Posted on 05/06/2005 11:05:18 AM PDT by HairOfTheDog
In the week after First Lady Laura Bush's comedy routine at the White House press corps annual Correspondent's dinner, the uptight right is still Quaking.
Standing steadfast on their principle, the Upstanding withstood allegations that they were grandstanding about the first lady's comments. "Nonsense! We stand for something! Sorry if that doesn't sit well with you!" Their principle had only this to say: "uuuunnnnnnghh".
Though her routine was applauded by most, the unbothered majority was once more identifiable mostly by their clashing contrast with the outer fringes. Asked how they felt about being called a fringe group, the SpokesMan of "Something Very Wrong with That" Bart Hetero said "We don't wear fringe! Fringe is gay. This perversion is clearly a ploy of the homosexual fashion lobby."
The clergy at Our Lady of Perpetually Bunched Panties would say only that they were very uncomfortable with the whole thing.
United Church of the Righteously Indignant issued a strong statement against the content of the first lady's speech shortly before it began. "We are certain this event will be an outrage. Self-deprecating is clearly a sinful and immoral act."
Several members of the Church of the Delicate Sensibilities were treated for the vapors following the routine, and have been advised by their physicians not to comment.
The Depravity Archivists Council, a nonprofit group dedicated to fully exposing scantily clad innuendo in a world full of camouflaged nuance, has released an illustrated bulletin that explains in graphic detail the obscenity of the first lady's routine for those who don't grasp the full range of possible perverted interpretations.
Project Above It All refused to give an interview, but issued a statement: "None of us watched it. We don't participate in anything. We're boycotting." Asked to clarify what all they are boycotting, they simply answered "Well, as of now, you".
Speaking for the church of Most Cleansing Suffering, Sandy Vagina said "I guess what most chaffs me is that the first lady has further legitimized this idea that life is supposed to be fun".
Too late. The cat's out of the bag. :)
Bumping is my game, as I've stated before. ;)
It really jumped out at me: it reminded me of a Saturday night on the Coronado Strand beach when I was in high school ~ my date and I were imbibing a little adult beverage and foolin' around ~ you can guess the rest of story. *sigh*
Ya can't slip anything past a wily old curmudgeon. ;)
PS you have a great profile page! (we're almost neighbors)
Well, we're all glad you like to bump!
Bumping beats bouncing.
Romance on the beach is only good in Hallmark Cards!
That's true. We're glad you only bump and not bounce. :)
I've bounced down the road after a high speed get off and it's not much fun. ;)
I think anyone who got upset over that just has a dirty mind.
>:-} >:-} >:-}
Well, continue to bump only. :)
I'm getting too old to bounce ~ I don't heal as fast as I once did. ;)
Same here.
When are you going to get with program and start gestating my name-sake? My knitting needles are poised for action. ; )
Exactly! Some folks just don't get it.
Sad, isn't it?
I'm trying, but nothing's happening!
As they should! But there are plenty of 30 year old jokes some folks just don't get. Wanna hear one? Here we go...
---
Every Sunday, a little old lady placed $1,000 into the collection plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.
"Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you've put $1,000 in the collection plate every week for awhile now," he stated.
"Why yes," she replied. "Every week my son sends me money and what I don't need I give to the church."
The pastor replied, "That's wonderful. How much does he send you?"
The old lady answered, "Oh, $20,000 every week."
The pastor was amazed. "Your son must be very successful. What does he do for a living?"
"He's a veterinarian," she replied.
"That is a very honorable profession," the pastor replied. "Where does he practice?"
The old lady announced proudly, "Well, he has two cat houses in Las Vegas and one in Reno."
Thats ~baaaad~
LOL!
You have the wrong "New Series" in mind. The new series, as I understand it from my sources, is about Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi, with a cast of thousands from DU. It is called "Desperate Horses Asses."
That sounds like a pretty good series as well.
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