Posted on 10/03/2011 10:41:16 AM PDT by Todd Kinsey
I spent my final few months in the Army as the NCO in charge of military funerals. For those that don’t know, our veterans have the option of having full military honors at their funerals. This entails the famous 21 Gun Salute, military pallbearers, and of course the flag draped coffin which is folded graveside and presented to the family.
This was probably the toughest assignment I had during my five years of Army service. Supervising the details of the funeral wasn’t what was hard – what was hard was presenting the flag to the grieving family.
As a veteran, I’ve already told my wife that I would like full military honors when God calls me to the promised land. Part of this honor is classic white marble headstone which comes from Vermont. CBS News recently aired a very informative segment which shows the entire process from mining to completion.
(Excerpt) Read more at toddkinsey.com ...
>> what was hard was presenting the flag to the grieving family
I’ll tell you what else is hard, FRIend — watching a solemn and professional young soldier tenderly presenting the folded flag to the widow of a veteran, without choking back a few tears.
FRegards
When my WWII vet father died in the 80’s all the Navy provided was a foot stone with his dates of service and rank.
I understand that the folding stuff that is done is very boring to our first Grifter-ette, Mooch-Elle . . . When her eyes roll and she tells Obambi "all this for a flag," I guess we gotta' change the ceremony. Wouldn't want to offend her.
My Father was a combat veteran of WWII. My sister handled the funeral. There was a flag already folded which was presented to her by the funeral director. Mother preceded daddy by a couple of years.
I didn’t even know all this was available but it was a nice funeral anyway.
Thank you for sharing!
Interesting. I know when I served in the Army during the 80's, the honor guard detail was rotated among the units on post much like any duty roster to supply an honor guard for vets who had passed on in the area surrounding Ft Polk. I would think the Navy would have a similar system.
I need to thank her again for getting us that. We even had the taps played by a real soldier, not just a recording.
But the grave marker was a foot store to match Mom's. I hated the grave marker. It was just like closing the book on his life. I fought them tooth and nail not to put that on Mom's grave. I didn't want her life to be over, she died a year after Dad.
Now my s. o. has passed away. I found him dead on the floor and I thought he was still warm. The paramedics had me pump his heart which seemed like forever til they got there. But he had been dead for 3 hours they said.
This time it was me who arranged stuff. Just last Friday I got a call that the headstone had arrived. It is just so nice and I want to have it installed next spring, after the weather clears. They don't do it in the winter here.
I was so glad to know what the stone was, it does look like white granite. The funeral home sent in his DD-214 but the fact that he got a Bronze Star is not on the market. Rather his rank ET1. No one cares what rank he was, I want to have the bronze star info on the marker.
CAN I DO THAT?
I had that duty for a coupe of funerals when I was stationed at Ft. Polk in 1973.
I had that duty for a couple of funerals when I was stationed at Ft. Polk in 1973.
One our boys is a officer in the Navy and when my husband died, he presented me with the Flag. It was a surprise to me, and probably one of the most touching events in my life. Tears just thinking about it.
The other day my kids went to a memorial for a Seal friend. The Leap Frogs parachuted and then presented the Flag to his widow.
We got a flag too as I recall. It was a long time ago.
It is my understanding that on VA supplied markers or grave stones, the current policy is to only designate those who are medal of honor recipients. Check with your local VA office, they will have official word.
I think that you can if it has not been installed.
I see things like that on other markers in the national cemetery where my husband is buried.
I will also be buried with my husband, and my name will be on the back of his military stone. His was free. Mine will be 300.00.
Talk to your local VFW. They asked us what additional info we wanted on our father's marker they provided.
Good link from DOD explaining procedures etc.
Looks like best bet is Funeral Director as they are pretty much up on what can and can not be done.
Naturally, a DD214 (or equivalent) is needed to start.
www.militaryfuneralhonors.osd.mil
This site answers a lot of questions regarding Veteran Funerals.
I doubt the government will replace that marker. Perhaps you could get a small bronze marker that installs flush with the ground indicating he was a bronze star recipient. They could probably even cast the medal into the marker.
My wife said the same thing when she read it.
Thanks, snapping a crisp salute.
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