DUmmie FUnnies 01-17-09 (Inauguration Fever hits DUmmieland!)

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | January 17, 2009 | DUmmies and Charles Henrickson

[Charles Henrickson]

The day is surely drawing near! Obamassiah has mounted the Democrat donkey and is approaching the Holy City for his triumphal entry! The countdown continues! Will the ball descend in Times Square? I don't know. TV hosts are breathless. They're fawning over Obambi, the Young Prince. It's quite sickening, actually.

But Inauguration Fever is on the rise in DUmmieland, even as the temperatures in DC are going down! Maybe we can catch some of the festivities on TV. Do you think any of the networks will cover it? YA THINK? It's ALL OBAMA, ALL THE TIME! "Wall-to-wall" coverage? More like, "Through the walls, down the stairs, up on the rooftop, over the river and through the woods" coverage! But the adoring Obambats in DUmmieland are giddy, and they'll be glued to every inspirational moment. Check out this THREAD, "Televised Inaugural Events all in one Handy Dandy Post!"

So get out your Winky-Dink screen and place it on your television, so you can help draw the way for Obambi to get to Washington in time. Use the Bolshevik Red crayon, which is the same color as the DUmmie ejaculations below, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, who unfortunately will be washing his hair all day Tuesday and thus will miss ObamaFest, is in the [Barackets]:

Televised Inaugural Events all in one Handy Dandy Post!

[Oh, good! Tell me about all the stuff I won't be watching!]

Ok, I was going all cross-eyed looking at the spreadsheets I had for the activities worth watching over the next five days and decided to just make a list.

[How about making a list of all the TV programming that will NOT be Obamamatic? That would be a lot shorter.]

Hopefully, someone else will find this helpful.

[I find it unnecessary. Flip on any channel and it's bound to be Obama Time.]

All times Eastern

[All coverage fawning.]

Saturday
10am - CSPAN - Obama's Love Train departs Philly.

[People all over the world, join hands. . . .]

1pm - (tv coverage uncertain) - Train picks up Joe Biden . . .

[At the Home Depot.]

in Wimington. . . .

[I thought he lived in Scranton?]

4:15pm - (tv coverage uncertain) - train arrives in Baltimore, another ceremony likely to follow.

[Palm branches to be distributed.]

5pm - MSNBC - Hardball with Tweet for what I assume is the train arriving in DC.

[The thrill running up Tweety's leg may cause technical difficulties.]

Sunday
2:30pm - HBO (you dont have to have HBO but you DO have to have cable)

[HBO to be renamed BHO.]

Inaugural Celebration Concert at the Lincoln Memorial

[Lincoln Memorial to be renamed Barackropolis.]

(HBO's site says "watch a message from the President elect" while CSPAN says "address by the President elect." he may be there or may not be)

[Present-Elect?]

Monday
8pm - Disney Channel - Kids Inaugural Ball - appearance by Michelle and Jill.

[AKA Minnie and Daisy.]

Tuesday
all day coverage . . .

[WE WANT MORE! MORE! MORE! WE CAN'T GET ENOUGH!!!!]

11:30am - Inaugural Ceremony Beings

[BlackBerry Hussein Obama, strange being from another planet. . . .]

2:30pm - parade actitivies

[Here we'll be doing parody activities.]

(Bush's departure etc)

[NO! NO! HE CAN'T LEAVE! WHAT WILL WE DO WITH OUR BDS????]

8pm - ABC - Neighbohood Ball

[There goes the neighborhood!]

appearance by Barack and Michelle.

[Oh joy! Oh rapture! Bamalot!]

Please! if I left anything out, lemme know!

[WE MUST KNOW . . . EVERY . . . SINGLE . . . SECOND!!]

I guess I be will be glued to C-span all day Saturday.

[It's kind of like sniffing glue, isn't it?]

If anyone wants to see the Obama Radio Nation event with Randi, Stephie, Bill Press, Ed Schultz and others, it will be on C-SPAN from 4-7 on Sunday.

[The Triumph of the Moonbats!]

Maps, Performers, Parties, Balls, etc.

[Barf Bags not included.]

I am so excited...I have my own countdown clock!!!

[I myself am counting down the days to 1-20-13.]

Mods- can we keep this pinned and open for late edits?

[How about we frame it and bronze it and place it on our mantel?]

I believe I'll be kicking this. . . .

[I believe I'll be sick.]

I took the day off to celebrate.

[A day off from not working.]

I will be checking in here all day to see if any fellow DUers will be posting pictures with little stories about all the joy and excitement.

[I'm all atwitter! I'm like a little schoolgirl!]

I cannot wait for Tuesday. . . .

[I cannot wait for 2013.]

whoot!

[w00t!]

well, just dont expect any pics of me on the couch in my PJs because I'm not putting on any makeup until Tuesday night!

[You should try the smudge-free mascara, ben. Tears of joy are not a problem.]

I will be DVR'ing all of this.

[It's already DRVing me crazy.]

I assume CNN will be covering the train arriving too?

[CNN has a correspondent just to cover the porters.]

the places where I wrote (TV coverage uncertain) I am assuming CSPAN, MSNBC, CNN etc. will be covering those, but I couldn't find any definate listings.

[It will be everywhere, all the time, on every channel, don't worry. The Hunting & Fishing Channel is doing "Favorite Duck Calls of the Obamas." The Food Network is having an "Arugula Marathon." CNN/SI is doing a special "Swimsuit Edition: Obama's Pecs." But the capper will be on the Fashion Channel, "Michelle's Extreme Makeover: Jackie Style."]

Any ideas what channels are going to cover this stuff?

[All of them. Indeed, special channels are being created, even as we speak, to beam the events to other planets. Enjoy!]

[bcsco]

Well then, I’m going to do a little kitchen work and make some fazool, pazul, fagioli. Sounds pretty darned good. Just one question; what kind of beans do you prefer?

[Paul Heinzman]

I think cranberry beans are typically used, though any starchy legume would work. The great thing about pasta e fagioli is that is so full of starchy goodness that the next day you can mash it up, dredge it in flour and fry up patties.

[Paul Heinzman]

All times Eastern

One, Two, Three O'clock, Four O'clock Barack,
Five, Six, Seven O'clock, Eight O'clock Barack.
Nine, Ten, Eleven O'clock, Twelve O'clock Barack,

We're Barack around the clock tonight.

[Paul Heinzman]

Well then, I’m going to do a little kitchen work and make some fazool, pazul, fagioli. Sounds pretty darned good. Just one question; what kind of beans do you prefer?

You won't regret it. Fasta Pazul is a meal that fills the belly, warms the heart and cleans the bowel. (That last part is kind of yucky, but very important.)

[Roscoe Karns]

Tuesday
5pm - MSNBC - Matthews and Olbermann rushed to hospital for that 4 hour side-effect that the Viagra commercials warn you about. Oddly enough, ahead of them in line at the Emergency entrance is Rachel Maddow. In fact, the ENTIRE media establishment is there, all for the same exact reason. Except for Larry King. He's hopeless.

[pillut48]

I feel dirty!! And creeped out too...
[waves madly at any lousy DUmmy trolls eavespeeping on FR]

LOL. ;-)

[pillut48]

Indeed! The only time I cry here is when I’m laughing so hard my side starts hurting!!! :-)

[blows kisses to lousy DUmmy trolls]

:-p

[pillut48]

I am impressed you know what arugula is!! :-)

(And no, lousy DUmmy trolls, it’s not a kind of spider, LOL!)

[pillut48]

Are you trying to barack the FR spirit? Cause I don’t think it’s working! ;-)

[Paul Heinzman]

Are you trying to barack the FR spirit? Cause I don’t think it’s working! ;-)

Meanwhile, "poutrage" is flaring up anew over on Skin's Island. Seems the gay bishop's microphone didn't work. Not that it mattered; that part of yesterday's party was not televised on HBO anyway.

Will Rick Warren's mic be on?

There are few absolutes in these complicated events, but to quote the lovely Governor Palin, "You betcha!"

[bcsco]

LOL!

We’re going to see friends today to celebrate a belated Christmas (gifts for the kids). I’m going to launch that one on them BWAHAAAAHAAAAAA!

Oh, and thanks for the info on Pasta...whatever. I’m going to do a batch later soon...

[pillut48]

Meanwhile, "poutrage" is flaring up anew over on Skin's Island. Seems the gay bishop's microphone didn't work. Not that it mattered; that part of yesterday's party was not televised on HBO anyway.

Yup, saw an article about that here--look for HBO to be picketed by the LGBT sometime later this week because of their 'intolerance' and 'prejudice' towards the so-called 'man of god'! ;-)

I'm still wondering if Rick will man up and actually say the words "Jesus Christ" during his prayer, or if he'll cave and make his prayer 'more tolerant and inoffensive' for all those other religious folks out there who aren't stupid enough to be Christians! Think I'll post this separately, it's pretty interesting reading!

[Paul Heinzman]

Yup, saw an article about that here--look for HBO to be picketed by the LGBT sometime later this week because of their 'intolerance' and 'prejudice' towards the so-called 'man of god'! ;-)

I watched the video at that link. Have you ever seen a group of more disinterested people during a prayer? Bunch of homophobes, looks like to me.

[Paul Heinzman]

look for HBO to be picketed by the LGBT

That's LGBTQ! You forgot the Q! I still haven't figured out exactly what the "Q" is for. Of course there is queer, but what in that is not covered by the first four letters.

There was a string of posts on DU, after the Warren dust-up first started, asking that same thing. Near as I could tell, it stands for questioning. So I found a second use for DU.

The first, and best of course, is the DUmmie FUnnies. The second is to serve as a lexicon for the accelerating degeneration of our society.

[Paul Heinzman]

Here's a more specific RECIPE that looks pretty good. I was wrong about the beans, it's not cranberry beans but cannellini beans. Of course, as with any soup, fasta pazul is a great way to clean out the fridge.

[pillut48]

I’m sorry, but that’s just a bunch of quazy talk IMO! ;-)
[runs and ducks pieces of uncooked pasta thrown my way]

[acad1228]

Thank God I have every episode of The Big Bang Theory on my laptop. That ought to keep me entertained while this Apostacy in ongoing.