Posted on 07/11/2010 11:43:41 AM PDT by John Semmens
Wheat Ridge, Colorado homeowner, 82-year-old Robert Wallace, has been charged with attempted first degree murder for firing shots at two men who stole his trailer. The thieves—Damacio Torres and Alvara Cardano—have prior arrest records and are suspected of being in the country illegally.
Jefferson County District Attorney, Scott Storey called the shooting completely unjustified. “First of all, at best, Wallace was confronting persons engaged in a property crime. The appropriate response is to let the property be taken. If it can later be located and he can prove it is rightfully his he may get it back. As it turned out, Cardano will carry the scars of his bullet wound on his face the rest of his life.”
“Second, even though Torres and Cardano took the trailer it is not proven that they are thieves. Perhaps they thought it was abandoned property. This is a matter for courts, not Wallace to adjudicate and enforce.”
“Finally, in a broader social context, it’s possible that Torres and Cardano’s need for this vehicle is greater than Wallace’s claim to it. They can’t get jobs if they’re in the country illegally, yet they still need money to live. Until we have comprehensive immigration reform we will continue to be faced with such conundrums.”
Storey hinted that the charges against Wallace might be reduced if “he can work out a mutually agreeable compromise solution with Torres and Cardano. Threatening to ‘throw the book at him’ gives us leverage to encourage him to cooperate along these lines.”
Unmentioned were the statistics that affect the County’s budget for the Prosecutor’s Office. Inducing Wallace to plead to a lesser charge is recorded as a “resolved case.” Trying to prosecute illegal aliens, who likely will skip out before trial, will leave an “unresolved case.” The ratio of resolved to unresolved cases factors into the DA’s performance rating—affecting salaries and overall budget allocations for the next fiscal year.
So is the DA also the defense attorney as well? What a jerk.
Please let me be on one of these jury’s!
From just under the headline: Semi-News/Semi-Satire.
Wallace was a member of the militia shooting at foreign invaders. This DA must be a Democrat.
i almost fell for this one, lol!
I would make them spend their money prosecuting me! Since the man is elderly they probably figure they can intimidate him.
satire
Crap, another one I fell for!
Yeah, I saw that just as I hit the “post” button. Still, how many lawyers and DAs have you heard of who will do this very kind of action? Several.
lol, this is the second time.
/johnny
The DA should be fired. He’s going to try to put an 82 year old man in prison for this?
Just keep “John Semmens” in the back of your mind. That’s John’s method of writing.
Satire. I wouldn’t use real names and real events like this.
That’s because the story is basically true. I just embellished it a bit.
Who is this clown
busted its a joke
Unfortunately this is much closer to news than satire.
Unfortunately, it sounds like the truth to me, John.
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