Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

WIPE OUT GLOBAL WARMING: CROW PROPOSES LIMITS ON TOILET PAPER - It's NOT satire
washingtonpost ^ | 4/23/07 | GeorgiaDawg32

Posted on 04/23/2007 2:49:29 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32

Crow (4/19, Springfield, Tenn.): I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming. Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.

(Excerpt) Read more at washingtonpost.com ...


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: 3seashells; alliwannadodo; globalwarming; gorebalism; sherylcrow; stickyfingers; toiletpaper
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 81-100101-120121-140 ... 181-198 next last
To: GeorgiaDawg32

Since my wife speaks Spanish, we use Spanglish at lot at home. For example, toilet paper is called “papel de tush.”


101 posted on 04/23/2007 4:49:55 AM PDT by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Caipirabob

lol


102 posted on 04/23/2007 4:50:02 AM PDT by Vision ("Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him." Jeremiah 17:7)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32
This has got to be a joke.

Carolyn

103 posted on 04/23/2007 4:53:19 AM PDT by CDHart ("It's too late to work within the system and too early to shoot the b@#$%^&s."--Claire Wolfe)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

I propose on bathroom per Hollywood mansion and one mansion per eco-bitch.


104 posted on 04/23/2007 4:54:14 AM PDT by Doctor Raoul (What's the difference between the CIA and the Free Clinic? The Free Clinic knows how to stop leaks.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Yossarian

I feel a draft...


105 posted on 04/23/2007 4:54:57 AM PDT by Doctor Raoul (What's the difference between the CIA and the Free Clinic? The Free Clinic knows how to stop leaks.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: Smokin' Joe
Boy, they really are desperate to sell newspapers.

Hey, that's an idea: Ban toilet paper altogether and make people use newspaper instead. That'll increase circulation.

106 posted on 04/23/2007 4:55:34 AM PDT by Silly (plasticpie.com)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: CDHart
not a joke. just an idea that stinks.

"We dont need no stinking latrine police."

107 posted on 04/23/2007 4:56:37 AM PDT by Diogenesis (Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 103 | View Replies]

To: CDHart

nope, no joke..I thought it was satire, could have sworn it was..but it isn’t..


108 posted on 04/23/2007 4:59:08 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32 (The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese..)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 103 | View Replies]

To: Lurker

“I vote we start shipping Crowe our discarded Sears catalogs...”.....

How about another proposal, let’s all start collecting corn cobs and sending them to Crowe...to save the environment, of course....


109 posted on 04/23/2007 5:00:35 AM PDT by auto power
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

What is new here? It is the French Way, s’il vous plait! You visit a French public restroom and have to buy a square from the matron for some outlandish fee before she will unlock a stall...then stands in your way at the exit until you put a tip in the collection tray...


110 posted on 04/23/2007 5:01:55 AM PDT by Rosamond
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Sheryl Crow Proposed Limitation on How Much Toilet Paper We Use

http://newsbusters.org/node/12226
(Click for links)
Posted by Lynn Davidson on April 22, 2007 - 20:35

I think I might know the reason that Karl Rove didn’t want Sheryl Crow touching him. He’s read her blog, and he knows where her hand has been. What is it with these environmentalists and scatology? First there was “The Year Without Toilet Paper” in the New York Times, and now this. Muzak-friendly pop-rocker, Sheryl Crow and “An Inconvenient Truth” producer and private-jet aficionado Laurie David are on a cross-country college speaking tour to promote the idea of anthropogenic global warming. Crow is blogging her experiences at the Huffington Post, and this time, she really came up with a Duesey (emphasis mine throughout).
Apparently, Crow wants to save the Earth one toilet paper square at a time. She proposed “a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting” and perhaps “just washing that one square out.” She doesn’t seem to want to pass a law, just culturally berate us into obedience. Here is Crow’s “easy way” to be part of the solution to anthropogenic global warming:

Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don’t want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required. When presenting this idea to my younger brother, who’s judgment I trust implicitly, he proposed taking it one step further. I believe his quote was, “how bout just washing the one square out.”

I’d like to say she was kidding, but based on other global warming “solutions,” it is hard to tell. Wacky ideas abound. A man-made volcano shooting sulfur into the air, giant “space umbrellas” and even getting rid of toilets so we can compost our own waste in a box underneath the sink.

So, when Crow said that instead of paper napkins, we use a detachable “dining sleeve” on specially designed clothes to wipe the mouth:

I also like the idea of not using paper napkins, which happen to be made from virgin wood and represent the height of wastefulness. I have designed a clothing line that has what’s called a “dining sleeve.” The sleeve is detachable and can be replaced with another “dining sleeve,” after usage. The design will offer the “diner” the convenience of wiping his mouth on his sleeve rather than throwing out yet another barely used paper product. I think this idea could also translate quite well to those suffering with an annoying head cold.

Sounds nutty, but it is any different than space suits keeping cow farts from killing Mother Earth or counting on UFO’s to prevent global warming?

It’s too hard to tell when environmentalists are kidding. I’m not even sure if they know. One thing I do know is that the recent push of environmentalism into common culture is no accident. David told the Guardian that after the 2004 elections, she vowed to devote a year to “changing the national debate about global warming.” She exposed her methods with one revealing quote from a conversation with Robert F. Kennedy Jr, “We need to infiltrate popular culture!” That they did. I just hope that while they are infiltrating, they use hand sanitizer.

(h/t Daily Gut)


111 posted on 04/23/2007 5:05:18 AM PDT by Valin (History takes time. It is not an instant thing.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Yossarian

Dear reunion committee,

Take one more off the “missing” list, Mary Jane Rottencrotch has been located!!!

kisses


112 posted on 04/23/2007 5:06:04 AM PDT by NonValueAdded ("The arrogance of ignorance is astounding" NVA 4/22/07)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: NonValueAdded

ROFL..you owe me a new keyboard...


113 posted on 04/23/2007 5:09:18 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32 (The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese..)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 112 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

Clean it up with some TP :) good morning GD


114 posted on 04/23/2007 5:11:56 AM PDT by NonValueAdded ("The arrogance of ignorance is astounding" NVA 4/22/07)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 113 | View Replies]

To: NonValueAdded

mornin NVA


115 posted on 04/23/2007 5:12:53 AM PDT by GeorgiaDawg32 (The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese..)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 114 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32

She’s full of sh__!!


116 posted on 04/23/2007 5:13:40 AM PDT by Conservativegreatgrandma
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Valin
The hypocrisy is manifest.

Does anyone dream that Hollywood's elite would use this requirement for themselves?

Are Ms. Crowe's concerts 'green'? Are her SUVs? multiple homes?

117 posted on 04/23/2007 5:13:50 AM PDT by Diogenesis (Igitur qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 111 | View Replies]

To: Silly

>>Hey, that’s an idea: Ban toilet paper altogether and make people use newspaper instead. That’ll increase circulation.<<

This is hard for me as a constitutionalist - but if it comes down to it, I believe I’d rather ban newspapers than toilet paper. I can get my news elsewhere but there is no substitute for toilet paper.


118 posted on 04/23/2007 5:13:50 AM PDT by gondramB (It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 106 | View Replies]

To: Diogenesis
Does anyone dream that Hollywood's elite would use this requirement for themselves?

IF they do...I really REALLY REALLY don't want to know.

119 posted on 04/23/2007 5:18:40 AM PDT by Valin (History takes time. It is not an instant thing.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 117 | View Replies]

To: GeorgiaDawg32; Arrowhead1952; acad1228; AliVeritas; aomagrat; beachn4fun; BIGLOOK; blackie; ...

And I suppose he thinks his &#!% don’t stink either. LOL

Pinging some friends...


120 posted on 04/23/2007 5:24:15 AM PDT by StarCMC (Honor military recruiters in all 50 states ~ May 19, 2007 ~ http://gatheringofeagles.org/?p=257)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 81-100101-120121-140 ... 181-198 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson