Posted on 04/02/2005 6:34:40 PM PST by Cincinnatus
Our church bell tolled 84 times. We draped the front door in purple and black. A framed action photo of the Holy Father was on display in the sanctuary, surrounded by the Easter flowers, propped between the new Paschal Candle and the baptismal font used only last week to welcome and sanctify the new members of our parish.
The mourning came twice: first yesterday, prematurely, when the false announcement came, then this afternoon when I was alone and Mary was teaching the new altar servers. An angel-weeping drizzle had been falling all day. I wiped some tears.
I turned on EWTN. That marvelous female voice with the British accent reading the text while appropriate photos and film from the life of John Paul the Great flashed on the screen:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the land.
Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be satisfied.
Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the clean of heart, for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.
Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when they insult you and persecute you and utter every kind of evil falsely against you because of me.
Rejoice and be glad, for your reward will be great in heaven.
Well, that did it for me. The pent-up emotion burst forth.
It was the second time this week I had seen those familiar words. The first had come from the written testimony of "Rachel Rose", Dawn Eden's mom, and the story of her theophany. (The whole story can be found in that peculiar backward blog way at http://www.dawneden.com/blogger.html.):
On the fifth day of reading The Great News, I came to Matthew 5, The Beatitudes. Standing on the Mount, Jesus looked out at the large gathering of people, and said: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” That got my attention. I had mourned for myself all my life. I read on: “Blessed are they who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.” (Well, didn’t I hunger and thirst? Didn’t I seek to be righteous, even though I was so far from it?) I kept reading: “Blessed are those who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness…” (I was persecuted, wasn’t I? But I wasn’t righteous. Maybe that didn’t pertain to me.) Then I read the last one: “And blessed are YOU [My name jumped off the page. He was talking to ME.], when they shall reproach you, and persecute you, and say every evil word against you, lying, on account of me. Rejoice and be glad, for great is your reward in heaven.” REJOICE and BE GLAD. I began to cry. I began to sob. I fell in love. Jesus, I don’t know you. But you are the first one to understand. You are the only person who ever lived who could know my pain. Jesus, I will follow you anywhere. I’ll go to church. How do I follow you? Show me, show me, show me… The tears flowed and washed me clean.
After communion I wandered into the family room (where families with rambunctious kids can watch Mass through a plate-glass window overlooking the sanctuary; it is usually occupied more by middle-aged to elderly people) and knelt with my old high school Polish-American buddy, Brother Alex. After Mass we reminisced briefly about our incredible and saintly Latin teacher, Sister Anna Roberta, CSJ, gone now to her eternal reward.
We looked out at the action photo of the young Pope, and the baptismal waters.
"What would Sister Anna say today?"
"I think," I said, "that she would first say, 'sunt lacrimae rerum' ["there are tears for things", from the Aeneid].
I paused.
"And then she would say, 'Fiat'."
Yes.
Fiat.
Fiat voluntas tua.
ping
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