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DUmmie FUnnies 12-30-04 ("How have you handled the past two months on a personal level?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | December 30, 2004 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 12/30/2004 5:22:54 PM PST by PJ-Comix

Remember the Robert DeNiro character, Max Cady, in the movie, Cape Fear? Well, right now, while reading this DUmmie THREAD titled, “Be honest: how have you handled the past two months on a personal level?” I feel just like that character when he was loudly laughing right behind a terrified family in a movie theater. The only difference is that instead of a movie theater, I am laughing LOUDLY at the Drama Queen pain the DUmmies are expressing over the election results. So, put on those really loud Hawaiian shirts, light up those cigars, and LAUGH at the self-pitying antics of the DUmmies. As usual, the pained DUmmie commentaries are in Bolshevik Red, while the… AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!…comments of your humble correspondent are in the [brackets]:

Be honest: how have you handled the past two months on a personal level? I said this in another thread: I haven't slept well for nearly two months now because of this election. I can barely eat, and I've lost ten pounds. I'm tense all the time, I move rapidly between depression and anger, and I feel like I'm isolated. Is anyone out there feeling like this? Or am I just taking this too hard? How has everyone else been since the election? What is helping you through it?

[< Max Cady> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! < /Max Cady>]

I know where your pounds went. I haven't slept well for nearly two months now because of this election. I eat all the time, and I've gained ten pounds. I'm tense all the time, I move rapidly between depression and anger, and I feel like I'm isolated.

[And I move rapidly between jubilation and elation, and I feel vindicated.]

No, I know where her pounds went. I've been the same way. All I want to do is eat and I've gained 12 pounds since the week before the election.

[NEWSFLASH!!! The election has been over for nearly 2 months. It is safe now to lift your face from that bag of marshmallows.]

I believe that our country will overtly become fascist and to live in a society like that is not in my vocabulary. I have two teenaged sons, a business and a very comfortable home, and am torn about shedding my "stuff" and relocating, resisting (and possibly spend my years meditating in a camp somewhere), or will I not have the courage and become like those in Nazi Germany just accepting?

[Just to feed into this DUmmie’s paranoia, they should have a French voice making announcement over a loudspeaker on Inauguration Day in D.C.. Then, ala Casablanca, the French voice is replaced by a German voice making an announcement starting with “ACHTUNG!”]

I am continually nervous and frightened. I grew up in a democracy, and living under a dictatorship is something I never mentally prepared for. My heart races, my hands shake, my feet sweat, and I wake up many times in the night. It doesn't seem to get better over time, although the depression is gradually replaced by anger and fear.

[Have you caught jock itch yet?]

I feel like a German of the '30's. I wince and grimly look around me and feel... very uncomfortable. It's hard to focus on work, I feel like our whole paradigm is about to change.

[Paradigms SHIFT, not change. Get your DUmmie talking points right.]

When I saw the election turn during the night of Nov 2 & 3, I kind of went into shock. When I woke up the next morning and my husband told me Kerry just conceded, I felt like my guts had been ripped out. I'm NOT OVER IT!! And I never will be. But I know it's going to get a whole lot worse for our country before this nightmare is over. I feel like I've always been "married" to America, and then find out this "spouse" is a serial killer/rapist, on hard drugs, with a huge gambling problem that just wiped us out, before he ran off with my children into hiding, and his brother, the judge, just stuck me with child support payments that I can't pay, and I may go to jail if I don't come up with the money, which I can't, because I lost my job. << I know that sounds pretty melodramatic; but all those feelings of betrayal, desperation, injustice, hopelessness, outrage, insanity, loss, grief.... I feel them all at the same time.

[< Max Cady> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! < /Max Cady>]

I can't stand to get up in the morning without checking DU. I abandon my own message board to wait here for news. My fingernails - GONE. I forego make-up to check DU before I leave the house. Dishes tend to pile up for a couple of days now. I feel hopeless, disgusted, angry, motivated all at once. I email politicians and media people all friggin' day. My online friends are sick of hearing me talk about this stuff. I sleep until I can't sleep anymore, but still wake up too early. I am frustrated because people don't understand the magnitude of this or its importance. They don't know, and they don't want to know. I finally crumbled and cried (can't remember what development set me off; it was about 2 weeks ago).

[Somehow I get the feeling you WON’T be a New Year’s Eve Life of the Party person.]

And I am angry. I am angry that we are not taking to the streets like they did in Russia. I am angry that we do idiotic things--like standing in front on an empty house--when we should be taking our country back. Why are our leaders so ineffective?

[Don’t be so down on yourself. That freezing in front of Kerry’s empty townhouse bit was GREAT comedy relief!]

Nervous, irritable....a bit withdrawn, smoking too much, weird sleep patterns. I think I've lost weight; I know I'm vitamin-deficient in all sorts of ways, not much appetite. I know I don't laugh as easily as I did before the election. I know I'm not taking as much pleasure in fun silly things as I used to. Likeminded people help. The 'Return of the King' EE helps; oddly enough, so does exquisitely depressing music like Leonard Cohen and Nick Drake and Richard Thompson. (And sometimes 'Dr. Strangelove...' and Sabbath's 'War Pigs') Drafting endless letters to various political figures (two of which have actually gotten e-mailed) seems to briefly alleviate the symptoms.

[< Max Cady> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! < /Max Cady>]

It's been hard, frankly. I get a white hot surge of rage sometimes. What the hell is wrong with this country anyway? I live in Southern California. People in the red states hate us. They've got political power, thanks to the effing Electoral College. I've got relatives in Texas who are laughing up their effing sleeves. Where the hell are all the Democratic leaders? We gotta DO something about this. This sucks.

[Have you considered a Prozac overdose?]

I feel like I'm in the f*cking Twilight Zone. There is this big smelly Elephant sitting in the corner of my house but I can only talk about it with a few people. I think realizing the major media outlets have completely gone to the dark side is what really hit me hardest. I was a basket case for the first couple of weeks after the election - little sleep, distracted and feeling like I was going nuts, but since then I've learned to deal with this new bizarre reality I find myself in. Thank god I found DU. My wife has also helped calm me down a bit. I've never been one for conspiracy theories and this election fraud issue has always just seemed like elementary connect the dots - which is why seeing so many people in denial of it just boggles my mind.

[That big smelly Elephant sitting in your house just left one hell of a big pet deposit on your floor.]

dazed and confused...starved for the truth...angry, passionate, patriotic, fearful,determined, anxious and ready to fight like hell for the dignity and integrity of our vote! So much to deal with...it has truly been one hell of a ride...

[< Max Cady> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! < /Max Cady>]

I REALLY needed Kerry to win the elction, for me personally as well as for the country and the world. I hoped that getting GWB out of office would free me so that I could move on with my life. I live alone and have isolated myself terribly. I have been utterly unable to work or do anything to either be productive or make any money for over 2 years now. I have been hanging out in places where I sometimes/often see no hope for myself.

[Those heroin shooting galleries do tend to have that effect on you.]

Depression, preoccupation, nightmares, distraction, apathy, misery, hopelessness, insomnia, poor eating habits, social avoidance, repeated thoughts of expatriation and various and sundry other personal upsets.

[So where’s the downside for you?]

i am pissed though at being called idiotic yesterday on TV by Novak. if you missed crossfire, he called "us" in other words believers idiots. and said the recount is over and so it the election - and we are all looking for Kerry to come to our rescue. its things like that that bother me. that make me think every word we type is being looked at. all of this will be repeated by some moron on a freeper board. and taken out of context. makes me crazy.

[Hee! Hee! And may I place your name on the DUFU Ping List, DUmmie roenyc?]

I will never give up! Yes, I've put on weight, I'm drinking heavily and smoking pot when I can find it. I'm on antidepressants and stomache medicine. I vary between anger, sadness, and a numbness that pervades my soul. I have 2 Kerry, 2 DU, a Bush Knew, a What Mandate?, and a Don't blame me, I voted for Kerry bumper stickers on my car and I will continue to taunt the ignorant Bush voters with their stupidity and remind them of their responsibility for the next 4 years of fiasco at every opportunity.

[Take another hit on that pot and INHALE deeply.]

must we air our dirty laundry to the freepers can't this be posted in the lounge, where the freeps might not venture?

[You must! You must!]

I try to tell people that this election was not fair & free....They say.."I did not here this on the news" .Then I tell them the news is owned by corporations and its in there best interest to keep the king in power bla bla bla .....they ask were is John Kerry? I keep screaming but no one wants to here me , they tell me to GET OVER IT .....I know in my heart I'm not nuts and neither are the rest of us who are convinced of the fraud . Yet most people have no idea what happened and how the election system is set up. For many you vote, they count votes then there's a winner. I really think ignorance would be bliss..once you learn the facts about this its hard not to be totally effected.

[< Max Cady> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! < /Max Cady>]

it didn't sink in until the electors were certified. i was sure that the truth would set us free, and gulped down the truth every day here at du. i was sure we would be saved. but, once those electors were certified, it sank in. just in time for christmas. i had a horrible holiday, and took the family down with me. i am so torn. i fight within myself all the time to keep my sense of self. when you are the mom of 5 kids, that is already hard. but i have taken the misdeeds of the * administration personally. this is my country, and it feels like my kids have grown up to be axe murderers. either this is my country, and it is my duty to be a part of how it acts, or it is not my country any more. lose, lose.

[“I BELIEVE that John Kerry will be inaugurated on Jan. 20!!!”]

I was on the freeway on my way to work thinking Kerry wouldn't concede until ALL the votes were counted, my sister calls me and said he conceded. I was so upset I turned around and didn't go to work that day. All I could do was cry for the next few days. Then I got very angry at Kerry and Democrats, America and our political system. I withdrew from all action committees, TrueMajority, Moveon.org, etc. I decided that I would not do anything political ever again.

[< Max Cady> AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! < /Max Cady>]

Not going out. No movies. Spending very little money. Feeling like the bad guys are winning and the Fundies are on a rampage. Playing video games - World of Warcraft is very immersive and I don't think about the Real World. Feeling helpless and wishing there was something more substantial I could do other than give money to places. Wondering where do we go from here. No matter what happens it will not turn out well - at least for some time.

[Perhaps you should consider posting to one of those dopey “I BELIEVE!!!” threads.]

. Feeling powerless SUCKS. I haven't been able to concentrate since the campaign got going. Every time I settle down and try to get some work done, there's a voice in the back of my head, saying "That criminal is still in the white house, whattaya gonna do about it?" and "He's going to destroy SS and you're mom's gonna be moving in with you," and "How can we prove fraud, can it be proven, how can you relax if it happened?"

[It sounds like the Son of Sam is talking to you.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies
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To: PJ-Comix
I Blog BooksI am angry that we do idiotic things--like standing in front on an empty house...

No one ever told this DUmmie that the "royal we" should be capitalized? Or is s/he one of the ONLY TWO people who actually pulled this idiotic vigil?

...Oh, poor, pitiful s/he...
21 posted on 12/30/2004 5:39:31 PM PST by dr_pat (the boys i mean are not refined, they shake the mountains when they dance!)
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To: timpad
Thanks, PJ and be careful around the Latinas. If they wear you out, we might have to go "over there" ourselves for our laughs. We'd rather entrust it to a careful professional like you.

My ex-wife is a latina. Blood thirstiest bitch I have ever seen in my life. She served as an MP in Desert Storm and warped the barrel on a .50 firing it nonstop in the direction of a single shot fired her way.

22 posted on 12/30/2004 5:40:40 PM PST by speed_addiction (Ninja's last words, "Hey guys. Watch me just flip out on that big dude over there!")
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To: PJ-Comix

Heeeeeeere's GEORGIE!!!


23 posted on 12/30/2004 5:42:24 PM PST by Dont Mention the War (W2: Coming January 20, 2005! Be There!)
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To: dr_pat

I live in Boston--looked like two, though there may have been UP TO SIX!!!!!!! at one point. The locals, all Dems I'm sure, were pretty annoyed with them hanging out while people were trying to get by on a narrow, snowy sidewalk.


24 posted on 12/30/2004 5:42:42 PM PST by Darkwolf377 (Mobius Consistency Strip: I was for George W. Bush before I was for him.)
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To: Darkwolf377
These people are freakin out to lunch. I especially like the ones who have sought refuge in pot and video games, and who haven't worked in two years. Way to refute that "Liberals are stoners who don't work" cliche!
You are so mean.... don't you realize... they can't be expected to WORK... They're depressed! Gore lost and sKerry lost BIG TIME (unless you are into the conspiracy theory du jour).

And you expect them to get out of BED everyday and go to WORK!

There isn't any pot at work! 420, dude!

Fascist!

//sarcasm

25 posted on 12/30/2004 5:45:02 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (Because I fly, I envy no (wo)man on earth. - Anon)
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To: PJ-Comix

PJ? Not a single reference to the suicide hotline number???

That's quite an oversight!


26 posted on 12/30/2004 5:45:39 PM PST by Incorrigible (immanentizing the eschaton)
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To: dr_pat
No one ever told this DUmmie that the "royal we" should be capitalized? Or is s/he one of the ONLY TWO people who actually pulled this idiotic vigil?

Now now, don't underestimate their raw power. The Boston Globe specifically counted six people there!

27 posted on 12/30/2004 5:45:52 PM PST by Dont Mention the War (W2: Coming January 20, 2005! Be There!)
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To: speed_addiction

I've been around a few .50's, but that's a new one. How many rounds (est.) did she put through it? Did she stop before she off'd the weapon, or worse?


28 posted on 12/30/2004 5:46:13 PM PST by timpad (The Wizard Tim - Keeper of the Holy Hand Grenade, Finder of Obscurata)
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To: PJ-Comix

"My online friends are sick of hearing me talk about this stuff."



Oh please, don't sell yourself short. Somebody loves hearing you talk about this stuff.


29 posted on 12/30/2004 5:46:28 PM PST by cripplecreek (you tell em i'm commin.... and hells commin with me.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

I suggest we tell all these DUmmies that a "most massive" amount of THAI stick is available in the flood ravaged areas, and they should head over there, 'cause that's hwo they're paying relief workers. That'll give 'em a taste of how life is in other, non-Fascist countries, and we'll see how fast they run back here.


30 posted on 12/30/2004 5:47:25 PM PST by Darkwolf377 (Mobius Consistency Strip: I was for George W. Bush before I was for him.)
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To: PJ-Comix

I read this over at DUh today. All I could do was giggle and think it might be your next DUFU. When it comes right down to it, so many threads so little bandwidth. Don't let those Latinas be too rough with you tomorrow night. We will be needing our DUFU fix on NYDay.


31 posted on 12/30/2004 5:50:24 PM PST by Ditter
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To: speed_addiction; PJ-Comix

32 posted on 12/30/2004 5:51:35 PM PST by hipaatwo
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To: Darkwolf377

Thanks... you made me think of the Human Shields for a moment. What a great part of American History that was...

We could tell the Human Sheilds that they are needed there and maybe they could stand in front of the waves and .... sorry, laughing too hard to continue.


33 posted on 12/30/2004 5:52:00 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (Because I fly, I envy no (wo)man on earth. - Anon)
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To: fastattacksailor

That should tell them something when friends and family want them to quit, already.


34 posted on 12/30/2004 5:52:56 PM PST by beckysueb (God bless America and President Bush.)
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To: PJ-Comix
"must we air our dirty laundry to the freepers can't this be posted in the lounge, where the freeps might not venture?"

BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAA! You're not safe anywhere DUmmies, the Freepers venture everywhere in your DUmpster (and carefully shower after.)

Everytime I start to feel sorry for the miserable little toadies, you post one of their better threads that makes me laugh so loud I scare my dogs!

35 posted on 12/30/2004 5:54:21 PM PST by penowa
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To: dr_pat

Does anyone know how many actually showed up?


36 posted on 12/30/2004 5:54:38 PM PST by beckysueb (God bless America and President Bush.)
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To: dansangel
This must be what it's like to be a fly on the wall during a Boca Raton shrink session with a *victim* of P.E.S.T.

One of the guys down there treating the 'victims' had success with some.

He hypnotized them.
Douglas Schooler, a Boca Raton psychologist who treated the Kerry partisans with intense hypnotherapy after they proved unable to handle the reality of losing to Bush,
Psychologist: Ohio recount relieves traumatized Kerry supporters

Mortals: Never doubt the shrewd brilliance of The Rove.
37 posted on 12/30/2004 5:55:54 PM PST by Mike Fieschko (A thunder of jets in an open sky ... a streak of grey ... and a cheerful 'Hi!')
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To: Darkwolf377
At least we know Hillary ain't posting on DU.

If that was Micheal Moore he's only got about 200 more to go... Bush has helped him already!

38 posted on 12/30/2004 5:56:24 PM PST by 69ConvertibleFirebird (Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.)
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To: beckysueb

Stories vary from 2 - 6.

I would lean more towards the two - and pedestrian traffic at the corner adding the additional four at one point - when the NYTimes took their count.


39 posted on 12/30/2004 5:56:40 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (Because I fly, I envy no (wo)man on earth. - Anon)
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To: Dont Mention the War; Darkwolf377
I Blog Books...don't underestimate their raw power. The Boston Globe specifically counted six people there!

And how many of those were BG reporters, hmmm? The photo I saw showed TWO, (count 'em) TWO, protestors huddled close together to stay warm. I suspect if there had been 2 to 3 others there to include in the picture, they would have run with that photo instead.
40 posted on 12/30/2004 5:57:46 PM PST by dr_pat (the boys i mean are not refined, they shake the mountains when they dance!)
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