Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

DUmmie FUnnies 06-09-06 ("Glad Zarqawi's Gone? Yes or No")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | June 9, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 06/09/2006 5:23:04 AM PDT by PJ-Comix

"Glad Zarqawi's Gone? Yes or No" seems like a pretty straightforward question but, as we shall see, a "Yes" answer in DUmmieland doesn't really mean a straight "Yes." The "Yes" in DUmmieland is frequently followed by a "But" so that the DUmmies qualify as what Laura Ingraham calls "But Monkeys." In fact there are FEW simple YES answers in DUmmieland which are not followed by numerous caveats by the But Monkeys. So let us now explore the Land of the But Monkeys with their "Yes...but" caveats in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting that the first of Laura Ingraham's But Monkeys yesterday commenting on Al-Zarqawi's death was Joe Biden talking out of both sides of his mouth as usual, is in the [brackets]:

Glad Zarqawi's Gone? Yes or No

[Yes...but.]

This is NOT a DU poll which will allow voters to hide. Bottom line, I want to prove that a large percentage of DUers are glad Zarqawi is no longer on the planet. DUers who are glad Zarqawi's gone please indicate by a simple "yes". The "unglad" indicate with a "no". Please,for the purpose of this experiment, no opinions, just vote yes or no.

[It's not that simple in DUmmieland. Any "Yes" answer NEEDS to be followed by a "But" or some other caveat.]

You are wrong. The answer can not be a "yes" or a "no" because neither answer means anything. I know in your mind it means something, but to anyone that thinks about it for more than a knee jerk split second, you realize that the question is completely pointless.

"Yes, I'm glad" means you are glad we started this war and killed so many people in the bloody pursuit of Osama, Saddam, Zarqawi, (whomever is next).

"No, I'm not glad" seems to mean one is rooting for the official enemy, but does it really mean that? Or does it simply mean that your not glad we are involved in this illegal war in the first place, and they have no other option to say that other than "No."?

Who friggin' knows, because the question is so stupid to begin with.

[One way to avoid becoming a But Monkey is REFUSING to answer the question in the first place.]

Yes, but disgusted that we used an airstrike to kill one man.

[And DUmmie KyuzoGator becomes the FIRST But Monkey on this thread!]

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

Yes. Glad that he's out of action, but not glad about his death.

[Apparently DUmmie But Monkeys like dining on angst over the death of this murderous thug.]

No. We knew where he was, we should have taken him into custody and hauled him before the court. We used to be a nation based on LAW, now we are the wild west and killing for expediency rahter than worrying about the mess of prosecution...

[No Buts about this No. This DUmmie wished we had frogwalked Zarqawi from his safe house into the arms of waiting lawyers.]

If he really is dead, yes. But I am not ready to believe the story.

[And another But Monkey hops into the tree.]

we had the ability to take him alive and should have done so. We could've learned a lot more that way, as long as we didn't torture him because that would be wrong too.

[And it would have been really really wrong to torture him with air conditioning set at a freezing 68 degrees like we do to the Gitmo detainees.]

Yes, but still have questions about the official story.

[The official story is that you are now a But Monkey. Now go grab a banana and hop into the tree.]

The purpose of this exercise is to get a more accurate indicator of where DU stands on Zarqawi's demise. We're getting visitors to this website who are posting claims contrary to the results we're getting so far.

[Wrong. I am a visiting Zoologist to your site merely cataloging your large collection of But Monkeys.]

Yes, but it won't make any difference

[Is that you, Joe Biden?]

Glad he's gone, but a trial would have been a lot more effective.

[Another overly legalistic But Monkey. Up into the tree for you, feller.]

Not crying any tears for him, but just like when they killed Pablo Escobar, will it change anything?

[Up into the tree, But Monkey, and enjoy La Cocaina.]

Makes No Difference. If Bush thinks this will help his approval rating, it won't with me. Too much has happened. Even if they suddenly killed bin Laden it would make no difference. Bush has proven over & over again that he's a fascist. It's too late for him.

[And it's too late for you to play with the But Monkeys.]

Of course the mouth-breathing, blood-thirsty right wingers will consider this as a springboard to a midterm victory, and we will see this coverage trotted out daily, with generous doses of "Hooray for our side"..

[Too bad Zarqawi wasn't killed a couple of days earlier just before the California elections. That way the DUmmies would have provided us with ENORMOUS entertaiment with conspiracty theories about how the death of Zarqawi was really a Rovian plot to affect the outcome of those elections.]

Yes but I don't feel any safer and whatever happened to Bin 'forgotten' and bringing him in dead or alive.

[A banana for you and up into the But Monkey tree.]

Yes.... but it's not that straightforward... Well.. almost. I do wish they had captured him, instead of killed, because it's too easy to make him a martyr by killing him. I'd rather see him brought to justice in a less spectacular fashion. Showing photos of his dead body today, as with the bodies of Saddam's sons, makes me cringe because it's so much like what the insurgents have been doing to us... and the world has recoiled in horror because of it. If the choice of having him loose instead of killed, I'd choose killed... but I fear that his death like this will only fuel the hatred of us more and the insurgency against our troops. In a country, like the US, that does not deal in martyrdom, it's easy to believe that having him dead will somehow improve things, but in the radical fundamentalist circles over in the Middle East, death is an honor and a reason for them to fight harder in his memory.

[And you need to go straightforward into the But Monkey tree.]

No. Give me a good reason why I should be glad.

[I won't even try.]

No would be my answer since morbidity is not my game. I never even knew the guy.

[Who knows? You could have even become pals with Al-Zarqawi and gone fishing with him.]

No. I don't condone killing, period. This was done in my name, with my money, which makes me complicit in something I find morally repugnant.

[Zarqawi, We Hardly Knew Ye.]

We get important visitors to our site and it would be a shame if they got the idea that a large percent of DUers somehow supported the Iraq insurgency. Freepers would love to create that idea.

[We get a lot of visitors to the DUmmie FUnnies and YOUR OWN WORDS give them the idea that the DUmmies need to be institutionalized.]

The blogosphere will know where DUers stand on Zarqawi. The results of this poll cannot be twisted by lurkers into supposed support for Zarqawi.

[The results of this poll will show that DUmmieland is full of But Monkeys.]

If I put the same question to Sen.Feingold, Boxer, Clinton, Kerry, Durbin, Byrd or Kennedy they would have no problem answering "yes".

[You mean "Yes...but" since they are But Monkeys.]

No. (Death is not punishment.) You have to actually be ALIVE to appreciate the fact that you're being punished. Once you're dead, you no longer care... you're dead!

[DUmmie illogic at its finest...and FUnniest.]

I am never happy when somebody dies. I don't care HOW "evil", or bad, or what a criminal, this guy was. I'm not going to cheer his death, when what we should have done, was get him ALIVE and put him on trial.

[I bet you would be OVERJOYED if any one of a large number of EVIL rightwingers dies. And NO TRIAL for them. STRAIGHT the guillotine!]

Neither yes or no.

[The Hamlet of DUmmieland forcefully speaks his mind.]

Glad??? HELL NO!!! Bushler&Co. royally f*cked up again, just for good PR. We should have CAPTURED him to get INFORMATION then publicly TRIED him for all of his crimes so the VICTIMS could have a chance to face him and scream bloody murder at him. Also, how many children were killed by the two 500 lb. bombs? More 'collateral damage' just so Bushler could get a bump in the polls?

[No But Monkey banana for you.]

No. Murder is never the answer to any problem. I'm a Buddhist.

[Is that you, Richard Gere?]

Yes, but I don't think it will make any difference as far as stopping the violence.

[Grab the banana and hop up into the But Monkey tree.]

If I have to pick, I'll say yes. He's a terrorist. But as I said on another thread, there will only be more Al-Zarqawis. If Bush didn't foolishly invade Iraq, it might be more meaningful.

[Take a meaningful banana and carry it into the But Monkey tree.]

Wouldn't it had been more fun to capture him alive and forced him to pose nude??

[A But Monkey of a different species replies.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: alzarqawi; butmonkeys; dummies; lauraingraham
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 81-100101-120121-140 ... 201-207 next last
To: PJ-Comix
No. I don't condone killing, period. This was done in my name, with my money, which makes me complicit in something I find morally repugnant.

Nice to see some Pro-Lifers over at DU. ;)

101 posted on 06/09/2006 10:07:50 AM PDT by Darkwolf377
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix; finnman69
Of course, this being a Big Story and all, William Rivers Pitt (AKA The Wild Bull of the Pompous, AKA Pied Piper Pitt) feels compelled to share his pontifications in a thread of his own, since all his faithful multitudes await with bated breath his wisdom from on high:

This Just In: Zarqawi's death meaningless

This Just In: Zarqawi's death meaningless
Those who fight against the US occupation, and against other sects in Iraq, do not do so because Zarqawi told them to. The fighting and dying will continue. The civil war will expand. All this means, perhaps, is that the violence will be even more chaotic and disorganized. Remember, catching Saddam Hussein was a "turning point," too. Fat lot of good it did. Also, PS, there would never ever ever ever have been an "Al Qaeda in Iraq" had we not invaded. Basically, we killed our own straw man today. We'll find another one tomorrow.

And he's got a typically long, Pittian discourse on the subject at post 69. I will not torture you by reprinting it here.

BTW, there's a little back-and-forth between Pitt critics and Pitt sycophants, as the thread swerves (as all Pitt threads do) into a discussion about Pitt himself:

I view it as a nitpicky attention wanting reply that screams out "hey, look at me, I'm posting something against the great Will Pitt!"

Can Pitt not even defend his thoughts without his cops running around belittling users with alternate opinions?

102 posted on 06/09/2006 10:16:40 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Abu-dabu-DU!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
Glad Zarqawi's Gone? Yes or No

The fact that you even have to ask tells more about DU than you would like people to know.

103 posted on 06/09/2006 10:16:58 AM PDT by kevkrom (Posting snarky comments so you don't have to)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
This was done in my name, with my money, which makes me complicit in something I find morally repugnant.

Remember that sentiment when someone complains about federal funding of obscenity masquerading as art.

104 posted on 06/09/2006 10:19:45 AM PDT by kevkrom (Posting snarky comments so you don't have to)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
We get important visitors to our site and it would be a shame if they got the idea that a large percent of DUers somehow supported the Iraq insurgency.

Translation: It would be a shame for outsiders to really see what we think feel.

105 posted on 06/09/2006 10:20:53 AM PDT by kevkrom (Posting snarky comments so you don't have to)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix; Charles Henrickson
Wouldn't it had been more fun to capture him alive and forced him to pose nude??

Really, benburch, your fantasies are getting seriously out of control.

106 posted on 06/09/2006 10:22:42 AM PDT by kevkrom (Posting snarky comments so you don't have to)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
we had the ability to take him alive and should have done so.

Riiiiiiiight.

And then we would have to worry about AQ kidnapping people, or blowing more things up, demanding his release. No, thanks.

107 posted on 06/09/2006 10:23:01 AM PDT by Purrcival (This FReeper is totally GLAD that scumbag Zarqawi is DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: kcordell
"Everyone knows that Zarquawi was killed because he had incriminating evidence against Rove. /Sarcasm"

Word got out that Fritz was about to have him testify before a grand jury in the Plame affair. He knew too much and had to be terminated with extreme prejudice. Had he been able to testify it wouldn't look bode good for Bush and Cheney. It would have been a summer Fitzmas and Rove was not going to let that happen.

108 posted on 06/09/2006 10:23:46 AM PDT by skimask (People who care what you do don't matter.......People who matter don't care what you do.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 100 | View Replies]

To: JamesP81
You don't bring your enemy before a court during a time of war. You blow the hell out of him and repeat as necessary.

The DUmmies are playing it both ways. They keep bemoaning the "war" in Iraq (despite the actual war having ended a long time ago), and then decry the coalition forces for using warfare tactics.

109 posted on 06/09/2006 10:24:37 AM PDT by kevkrom (Posting snarky comments so you don't have to)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 25 | View Replies]

To: kevkrom; Choose Ye This Day

BTW, kevkrom, you'll notice that Choose Ye This Day already caught the obvious benburch joke back in post 54.


110 posted on 06/09/2006 10:25:59 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Meeting our benburch joke quota on a daily basis.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 54 | View Replies]

To: kevkrom

Woops! As I was writing to alert you, you went and posted #106!


111 posted on 06/09/2006 10:26:55 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Meeting our benburch joke quota on a daily basis.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 106 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
I'd rather see him brought to justice in a less spectacular fashion.

A trial, "less spectacular"?

HAH!

Zarqawi would have turned his trial into a circus, just as Saddam Hussein is turning HIS trial into a circus...and how long was Milosevic on trial, turning HIS trial into a circus?

112 posted on 06/09/2006 10:27:25 AM PDT by Purrcival (This FReeper is totally GLAD that scumbag Zarqawi is DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
Yes.... but it's not that straightforward... Well.. almost. I do wish they had captured him, instead of killed, because it's too easy to make him a martyr by killing him. I'd rather see him brought to justice in a less spectacular fashion. Showing photos of his dead body today, as with the bodies of Saddam's sons, makes me cringe because it's so much like what the insurgents have been doing to us... and the world has recoiled in horror because of it. If the choice of having him loose instead of killed, I'd choose killed... but I fear that his death like this will only fuel the hatred of us more and the insurgency against our troops. In a country, like the US, that does not deal in martyrdom, it's easy to believe that having him dead will somehow improve things, but in the radical fundamentalist circles over in the Middle East, death is an honor and a reason for them to fight harder in his memory.

This DUmmie is a "but...but...but monkey", PJ!

113 posted on 06/09/2006 10:30:27 AM PDT by Purrcival (This FReeper is totally GLAD that scumbag Zarqawi is DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Charles Henrickson
Our Li'l Beaver can beat up their But Monkey.

Careful, CH... you just got back off of suspension, and this sounds dirty enough to attract the attention of an over-zealous moderator...

114 posted on 06/09/2006 10:31:10 AM PDT by kevkrom (Posting snarky comments so you don't have to)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 95 | View Replies]

To: Purrcival
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
115 posted on 06/09/2006 10:31:20 AM PDT by franksolich (wolkenkuckucksheim)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 112 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
No. Give me a good reason why I should be glad.

You may not be a But Monkey, DUmmie, but you ARE, like, totally clueless!

116 posted on 06/09/2006 10:31:44 AM PDT by Purrcival (This FReeper is totally GLAD that scumbag Zarqawi is DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
We get important visitors to our site and it would be a shame if they got the idea that a large percent of DUers somehow supported the Iraq insurgency. Freepers would love to create that idea.

We don't need to "create" the idea, DUmmie. All anyone needs to do is read the posts in DUmmieland...or read the DUmmie FUnnies.

117 posted on 06/09/2006 10:33:53 AM PDT by Purrcival (This FReeper is totally GLAD that scumbag Zarqawi is DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: PJ-Comix
I am never happy when somebody dies.

If there are so many DUmmies who take this position, who are all of the DUmmies who have danced on the graves of prominent Republicans who died (e.g., Ronald Reagan), or were openly gleeful when Laura Ingraham announced that she had cancer? Hmmmmmm? Anyone have a link to those DUmmieland threads? I know they existed, because I saw them.

118 posted on 06/09/2006 10:37:58 AM PDT by Purrcival (This FReeper is totally GLAD that scumbag Zarqawi is DEAD, DEAD, DEAD.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: franksolich

I keep repeating the discovery: THE JERK HAD HAIRPLUGS!!!


119 posted on 06/09/2006 10:40:11 AM PDT by bannie (The government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 115 | View Replies]

To: Purrcival
If there are so many DUmmies who take this position, who are all of the DUmmies who have danced on the graves of prominent Republicans who died (e.g., Ronald Reagan), or were openly gleeful when Laura Ingraham announced that she had cancer? Hmmmmmm? Anyone have a link to those DUmmieland threads? I know they existed, because I saw them.

Some of them are on Scamdy, under the category "On the other hand....." but Scamdy quit collecting the "love threads" a long time ago, because we were in danger of having to absorb, digest, all of DUmmieland.

A lot of love over there, for everyone from the late Pope to unborn infants.

120 posted on 06/09/2006 10:40:26 AM PDT by franksolich (wolkenkuckucksheim)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 118 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 81-100101-120121-140 ... 201-207 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson