DUmmie FUnnies 11-07-04 (The Ghost Of DUmmie Gloat Past)

Various DUmmies and Assorted MOrons | November 7, 2004 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

[PJ-Comix]

Let us take a walk down memory lane to last Tuesday. Just 6 days ago and yet an eternity as far as the DUmmies are concerned. Their hopes were still high as we begin this tragic drama. To present this play in all its epic glory I relied on several DUmmie threads for source material starting out with this DUmmie THREAD. As we can see, the DUmmies have learned nothing from Terry McAwful. The lesson being that first you must enjoy a success BEFORE you can gloat, NOT the other way around as McAwful did in 2002 when he savored the defeat of Jeb Bush about a week before that landslide election returning Jeb to the Florida governorship. Uh-Oh! The play is about to begin. Return to your seats! HUSH! I urge you to maintain silence! The curtains are opening on our opening scene…..It is exactly 3:19 PM when DUmmie messenger nine30 brings tidings of great jubilation:

Exit polls snapshot (2:00 pm) Not Bad !!

[Hee! Hee! The DUmmie Coyote has just received a package from the Acme Exit Poll Co..]

Not bad? F*cking excellent. But it is still early.

[It is early but most Dummies are already celebrating Kerry’s great victory. Susan Estrich is popping the champagne bottles.]

Correct......waaaay too early to feel good or bad.

[But as we shall see, most DUmmies are already in a deluded frenzy of sheer joy. The END of the Evil Bush Regime is in sight!]

Hey - I'm just trying to enjoy the last few hours of pure hope!

[Yes DUmmie, yes! Enjoy your last few hours of happiness before the Republican Darkness sets in.]

I'm trying not to get excited about this....I know these polls are unreliable, but I want to let my energy out. Guess I'll wait for the election party I'm going to tonight.

[The wait will be much longer than you ever expected, my little DUmmie.]

This is fantastic--there's no reason to think this is wrong given Harris and Zogby state-by-state predictions. If Kerry takes Mich, Ohio, Penn, Florida, Wis, and Minn, as he's doing here, it's over. Bush is toast. Free at last, free at last, thank God a'mighty, we're free at last!

[WHEEEE!!! FREEEE!!!! CELEBRATE! CELEBRATE OUR GREAT VICTORY!!!!]

Wonderful news!

[Yes, isn’t it just the BEST news ever! Oh, I just want to hug each and every DUmmie out of happiness!]

OH and FL too close for my liking but overall, good news.

[Oh stop worrying you silly thing. The exit polls are always right. Now enjoy the champagne. WHEEEEE!!!!!]

Randi Rhodes very positive about Florida. As long as votes are counted. And she's not usually a font of positivity!

[OH! WELL! If Randi Rhodes is positive about Florida then the Sunshine State is IN THE BAG!!! Another round of Champagne for all!]

That's 312 electoral votes!!!!!!!!!!!

[KERRY WINS!!! MORE CHAMPAGNE! WHEEEEE!!!!!]

Stop this! No exit polls here, I remember seeing. RIGHT?

[True. Exit poll results were forbidden here on the DUmmie site but since Kerry is effectively the winner we might as well post them.]

Skinner posted that it was ok now.

[WHOOOPPPEEEEEEE!!!! Let us now exult in our victory as decided by the exit polls!!!]

I so glad they are allowed now.

[Me too! Those Acme Co. Exit Polls will certainly inspire me to GLOAT at the rightwing Freepers!!! (We now switch to another DUmmie THREAD entitled “Inbreds over at Freeperland Worried About Us Making Fun of Them.”)]

Inbreds over at Freeperland Worried About Us Making Fun of Them. LOL! What a bunch of puss-pusses. Should we play nice????? “Let's Not Encourage DUmmie Gloating”

[Actually let’s do encourage DUmmie Gloating since it will be FUN to read AFTER the election.]

They forgot how they treated us in 2002. Karma is a bitch.

[Yeah, isn’t it though?]

Don't worry. they'll start eating their own soon enough. We'll be too busy partying are asses off to care.

[Hee! Hee! Little do the DUmmies know it will be a FUNERAL party.]

2002 was an awful, awful night. Tonight is going to be our victory. The Democratic majority will finally be heard. It's our dawn, and the freepers' sunset.

[Let me pause here and SAVOR reading that over and over and over again.]

I remember also what goes around, comes around

[You must have watched a lot of “Road Runner” cartoons because it is about to come back around AGAIN to the DUmmie Coyote.]

I'm not going to rub it in. I would much rather join Kerry in uniting this country and working to insure that those wing-nut so called christian evangelical, homophobic, inbred, facist pigs, NEVER! and I mean NEVER enjoy a voice of power in this country again. Let 'em go to Guam for all I care. Their hate and vitriol are not good for anything but tearing down. Let 'em wallow in their own feces. Me, I'm raising a glass of champagne IF, and I mean IF this goes our way.

[That’s a might big IF. But go ahead and slosh down that champagne, DUmmie. Enjoy the illusional victory while you can.]

Don't gloat---just be patient. don't count your chickens until they hatch

[Go ahead and count them. Most other DUmmies are already counting their chickens and gloating.]

Hey, Freeps ... don't listen to the dude. It is important to express your feelings ... let it out. Don't let the poison of despair build up to toxic levels within your limited psyches. Release your pain. Its good for ya. And, besides, we really are enjoying the show!

[And so are we over here at the DUmmie FUnnies! So are we!!!]

I can't wait to out myself over there after Kerry wins!!It's going to be fun!

[We’re waiting and waiting and waiting. Didn’t you say you would out yourself after Kerry wins? We’re waiting.]

Let's pound the crybaby losers into the dirt until Jan 20, and THEN ease up and let good ol' President Kerry unite us! But until then...let's be MERCILESS!

bwa ha ha ha ha!

[bwa ha ha ha ha!]

Hey Freeper Lurkers ...your boy is going down, losers!

[Sniff! Your gloating is gonna make me cwy!]

Yeah. Payback's a motherf**ker, right?

[RIIIGGHHTTTT!!!]

I feel no sorrow for these assholes. They should be worried.

[I’m already crapping in my pants in worry over the impending Kerry victory as predicted by the Acme Exit Poll Co….. And now let’s fast forward just a few hours to exactly 10:05 PM on election night and note how the gloating has dissipated to be replaced by a desultory tone on this downbeat THREAD as the DUmmie Coyote’s Acme Exit Poll Co. package blows up in his face and he finds himself foiled ONCE AGAIN by Reality’s Roadrunner.]

If Bush wins , there definitely is no God. Before the last Presidential election , I said that I would no longer believe in God if Bush won , I just knew he was evil . Anyway , Bush won , but despite my utterances , I still believed in God because Gore really won. Now if Bush wins this time , with nearly 80% of the world praying for John Kerry to win , how can there be a God? This may sound melodramatic , but it's what I feel. What do others think ?

[BEEP! BEEP! That’s what I think.]

[PJ-Comix]

I hope you enjoyed this special DUmmie FUnnies Election Night Retrospective. Let me know if you wish to be placed on the PING List so you can be updated with future DUmmie FUnnies editions.

[PJ-Comix]

PING!

[ChefKeith]

If Bush wins , there definitely is no God. Before the last Presidential election , I said that I would no longer believe in God if Bush won , I just knew he was evil . Anyway , Bush won , but despite my utterances , I still believed in God because Gore really won. Now if Bush wins this time , with nearly 80% of the world praying for John Kerry to win , how can there be a God? This may sound melodramatic , but it's what I feel. What do others think ?

God always answers Prayer- but sometimes the answer is NO

[Freepdonia]

2002 was an awful, awful night. Tonight is going to be our victory. The Democratic majority will finally be heard. It's our dawn, and the freepers' sunset.

[Let me pause here and SAVOR reading that over and over and over again.]

I think I can savor reading that over and over for the next four years. :-)

[Repub4bush]

ME TOO! AHHHHH.........the sweet smell of victory, and security, knowing the adults are still in charge for 4 more years!!!!!!!!!

[vbmoneyspender]

That was great. DU Lurkers unmask yourselves and repeat after me in red state colors -- Thank You Sir. May I Please Have Another?

[Gabz]

There is just too much here to comment upon.........

I'll just leave it with..........I feel sorry for them.

[investigateworld]

Excellent, don't stop.

[Loopy Picklefink]

PJ...I didn't read this whole thread, but it looks like there might be some good material on it.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=102&topic_id=959697

[bitt]

'I can't wait to out myself over there after Kerry wins!!It's going to be fun! '

hard to choose which 3 day wonder this one was...

we certainly went down on the troll-o-meter...

thanks, PJ!!

[Yardstick]

They forgot how they treated us in 2002. Karma is a bitch.

[Yeah, isn’t it though?]

LOL -- great stuff.

[daguberment]

OH! WELL! If Randi Rhodes is positive about Florida then the Sunshine State is IN THE BAG!!!

Randi Rhodes, hehehehe. I've been listening to my local Err America (the audio equiv of DUmmy Land) and it's a hoot. They are very much certain that aaallll the voting machines (but particularly the Diebold variety) were running code written by Karl Rove himself. They just can't accept defeat.

I challenge any Freeper to spend one hour listening to Err America while simultaneously navigating DU. Your head will explode.

[snarkytart]

>>Yeah. Payback's a motherf**ker, right?<<

LOL

yep sure is isn't it!!

[MaeWest]

This just gives me a case of the warm fuzzies.

[ml1954]

Don't worry. they'll start eating their own soon enough.

Since it is they who will soon start eating their own, imagine the meal they can make of Michael Moore. Seconds for everyone.

[Ditter]

This is just excellent. I think I'll print some DUmmie FUnnies up and keep them to read on days when I need a chuckle. Thanks PJ.

[Ditter]

lookie here 8~)

[MaeWest]

...imagine the meal they can make of Michael Moore. Seconds for everyone.

LOL. And S'mores for dessert.

[AJS]

BTW... what the 'el happened to ol Susan Ostrich??? Anyone know? She licking wounds of her what? 5th lost campaign?

[The Hollywood Conservative]

There really is no word to express the glee I feel watching them gloat prematurely...


I now know there is a God... and Pride goeth before a fall...