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DUmmie FUnnies 08-05-08 (No More Gloating About Obama Poll Numbers)
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | August 5, 2008 | Cenk Uygur, KOmmies, and PJ-Comix

Posted on 08/05/2008 4:18:34 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

Remember how just a few weeks ago the DUmmies and KOmmies were loudly gloating about how far ahead Barack Obama was in the polls? They thought that Obama had already won the election and were already high-fiving each other over the "victory." Well, all that has changed with new polls showing the race even (which actually means Obama is behind). I just went to the DUmmie Greatest page and did a search with the word "poll." No such word was found. The KOmmies have also quit talking about polls with the exception of Cenk Uygur of the Young Turks who worried out loud with this THREAD with the nervous titled of "Why McCain Has Caught Obama and What Obama Can Do About It." According to David Brooks of the New York Times there is not much that Obama can do about it because basically he STINKS at politics as you can read in his COLUMN, "Where’s the Landslide?" Read the whole column but according to Brooks, Obama is a "sojourner" who is pretty much disengaged from everyday life including politics. Somehow it is going to be very hard for Obama to completely change his character in just a matter of weeks. However, Cenk Uygur is holding out the audacity of hope that Obama can change and reverse his poll plunge. So let us now watch the KOmmies sweat nervously over Obama's steep poll decline in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, happy that the Democrats are now stuck with a lemon, is in the [barackets]:

Why McCain Has Caught Obama and What Obama Can Do About It

[Completely change his disengaged personality overnight?]

There are two principal reasons why John McCain has caught Barack Obama in the national polls. 1) McCain has changed the whole conversation about this election into one question - do you want to vote for or against Obama? This is genius. Obama needs to switch the conversation if he wants to win. 2) Obama has only played defense so far and has not attacked at all. This is weakness and a sure-fire way to lose an election.

[Not attacked at all? Surely you jest. Plus the MSM is doing plenty of attacking on Obama's behalf.]

This isn't some esoteric campaign of Barack Obama versus history. That's what the McCain camp wants. This is a real political fight between two real people. And until Obama realizes that and gets in the fight, he is not going to win. Take a swing, for the love of God. Show the American people you can be a man, a strong leader, someone who can knock an opponent down. This is an election dammit. Act like it.

[Uygur goes into a long winded essay about his worries but I skipped over that to his last paragraph above. Bottom line, this sounds like buyer's remorse from the Democrats. Now on to the other worried KOmmies...]

I think Obama and his camp know they need to wake up.

[The alarm clock is set for November 5.]

Anyhow, I sure hope Obama is not allowing anyone who was ever remotely close to Bob Shrum anywhere near his campaign.

[I'm hoping that Bob Shrum becomes part of Obama's campaign just to watch you sweat. Shrum is like the talisman of Bad Luck.]

I've been a huge Obama supporter since the primaries (check my post history), but this is turning out like a 2004 Kerry redux. What the hell are they waiting for? It's time to play offense!

[Bob Shrum can console you.]

I fear that if the present trend continues Obama will go the way of Kerry. This MUST NOT happen, there is much to much at stake, now.

[Keep that Freudenschade victory champagne on ice.]

Well, Obama was ahead of McCain in Colorado and is now polling four points behind. But I guess that's just one poll...

[The other poll shows Obama 6 points behind in Colorado.]

We need to recapture the narrative and we'll be fine.

[Is that the same as "framing?"]

We don't need rope-a-dope...We need Jake LaMotta in the last round of a prize fight, litterally pummelling John McCain to the mat...and continuing to pummel him even after the ref has blown the whistle.

[FUn Fact: Jake LaMotta's son, Jack, and I were both thrown out of a TV biology class together.]

I think the Obama campaign should play better defense in the near-term, though -- better execution of what they're apparently trying to do: showing that Obama is a substantive guy, and pointing out that without negativity, McCain's got nothing. They should wait until after the conventions for the main eviscerating of McCain as an unprincipled, low-wattage, flip-flopper, drawing choice selections from the vast archive of McCain position-switching and mis-statements.

[Blah-Blah-Blah. Bottom line is that Obama STINKS at politics. Face it. You folks got stuck with a LEMON.]

Time for the Obama campaign to strike a new narrative and get their message retooled.

[Why do I have the feeling that we will being seeing this same advice right up to election day on November 5 about the Obama campaign needing a new narrative and retooling?]

The whole world sees this race as a no-brainer, except for here in the United States. Obama should win it, but there's no certainty there, and this diarist is exactly right about what his campaign needs to do to start to move away from McCain. Hit hard again and again and again.

[Hit him again! Harder! Harder! Blah-blah-blah.]

Obama needs to, has to, must articulate the real problem and make it in less words to fit in a soundbite to convince the voters.

[Yet more backbench advice. Blah-blah-blah.]

Obama could lose this thing and if he does it'll be the Mt. Everest of political f*ck-ups, because he should be absolutely annihilating McCain.

[Meanwhile, Hillary waits quietly in the background planning, plotting.]

Obama is focusing too much on "issues" imo. We here know that is what is important, but middle-America responds to gossip and to character analysis. We now have a People Magazine-electorate for the most part, unfortunately, and most people don't know or really care too deeply about the issues; Obama needs to get personal to shape a negative view of McCain, imo. I know he will hate doing it, but he has to do it or McCain will win this election by negative ads.

[Maybe Obama should pick Father of the Year, John Edwards, as veep to be his attack dog on character issues.]

I love the man and respect his political skills but if the dems lose this f-ing election b/c they take the high-road and don't engage the fight then I'm pulling all-my-gdamn-hair-out and giving up on the party.

[Would you mind donating that hair to Evan Bayh? He needs a new wig.]

LBJ's campaign against Goldwater was a primer in how to smear your opponent. LBJ's campaign portrayed Goldwater as mentally unstable.

[So you need to smear better?]

Obama Needs To Re-Frame the Debate....

["Blah-blah-blah," bloated the backbencher.]

The best thing he can do is forget about this new politics of hope stuff. It's not working. He's not even ahead in an election that provides the most fertile ground for a Democrat in a generation.

[L-E-M-O-N.]

I'm having the same sick-to-my-stomach feeling that I had in August 2004 when Kerry's team waited a criminally long time to respond to the Swift Boat ads.

[Kerry STILL hasn't responded to those ads.]

punch back and punch back hard -- and not with a "white paper" on energy. Spend money on an ad and slug him with it. This namby pampby stuff won't cut it. And the reversal on drilling was ludicrous.

["Blah-blah-blah," bloated the backbencher.]

We need Kerry, Biden, and Hillary Clinton out there as surrogates.

[We also need John Edwards out there too. Don't forget about him.]

I had dinner last night with an Indian friend, a devout Hindu who really knows his astrology charts and believes them wholeheartedly, and he said that the planets have aligned for big positive changes around early November of this year, and January of next year, especially in world events. He is sure that this means Obama will win. For what it is worth.

[Then you can relax because the moon is rising in Uranus.]

Obama is listening to the same people who advised Kerry, apparently. And here was me, feeling pretty good, all things considered, under the impression he and his people are smarter than that.

[That mouth you see whispering into Obama's ear belongs to Bob Shrum.]

I'd make signs that deliberately misspell his name "John McCane," and I'd show a picture of a walker or a cane. I'd have people passing out prune juice in front of his events and drop innuendo about him losing his marbles. Viral videos and e-mails questioning McCain would be a huge plus, too.

[I'd curse loudly while stomping on a McCain sign. Then I would poo-poo in front of a McCain headquarters. Yeah, that'll show 'em!]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: barackobama; kommies
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To: PJ-Comix
We need Kerry, Biden, and Hillary Clinton out there as surrogates.

What about Rielle Hunter as surrogate mother?

61 posted on 08/05/2008 9:42:13 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Vertigo posthumous: Obama's campaign is dying so fast it'll make your head spin!)
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To: PJ-Comix
I had dinner last night with an Indian friend . . .

Did you say the Hopi Indian prayer?

a devout Hindu . . .

Oops! Wrong kind of Indian.

who really knows his astrology charts and believes them wholeheartedly, and he said that the planets have aligned for big positive changes around early November of this year. . . .

November 5th, to be specific. Optimum time for Democrats to vote.

DNC-ing with the Stars.

62 posted on 08/05/2008 9:46:25 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Vertigo posthumous: Obama's campaign is dying so fast it'll make your head spin!)
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To: PJ-Comix
I'd make signs that deliberately misspell his name "John McCane," and I'd show a picture of a walker or a cane. I'd have people passing out prune juice in front of his events and drop innuendo about him losing his marbles. Viral videos and e-mails questioning McCain would be a huge plus, too.

So do it, slacker. Or did you mean "I want SOMEONE ELSE to do this?" Here's a clue, free, gratis, on-the-house: people who have the initiative to DO anything also have their own ideas and don't need yours.

63 posted on 08/05/2008 10:48:04 AM PDT by nina0113 (If fences don't work, why does the White House have one?)
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To: 50sDad
I guess this means we should just do Charts on the poor, pinpoint how the Universe has screwed them, and compensate them with government programs and tax dollars?

Wouldn't that Malevolent Universe just snatch all the programs and dollars away again? After all, if you're fated to be a loser...

64 posted on 08/05/2008 10:50:30 AM PDT by nina0113 (If fences don't work, why does the White House have one?)
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To: nina0113

I guess that would be “Social-Calvanism”? ;)


65 posted on 08/05/2008 11:24:09 AM PDT by 50sDad (OBAMA: In your heart you know he's Wright.)
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To: PJ-Comix
And the reversal on drilling was ludicrous.

I think Obama would rather forget the word "Ludicrous".

66 posted on 08/05/2008 12:48:19 PM PDT by beckysueb (Drill here! Drill now!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Did you say Optimum time for Democrats to vote, or Opium time for Democrats to vote?

Careful, you’ll get them anxious and confused ;’}


67 posted on 08/05/2008 1:11:56 PM PDT by rockrr (Global warming is to science what Islam is to religion)
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To: PJ-Comix
I fear that if the present trend continues Obama will go the way of Kerry.

At this rate, he will out-Kerry Kerry.

68 posted on 08/05/2008 2:16:17 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: PJ-Comix
Time for the Obama campaign to strike a new narrative and get their message retooled.

Rev. Wright, Bill Ayers, Michelle Obama, Jesse Jackson, Ludacris. Yeah, Obama doesn't need any more tools.

69 posted on 08/05/2008 2:18:20 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: PJ-Comix
We need Jake LaMotta in the last round of a prize fight, litterally pummelling John McCain to the mat...and continuing to pummel him even after the ref has blown the whistle.

Just give him a stage, where his bullshit can rage. Though Obama can fight, he'd much rather recite: "That's hope and change."

70 posted on 08/05/2008 2:24:32 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: PJ-Comix
We now have a People Magazine-electorate for the most part, unfortunately

Unfortunately? If it wasn't for the People Magazine, American Idol electorate, your empty messiah wouldn't have won a single primary.

71 posted on 08/05/2008 2:25:48 PM PDT by Argus (Obama: All turban and no goats.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Obama Needs To Re-Frame the Debate....

He needs a new meme, something that speaks truth to power.

72 posted on 08/05/2008 2:34:03 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: PJ-Comix
punch back and punch back hard -- and not with a "white paper" on energy.

Oh, but paper cuts are the worst!

73 posted on 08/05/2008 2:38:38 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: PJ-Comix
And the reversal on drilling was ludicrous.

And his reversal on Ludacris was ludicrous.

74 posted on 08/05/2008 2:41:45 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Typical white paper.

Paperist!

75 posted on 08/05/2008 2:43:51 PM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Enough is enough--FREE LAZAMATAZ!)
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To: PJ-Comix

I predict that McCain will win the electoral vote by around percentage points and win the electoral vote with 278. That is my take on what is happening now. I could be wrong though a McCain landslide is possible.


76 posted on 08/05/2008 4:07:16 PM PDT by YdontUleaveLibs (Reason is out to lunch. How may I help you?)
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To: PJ-Comix
This is a real political fight between two real people.

Uh...what about the millions of voters?

77 posted on 08/05/2008 4:09:43 PM PDT by bannie
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To: PJ-Comix
Obama Needs To Re-Frame the Debate....

Doesn't he have to agree TO a debate before he REFRAMES one?

78 posted on 08/05/2008 4:12:21 PM PDT by bannie
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To: PJ-Comix
It's not Labor Day yet - we haven't even had the conventions yet - typical Republican voters are out vacationing and aren't even following the race just now.

Wait until the first polls after the conventions - it'll be Headzapoppin Time over at DU then.

John McCainley can just run a front porch campaign like 1896 and win easily.

79 posted on 08/05/2008 6:29:13 PM PDT by decal ("You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing.")
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To: PJ-Comix
Obama is focusing too much on "issues" imo. We here know that is what is
important, but middle-America responds to gossip and to character analysis.
We now have a People Magazine-electorate for the most part

Yeah, like the media has been portraying Obama as an ideologue all this time...

80 posted on 08/05/2008 7:06:25 PM PDT by mikrofon (Obamania)
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