge lib?

Usually DU overlooks the faults of fellow libs.


25 posted on 01/15/2013 7:25:23 PM PST by berdie
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To: berdie

He is a huge lib and a devout atheist.


26 posted on 01/15/2013 7:28:20 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Beware the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

I didn’t realize he was an atheist.

I wonder how he figures he survived cancer. Never mind...


27 posted on 01/15/2013 7:31:30 PM PST by berdie
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To: PJ-Comix
I was able to post my REAL opinion several times without fear of detection as an LFT.

I think I found one of your posts, PJ. It was this one, right?

34. He is a stud muffin. I love lance.

28 posted on 01/15/2013 8:18:46 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Tour de Lance.)
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To: PJ-Comix

>>I just heard on the news that Armstrong did NOT make a real confession on Oprah. He pulled a Pitt and did a partial birth non-apology.<<

I heard something a few minutes ago where obluh said “well, he didn’t say he didn’t not say he didn’t not do it” or maybe not...


29 posted on 01/15/2013 8:22:07 PM PST by freedumb2003 (MOLON LABE)
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To: PJ-Comix

What a bunch of hypocrites these liberals are. But I repeat myself.


30 posted on 01/15/2013 8:46:33 PM PST by TBP (Obama lies, Granny dies.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Inspired by her interview with Lance Armstrong, Oprah begins training for the Tour de French Fries:


31 posted on 01/15/2013 8:46:41 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Tour de Lance.)
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To: Vision

The thing is, cycling is a fair sport because essentially 100 percent of them cheat. If everyone cheats, you have a level playing field, albeit a level playing field of cheaters.

Doping is expected. It’s only considered wrong if you’re American.


32 posted on 01/15/2013 8:49:36 PM PST by TBP (Obama lies, Granny dies.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Oprah and Ellen are working out on their tandem. Ellen usually likes to take the rear.


33 posted on 01/15/2013 8:50:04 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Tour de Lance.)
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To: PJ-Comix

how can I learn to coupon like you?


34 posted on 01/16/2013 4:10:57 AM PST by visualops (artlife.us)
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To: visualops
how can I learn to coupon like you?

Just study the couponing sits on the Web, Grasshopper. Less than four years ago I really began my couponing with getting a simple pack of hot dogs for only about a buck. I've progressed to the point where that would be a buck too much for me when using coupons.

35 posted on 01/16/2013 4:42:35 AM PST by PJ-Comix (Beware the Rip in the Space/Time Continuum)
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To: PJ-Comix

“From all of us who NEVER enhanced our skills falsely, all of us who left sweat, blood and tears on the *surface of your choice, I spit on Armstrongs shoes.”

Dear DUmmie, You didn’t build that!


36 posted on 01/16/2013 5:06:30 AM PST by CSM (Keeper of the Dave Ramsey Ping list. FReepmail me if you want your beeber stuned.)
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To: PJ-Comix

“He had no interest in funding anything until cancer affected him personally.”

No one is allowed to have their opinions “evolve” except dear leader.


37 posted on 01/16/2013 5:09:11 AM PST by CSM (Keeper of the Dave Ramsey Ping list. FReepmail me if you want your beeber stuned.)
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To: PJ-Comix

“he lied about it and continued to lie about it in spite of the evidence. And - maybe the worst part - had a lot of people stand by him and defend his name in good faith while he kept quiet. He’s an asshole.”

“I did not have sexual relations with that woman!” BJ Clinton

Still heralded by DUmmies.


38 posted on 01/16/2013 5:11:41 AM PST by CSM (Keeper of the Dave Ramsey Ping list. FReepmail me if you want your beeber stuned.)
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To: PJ-Comix
He should be in jail for the fraud he perpetrated with his business partners.

[Perhaps he could share a cell with the co-author of WILLIAM RIVERS PITT.]

Perhaps all 0 bummer voters should be in jail for the fraud they voted into office TWICE with fraud in both elections.

39 posted on 01/16/2013 5:29:21 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 (0 bummer inherited a worse economy in 2012 than he did in 2008.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I dont have a huge problem with Lance using PED, because at that level, EVERYONE is taking them. Yep, everyone at the top levels of bicycling is taking performance enhancing drugs. You ever wonder why, when a "cheater" is outed, that the other active cyclists don't disown him? Because they all do it. Does that make it right? Well, yeah, in a way it does. Still makes/made him the best at what they all do.

What I DO have a problem with, is the way he lied. I mean, sure, they all lie, but his was probably the most Epic PED lie in all of sports. The sanctimony, the outrage at his accusers and critics.. that was ugly.

40 posted on 01/16/2013 5:38:48 AM PST by Paradox (Unexpected things coming for the next few years.)
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