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DUmmie FUnnies 12-29-05 ("The post impeachment administration: Powell-Gore?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | December 29, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 12/29/2005 9:43:03 AM PST by PJ-Comix

The only thing more bizarre than the DUmmie THREAD featured in the DUmmie FUnnies this morning where the DUmmies fantasized about a reality-challenged scenario where Bush gets chimpeached is this DUmmie THREAD titled, "The post impeachment administration: Powell-Gore?" As you might have surmised from the title, the DUmmies are already assuming the fantasy of a chimpeachment and are now planning on the makeup of the post-chimpeachment administration. Colin Powell isn't even in government any more but that small fact doesn't seem to interfere with the DUmmie fantasy as you shall see. Even more bizarre is that Powell would somehow choose Al Gore to be his vice-president. But wait, DUmmies! Why stop there? I mean since we are in your Alternate Reality, wouldn't Powell say to himself that Gore was really elected in 2000 and then meekly step aside and let Gore take over the presidency? As usual, the DUmmie Fantasies being channeled from the Alternate Universe are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, envisioning my own Alternate Reality of Petra Verkaik and Salma Hayek battling it out in a hotel room over who gets first dibs at my body, is in the [brackets]:

The post impeachment administration: Powell-Gore?

[Or Tooth Fairy-Kucinich?]

I believe that if the Democrats take the House after the mid term congressional elections, there will be an impeachment. Moreover, the Democratic majority will give cover to disgruntled Republicans to join the impeachment effort.

[How kind of you to give cover to the disgruntled Republicans of the Alternate Universe.]

However, we have to keep in mind that it is almost a certainty that impeachment will not change Republican party control of the executive branch. This is because the outgoing president will control the appointment of a vice president.

[Damn that Constitution!]

As during the Nixon administration, once Congress decides that impeachment is a real possibility, they will first have to force out a corrupt vice president -- then Agnew, today Cheney. It is inconceivable that Congress would impeach Bush, but allow the author and instigator of most of his crimes, Cheney, to assume the presidency.

[And don't forget Denny Hastert. We must get rid of him too! Plus everybody down to about the 145th level of succession.]

This raises an important question for Democrats: Who will be the post impeachment president and vice president?

[Why ask the Democrats? They have NO input as to the post chimpeachment president and vice president.]

Almost all the Republicans in the administration and the Senate are simply too tainted either by the crimes of the administration or corruption in Congress. Both parties' leaders will be trying to clean house, signal a move by the Republicans from the extreme fringe right policy positions and send a message to the international community that the US is ready to return to the "reality based" international community -- all in the same appointment.

[Your use of the term "reality based" already has me doubling up in laughter.]

Frankly, the only viable Republicans are John McCain and Colin Powell, and given the international crisis that Bush has created, Powell is the far more likely candidate.

[Thanx for just killing McCain's primary election chances in '08. Any "Republican" considered "viable" by the DUmmies needs to be prevented from getting the presidential nomination by REAL Republicans.]

At this point, however, because of the unprecedented fiscal, military and international challenges the federal government will face, Democrats need to insist on some kind of "government of national unity" -- in other words, the appointment of a Democratic vice president. The only Democrat with the stature to be vice president under those circumstances is Al Gore, both because of his experience as vice president and because he actually won the popular vote in 2000.

[This fantasy scenario will only happen with the proper astological alignment. Namely Uranus must be aligned in front of your face.]

You may disagree with this analysis and proposed administration, but I hope you'll agree that it's time for progressive Democrats to look ahead and begin planning for the post-Bush administration.

[How about the more modest goal of planning for your institutionalization, DUmmie HamdenRice ? And now on to the other DUmmie comments...]

powell is an asshole solidly in the bush pocket and the world knows he is a liar who likes to advance his own interests ... existing patriotic feelings in powell? NONE! so, why get rid of an asshole to put in place another asshole? sorry for the foul language. i have no other way to express my utter contempt for powell.

[Nice to see you get all worked up over a fantasy that WON'T be happening in this Reality.]

I don't disagree at all ... but the point is, that the Republicans will control the successor to Bush-Cheney. Powell lied about the war, but he has bee furiously apologizing and leaking his embarrassment ever since he left office. Surely you can see he is positioning himself for the succession?

[Yeah. Powell has nothing better to do with his time than planning for a DUmmie Fantasy scenario that WON'T be happening.]

republicans would never vote for GORE and on principle GORE should not stand with any republican in a ticket nor take second place to it. he would be another asshole if he, for a second time, would willingly accommodate the assholes.

[How noble of Gore to turn down a position that WON'T be offered to him.]

After all this national trauma, would you prefer .... Powell-McCain? Or Powell-Santorum? If we are going to control a post-Bush administration, I think we need someone in at a very high level.

[Powell-Energizer Bunny?]

i am not dreamin' republicans are not going to let go of power and control and without the bush machine to act as their backbone...neither sanctoroom nor mackane have the charisma to do what bush has done...unless they are using diebold machines, i have the feeling that even with those two running the country, much of democracy would return to these shores. although, i may be totally wrong.

[Or totally deluded for extending even the least bit of credibility to this thread.]

The succession to the presidency is defined...I don't think your scenario accounts for the fact that the Constitution was amended to provide a clearly defined succession of the Presidency. How is your scenario going to get around the 25 amendment?

[By leaning back, closing his eyes, and clicking his heels together three times while wishing real hard.]

I guess the OP thinks it would go like this: Dubya is impeached and removed from office. Cheney becomes President and appoints a VP, say, Powell Cheney is then impeached and removed from office. Powell becomes President and appoints a new VP.

[Tinkerbell?]

However, Bush will not be removed by the impeachment process. That is just a pipe dream.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

So who will be the post-Bush prez if not Powell?

[ET]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: alternatereality; dummies
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To: PJ-Comix
Cheers? With PJ as the Cliff character?

With PITT as Cliff, I meant to type!

81 posted on 12/29/2005 1:49:27 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Where everyone knows your name--unless you're Pitt!)
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To: Choose Ye This Day
.........penchant for pretensious prose.

Love the alliteration. Captures Pitt's pretentions precisely perfectly.

82 posted on 12/29/2005 1:50:23 PM PST by confederacy of dunces (Don't forget the cheese!)
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To: PJ-Comix

These losers can't understand that they lost the last election. They are in the MINORITY.


83 posted on 12/29/2005 1:54:24 PM PST by Democratshavenobrains
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To: Choose Ye This Day
Ask them if they've ever HEARD of Will Pitt. He acts like these are "his" watering holes, so they should obviously know a pompous, self-aggrandazing socialist with a penchant for pretensious prose.

From the way the woman who answered the phone at Bukowski's sounded, it seems that others have also called inquiring into this mysterious Ty.

84 posted on 12/29/2005 1:58:31 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: confederacy of dunces

Whoops! Sorry about the typo.

Should be "pretentious".

As for sounding like Will Pitt, nothing like damning a guy with faint praise. :o)


85 posted on 12/29/2005 1:58:41 PM PST by Choose Ye This Day (Win the war. Confirm the judges. Cut the taxes. Control the spending. Secure the border.)
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To: Sally'sConcerns
Ya think Pitt might have a bit of the estrogen in his system?

Well, notice this phrase in Pitt's latest (quoted in post 64): "when I am in my cups. . . ."

And then there's that photo (NO ONE POST IT!) of Pitt kissing a boy-DUmmie. . . .

86 posted on 12/29/2005 2:02:57 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Wee Willie.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Verry interesting. Might be the good folks at CU. But it might also be some of Pitt's fellow DUmmies, who realize this is an obvious piece of self-aggrandazing fiction.

"Look at me, I'm so smart. I'm so well-informed. I can educate these ignorant Bushbots, as long as they are imaginary and have an IQ lower than room temperature. Praise me and my fictionalized debate skills!"

And then as soon as someone doubts him, he tosses up the ridiculous $10,000 canard. If he's telling the truth, why make it a bet at all? Why not give out the name of the bar, and Ty's last name? By betting someone $10,000 he is ensuring that no one will attempt to dispute his delusions.


87 posted on 12/29/2005 2:03:28 PM PST by Choose Ye This Day (Win the war. Confirm the judges. Cut the taxes. Control the spending. Secure the border.)
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To: Choose Ye This Day

Pitt's story sounds like something typed up by Jayson Blair.


88 posted on 12/29/2005 2:04:47 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Choose Ye This Day
And then as soon as someone doubts him, he tosses up the ridiculous $10,000 canard. If he's telling the truth, why make it a bet at all? Why not give out the name of the bar, and Ty's last name? By betting someone $10,000 he is ensuring that no one will attempt to dispute his delusions.

EXACTLY. And he also mentioned this incident happened the "other day" which means that Pitt was able to remember word for word conversations that took place at least a day earlier. If it was just a few words quoted that would be one thing but ENTIRE PARAGRAPHS of quotes? Welcome to the Jayson Blair Reporting Award, Pitt.

89 posted on 12/29/2005 2:07:46 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix
"Imagine a Democrat wins the White House in 2008."

No, Pitt, I am NOT doing another "Imagine" parody!

90 posted on 12/29/2005 2:07:51 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Lennonist.)
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To: Choose Ye This Day

Oh! Jeeze! I didn't mean to imply that you sounded like Pitt. Mea maxima culpa! I just meant to compliment your literary skills, in that you captured the character so well.

Happy New Year! I'm gone until Tuesday.


91 posted on 12/29/2005 2:10:41 PM PST by confederacy of dunces (Don't forget the cheese!)
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To: PJ-Comix
"I have a way of going on and on until the paint peels."

Pitt, you have never spoken truer words! Self-realization is the first step toward recovery!

92 posted on 12/29/2005 2:12:09 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The Pitt and the Ponderous.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Notice that Pitt speaks in 15-line paragraphs, and his interlocutor "Ty" speaks in 1-3 word grunts. ("Ty" is played by Lon Chaney Jr. as George in "Of Mice and Men.")


93 posted on 12/29/2005 2:15:47 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (The Ty goes to the runner.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I sure hope the Boston Herald gets wind of this fraud Pitt is perpetrating and investigates into this Ty from New Orleans character.


94 posted on 12/29/2005 2:16:58 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Notice that Pitt speaks in 15-line paragraphs, and his interlocutor "Ty" speaks in 1-3 word grunts. ("Ty" is played by Lon Chaney Jr. as George in "Of Mice and Men.")

LOL!!! That sure is the truth! Methinks if there is a real bouncer named Ty, he might be inclined into giving Pitt a body slam for making him sound like a dolt.

95 posted on 12/29/2005 2:18:25 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: Choose Ye This Day; PJ-Comix

I'm just $10,000 away from challenging Pitt. Send money.


96 posted on 12/29/2005 2:20:43 PM PST by Charles Henrickson (Money orders are OK.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I BELIEEEVE, Scamdy!


97 posted on 12/29/2005 2:25:27 PM PST by Choose Ye This Day (Win the war. Confirm the judges. Cut the taxes. Control the spending. Secure the border.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

The Anecdote Too Far. Pitt erred in providing too detailed a description of Ty plus using those LONG quotes that he was magically able to reproduce sans aid of a tape recorder.


98 posted on 12/29/2005 2:26:10 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: confederacy of dunces

Happy New Year. Have a good and safe weekend!


99 posted on 12/29/2005 2:26:13 PM PST by Choose Ye This Day (Win the war. Confirm the judges. Cut the taxes. Control the spending. Secure the border.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Maybe Pitt was illegally wiretapping the conversation without a court order, and then transcribed his tape later.


100 posted on 12/29/2005 2:26:58 PM PST by Choose Ye This Day (Win the war. Confirm the judges. Cut the taxes. Control the spending. Secure the border.)
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