Posted on 03/25/2009 7:26:37 AM PDT by Notoriously Conservative
I don't know the status of parenting in America. But I know a little about the status of education in America. Parents' growing inability to impose manners and limits on their kids when the kids are in school is reflected in record dropout rates, as well as teen drug and alcohol abuse, teen sex, and unwed pregnancies. Maybe it's parenting that's on the decline, more than the schools.
Exhibit A: My wife and I have just been seated for dinner when the maitre d' walks over and seats a young family at the table next to us and the kids start carrying on like orangutans on a leash.
The parents are going, "Timmy, that's not nice, don't throw your food, stop stuffing your mashed potatoes up your nose." Are mom and dad having fun yet, picking food up off the floor, apologizing to people like us, and wiping food flung across the table off their faces?
Some parents still have this attitude that their kids are too special to be burdened by discipline. And the rest of us are supposed to put up with their little mutants. That attitude really pisses me off.
I hate to break it to them, but the kids aren't special, and I don't have to put up with their behavior. If you can't control your obnoxious little brats, leave them home.
They don't belong out in public annoying other people, period. I don't remember a generation of kids ever so indulged and enabled to behave so badly. What's going on?
I remember as a kid I was expected to behave myself out in public or suffer the wrath of one very angry father. And of all the things that used to piss him off, those expectations didn't seem unreasonable. Something's gone terribly wrong here. My guess is it has to do...
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:) Just curious why you think he is neurotic?
I normally would not speak to a child with that language, but being on the Military base, I will guarantee that it was not the first time he held that word before.
I was talking to my buddy's wife the other day, noticing their youngest and the mischief he gets into, and then out of because of his sweet, devlish smile. He's my favorite because of his mischieviousness. I was telling her that if I ever have kids, I feel sorry for my wife if I ever have a boy like me, because Daddy will probably be encouraging him.
But then the thought hit me, that I'd feel sorry for me if I had a GIRL like me. HA-HA :)
Remember a couple of years back when some school district had the TRULY bright idea of parental accountability? It was somewhere in New England, IIRC. The district was absolutely vilified and the proposal went nowhere. All three of my boys are now in scholastic programs that demand parental involvement. The kids they go to school with now come from the same disadvantaged neighborhoods as the kids they went to school with last year, in a mainstream school, but you cannot tell. Parents in and out of the school all day long, kids following a strict behavioral code, strict dress code--and the kids are polite, smart, excited to be learning. Polar opposite of the hell that was last year's school year. We're so pleased we took our house off the market (for the time being, at least).
LOL do what you can. There will come a time when you really miss them being little and cute (and even frustrating!)
I think of this every time I see one of those bumper stickers saying "my kid is smart because he got good Grades, blah blah blah...". I want to tell them it doesn't mean a d@mn thing...and my cat is still smarter than their dumbed down average kid.
OH my, that sounds just like us..... our youngest turned out great, but it took a lot of patience the first few years. lol
I think any ideas he has on childrearing reflect his own troubled childhood - although even a stopped clock is right twice a day!
I do admit, we treated our daughter differently than we did our son. Things that we found funny when he did them would have gotten her into trouble.... major gender differences.
I remember hearing a story of how a mother was talking to an asian lady one time about "the terrible twos". And the asian lady had never heard of the terrible twos. So the mom explained what the terrible twos were, figuring it was just a cultural communication thing.
After the explaining the asian lady responded "Oh we call that misbehaving".
Hmmm, that's odd that you got that impression. Prager is actually anti-snob. He's always talking on his show about not placing an importance on where a person goes to school or what their IQ is. He has always said that he thinks a person's morals are much more important than their smarts. This is a regular theme of his show.
“Is this admonition still valid in our modern world?”
No. There is no longer right or wrong, EVERYTHING is negotiable.
That is definitely part of it, no doubt. And in probably most cases the only part. Unfortunately I've had do deal with a couple situations more closely aligned with the idea of child-focused and buddies in stead of parents.
One particular situation has actually caused us some problems of late. I am first and foremost Jax mother, whereas in the case of this other child "mommy" is just a name she calls her best buddy who always defends her and gets her out of any trouble she gets herself into regardless of what lies she tells.
The "mother" is absolutely destroying this child. She's not really a bad kid, but nothing is ever her fault whether it be bad grades or something breaking. Her most recent excuse for poor grades was because Jax was mean to her. That's also the reason I have heard as to why she no longer rides the bus and "mommy" drives her to and from school every day.
The bus driver tells an entirely different story, and one I am much more inclined to believe.
I'm the first to admit my daughter has her moments, she is her mother's daughter after all, but at least she will own up to being at fault when she is. Now if I could just get her to break her habit of always sticking up for the other one.
Do we know each other? Are we related? :)
By the way, in my younger years playing football and baseball, people called me Mad Dog.
There was a school in Atlanta, I think, that was making parents come get their children if the children wouldn’t accept reasonable discipline. I don’t know if it’s still running, but I thought it was a brilliant idea.
I’m very happy for you and your kids! I think that when things are organized in a way that *truly* is for the benefit of children, ordered to forming them into moral and productive adults, everyone is happy.
I've never read he had a troubled childhood. From what I've read and heard him say about his parents they were very loving to both he and older brother. He adores his dad and has him on his show each year on his birthday. His parents are in their 80's and still alive and married to each other. His dad's mother was a very hard woman to please as far as his dad went, but she treated her grandkids very nice too. Are you possibly thinking of Michael Medved? I don't think his parents had a great marriage and they did get divorced.
Your example is what I meant about adults' putting themselves first, while creating the impression that the child is the center. An adult who is a young child's "best buddy" is using the child to fill a need of the adult, not looking out for the child's interest. The child's interest includes having other children for friends, having responsibilities and accountability, and NOT being the sole source of an adult's happiness and companionship.
I'm not the best example in this area: I've treated Anoreth as an adult since she reached her teens, and often it's been "the two of us against the howling mob." When she leaves, I'm going to have to work much harder, both at crowd control and at finding interesting people to talk to (in Real Life ;-).
Depends on the interpretation, I suppose. I got the impression of a loving relationship characterized by serious conflict, as well.
Maybe he’s different on the radio than in writing.
Not that I’ve noticed—same guy on his show and in his writing.
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