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DUmmie FUnnies 11-07-06 ("If we don't win (and we will) mark my words: It was stolen")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | November 7, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 11/07/2006 1:01:54 PM PST by PJ-Comix

The DUmmies are already getting their excuses in order. See, if they don't win tonight then that means the election was stolen as you can see in this crybaby THREAD whiningly titled, "If we don't win (and we will) mark my words: It was stolen." This reminds me of a kid I used to know who said that if he didn't win at Monopoly or Scrabble or any of a number of other games then it didn't mean he lost, it just meant that someone else cheated. So let us now watch the DUmmies do a pre-emptive excuse strike in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that crybabies are FUn to watch, is in the [brackets]:

If we don't win (and we will) mark my words: It was stolen.

[Better wear a double duty set of Depends tonight just in case.]

Dems have had leads ranging from 2 to 23% for FOURTEEN MONTHS leading up to this election.

[And we all know that the ouija polls are 100% accurate.]

The President's approval rating hovers at 38%

[37.942% to be exact.]

The approval rating for Congress hovers around 20%...and everyone knows it's Republican-dominated.

[And everyone knows that polls are COMPLETELY accurate.]

Last night, **CNN had Dems leading by a full 20%.**

[Well then. You have it in the bag. Break out that Estrich '04 Victory Champagne NOW!]

And you think for ONE MINUTE that some invisible Rovian trick can somehow magically make everyone change their minds in the last 24 hours? No. WAY. It is not possible to erase 14 months of Democratic gains in ONE DAY.

[Democrat gains as scientifically reported by the ouija polls.]

If we lose, I don't want to hear a word about how we were weak, or didn't get out the vote, or looked at somebody crosseyed and blew the election because that's BULLSHIT.

[How about the "Didn't get our message out," excuse used previously by the Democrats?]

If we lose, it was stolen. Know that...and be ready to take action.

[Storm the Dollar Stores and demand they distribute the overstock Guy Fawkes costumes! And now to hear from your equally NUttie fellow DUmmies...]

Action/ What action that we could even talk about. Would prove effective?

[Stepping over the pizza carton barricade at your basement doorway would be a start.]

Yep. No other interpretation. Yet I believe they will try to steal it anyway. Awareness is a lot higher now than 2 years ago. The days of election results in a day are over.

[Send in the lawyers to litigate and extend the voting process to weeks and months.]

In 2004, all the exit polls showed Kerry winning and yet the corporate media mocked anyone who dare suggest the election was stolen.

[How about if we just mock anyone who believes in ouija polls?]

I repeat: If we lose, it was stolen. There is NO other reasonable explanation. Saying you believe the Republicans can pull out a majority in the last 24 hours is like saying you believe in the tooth fairy.

[Actually most tooth fairies in San Francisco will be voting Democrat.]

If we lose, we riot. That's not a threat. That's a guarantee!

[If you lose, you'll be a laugh riot. That's a guarantee!]

If we do not get BOTH houses it was stolen again. We riot! Take to the streets! I wont take this anymore. People are fed up all over the country. Just read the stories DUers post here about relatives, neighbors and just plain strangers are converting over to our side. The exit polls will tell the tale.

[And we all know that exit polls can't possibly be wrong.]

They get off on beating Democrats. Democrats rioting would be good news to these thugs. They love watching police beat the poor. Don't given them the pleasure of beating on Democrats. I would suggest a consumption strike would be the tactic to use to hurt the GOP the worst. No purchases of new non-essential goods from multinational corporations. If someone has a car die, or clothes shredded in a disaster, buy used or buy from local businesses. No new cars sold to Dems. No new homes built for Dems. No luxury goods bought by Dems. We'd crash the economy in a few months, and no blood is drawn. They can't make us buy their stuff.

[Not One Damn Dime Day sure ruined our economy the last time around.]

They only way you stop the greedy is by threatening their money. A consumption strike hits the neo-cons right where it hurts them the most. Their wallet.

[I think you have a case of consumption in the old sense of the word.]

With this voter turn out expect a rout. A tsunami is coming. This wil be the largest voter turn out in mid terms. They cannot steal this can they?

[All your Diebolds belong to US!]

The only "excuse" for defeat in this clear-cut pro-Dem election is fraud. There is no other plausible explanation...the Dems have been leading too strong for too long to lose honestly.

[Tonight the Great Pumpkin will finally arrive...or else.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2006electionfraud; dncbrownshirts; dummies; election2006; howtostealanelection; rentamob
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This is a good time to ask to be placed on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List since there will be many Election Day DUmmie FUnnies Special Editions coming out in the next few hours.
1 posted on 11/07/2006 1:01:57 PM PST by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix

ibtp?


2 posted on 11/07/2006 1:02:48 PM PST by digger48 (there went breakfast)
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


3 posted on 11/07/2006 1:02:50 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

#2?


4 posted on 11/07/2006 1:02:50 PM PST by rocksblues (Do unto others as they do unto you!)
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To: PJ-Comix

IB4P


5 posted on 11/07/2006 1:03:08 PM PST by Talking_Mouse (wahhabi delenda est)
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To: Talking_Mouse

Top 10 IATP. Now to read.


6 posted on 11/07/2006 1:03:53 PM PST by NathanR (Après moi, le deluge.)
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To: PJ-Comix

I would love to be on the PING list, please! This is the funniest stuff I've seen all day, BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! :-)

(wipes tears from eyes)

Those DUmmies, you can always count on them for a thigh slapper, eh? ;-)


7 posted on 11/07/2006 1:04:12 PM PST by pillut48 (CJ in TX (Bible Thumper and Proud!))
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To: PJ-Comix

8 posted on 11/07/2006 1:04:26 PM PST by Petronski (Why won't Diebold talk about RYMB.DLL?)
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To: Talking_Mouse

Top 10...PJC is DA MAN!


9 posted on 11/07/2006 1:04:34 PM PST by JerseyDvl ("If you attack Americans, we'll defend your right to do it."- The Democrat Party)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10?


10 posted on 11/07/2006 1:04:36 PM PST by ilovew ("I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American." --Daniel Webster)
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To: PJ-Comix

I am praying we hold or extend leads in both House and Senate...your DUFUnnies will be classics for the next couple of days.


11 posted on 11/07/2006 1:04:45 PM PST by MNlurker
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To: PJ-Comix

**If we don't win (and we will) mark my words: It was stolen**

"Heads, we win; tails, you lose."


12 posted on 11/07/2006 1:05:28 PM PST by ilovew ("I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American." --Daniel Webster)
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To: PJ-Comix

Hmmm First Greg Palast claims this election has been stolen and now the DUmmies say it's been stolen if they lose. Sure doesn't sound like the confidant party they try to portray.


13 posted on 11/07/2006 1:05:29 PM PST by cripplecreek (If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?)
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To: PJ-Comix
If we lose, we riot. That's not a threat. That's a guarantee!

If you riot, you lose. That's not a threat. That's a guarantee!

14 posted on 11/07/2006 1:05:57 PM PST by CzarNicky (The problem with bad ideas is that they seemed like good ideas at the time.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10!


15 posted on 11/07/2006 1:06:18 PM PST by beltfed308 (Democrats :Tough on Taxpayers, Soft on Terrorism)
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To: PJ-Comix

top 20


16 posted on 11/07/2006 1:06:24 PM PST by txroadkill (It's a war stupid, not a trial.)
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To: PJ-Comix

After reading their rants, I am glad that I went out this year and purchased another shotgun.


17 posted on 11/07/2006 1:06:36 PM PST by rocksblues (Do unto others as they do unto you!)
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To: PJ-Comix
Top 20!

L

18 posted on 11/07/2006 1:06:47 PM PST by Lurker (“A liberal thinks they can sleep in and someone will cover their lame ass.” Ted Nugent)
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To: PJ-Comix

**In 2004, all the exit polls showed Kerry winning and yet the corporate media mocked anyone who dare suggest the election was stolen**

No, I don't think the "corporate media" mocked anyone. I, however, laughed hysterically at anyone who was so paranoid that anytime they lose, they claim someone stole the election.


19 posted on 11/07/2006 1:07:25 PM PST by ilovew ("I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American." --Daniel Webster)
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To: pillut48

Welcome aboard, PINGEE #954.


20 posted on 11/07/2006 1:07:55 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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