Posted on 04/18/2009 10:42:13 AM PDT by ReformationFan
A friend alerts us to a woman clearly ahead of her time.
According to the Telegraph, a Mrs. Berliner-Mauer, of Sweden, recently revealed that she "tied the knot" with the famous wall while visiting Berlin in 1979. The blissful creature-to-creature ceremony was conducted "before a handful of guests."
Clearly biased in its reporting, however, the Telegraph castigates the woman as having a "bizarre fetish for inanimate objects." Objectum-Sexuality, to be regressively clinical.
But please: Bizarre?
What's truly bizarre is the newspaper's own embrace of Objectosexophobia. Shame! Shame on all objectosexophobists!
No doubt "wall friendly" New York and California stand ready to grant Frau Berlin Wall renewed status as "member in good standing" of the human race (with the entire U.S. to follow in good order, out of compassionate legal necessity).
And for all you haters out there, just remember this: Love without limits, Matthew 7, diversity is our strength.
Who but the worst of brutes would deny any creature, human, animal, plant, or wall the right to marry, to commune, to couple, to partner, to triangulate?
Uhm, wouldn’t that have ended with the destruction of the Berlin wall in 1989?
Does this mean I could marry “Florida Field”?
I guess by current standards, go for it. Just make sure you get a prenup.
Ehh...
I’ll see your marriage to the Berlin Wall.
And raise you one marriage to the Eiffel Tower.
http://sf.curbed.com/archives/2008/06/05/sf_object_fetishist_marries_eiffel_tower_no_joke.php
I don’t even want to know about the honeymoon.
Let's just say uh, penetration would have been a serious issue.
I want to see what the kids look like.
Perhaps they could’ve made for a double “wedding.”
Where’s the license with the wall’s signature and did the wall actually say, “I do”?
“I’d like you to meet my spouse, Wally...”
Based on his writing in this piece, I think Rick Pearcey could give the lady a run for her money....
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