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EXCECUTIVE JOB OPENING PUBLISHED IN AL-JAZEERA
DFU
| 4-2004
| dfu
Posted on 04/17/2004 9:55:56 PM PDT by doug from upland
EXECUTIVE POSITION
A well known Middle East organization is looking for a dedicated, self-motivated, experienced executive to head its Middle East operations. Compensation in the high six figures, U.S. dollars. Will have car allowance, stock options, health plan, and substantial additional perks, including use of desirable female camel.
Candidate must be Muslim and demonstrate intense hatred of Jews. Must look good in bed sheet and towel. Must know how to use small and medium caliber weapons. Smelling better than a goat is helpful.
Job duties consist of planning operations, bomb making, hostage negotiations, appearances on television and radio, handling contributions to the DNC, and recruiting virgin-seeking young men who are willing to explode.
It is absolutely essential that the candidate be limber enough to quickly exit a vehicle when hearing the word “incoming.”
Submit resume to yasser@hamas.org
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS:
To: doug from upland
2
posted on
04/17/2004 9:57:57 PM PDT
by
Diogenesis
(We do what we are meant to do)
To: doug from upland
*LOL* Here's another one that I almost thought was real but thankfully I had enough coffeet today.
3
posted on
04/17/2004 9:58:30 PM PDT
by
cyborg
To: doug from upland
One of the funniest yet!
4
posted on
04/17/2004 9:58:51 PM PDT
by
AZamericonnie
(Proud member of the VRWC division of the RAS)
To: doug from upland
When is this outsourcing going to stop?
5
posted on
04/17/2004 10:00:22 PM PDT
by
Oorang
( When all else fails, simply revel in the absurdity of it all.)
To: doug from upland
You forgot to add that there will be NO TELECOMMUTING ACCEPTED.
6
posted on
04/17/2004 10:00:44 PM PDT
by
Pukin Dog
(Sans Reproache, but not quite worthy of Condi Rice.)
To: doug from upland
Those people in the Hamas Human Resources Department are quick!
7
posted on
04/17/2004 10:01:10 PM PDT
by
GeronL
(I wore my chair out FReeping. Now I use a plastic lawn chair.)
To: Pukin Dog
I forgot ---- Name will not be publicly revealed. We promise.
8
posted on
04/17/2004 10:02:35 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Don't wait until it is too late to stop Hillary -- do something today!)
To: doug from upland
This slug should apply.
9
posted on
04/17/2004 10:05:40 PM PDT
by
South40
(Amnesty for ILLEGALS is a slap in the face to the USBP!)
To: doug from upland
I forgot ---- Name will not be publicly revealed. We promise. I'd bet milk has a longer shelf life than that promise. You should have added a blurb about pre-planned burial and choice of 72 virgins. On the other hand, if they're still virgin in that culture, they must be uglier than most of the more boring sins.
10
posted on
04/17/2004 10:08:55 PM PDT
by
JackelopeBreeder
(Proud to be a loco gringo armed vigilante terrorist cucaracha!)
To: doug from upland
Cutting.
Most topical.
And FUNNY AS ALL HELL!
11
posted on
04/18/2004 12:00:54 AM PDT
by
KangarooJacqui
(Hamas - rest in pieces.)
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