Posted on 02/15/2023 7:13:06 AM PST by algore
CAPE CORAL, Fla. — Sometimes the situation just calls for a cold one.
Just before midnight on February 8th, Lee County Sheriff’s deputies drove North on Chiquita Boulevard. As they approached Gleason Parkway, something caught their eye. A black Mercedes-Benz parked in the opposite lane.
The vehicle was just sitting there. Lights on. With no traffic causing the stoppage. Deputies crept behind the car, flicked on their flashing lights, and tried to determine if the vehicle might have been abandoned.
As they approached the vehicle, they found 40-year-old Michael Sereda sitting alone in the passenger seat.
Beer cans littered the vehicle’s floor and lined the front cup holders. 24-packs of Michelob Ultra and Bud Light were torn into and drained as casualties were visibly scattered at Sereda’s feet.
Deputies attempted to begin a line of dialogue, but according to the Arrest Report, Sereda was “unable to speak” due to his level of intoxication. Now in need of support, Cape Coral Police’s assistance was requested, and the deputy waited for backup.
Then came the unmistakable sound. kr-Pop-tss-SSS.
In plain view of deputies, Sereda reached into the pile of fallen aluminum soldiers and pulled out a hidden treasure. An unopened beer.
Deputies, deciding Sereda had clearly reached his limit, declared it was the last call and reached out to remove the hoppy beverage. At the risk of spilling his beer, Sereda began to fight back until deputies were able to remove him from the vehicle.
Even the security of handcuffs did little to dispel Sereda’s growing aggressions. At one point, deputies used their Taser to subdue the agitated opponent, but it had “zero effect” when striking Sereda’s back. Deputies resorted to physically restraining Sereda until their support came.
With the situation under control, Sereda was taken to a Lee County hospital after sustaining scratches and scrapes during the altercation. He was then taken into custody and brought to the Lee County Jail.
The most Florida thing, ever.
Save the beer!
Half the cars I pass reek of Marijuana. I see people smoke it openly in the street. Never see a story about that.
Heard recently that people cited for drunk driving had, on average, gotten away with it 600+ times without being caught.
Honest, your honor, this is the first time I’ve ever done this and I promise I’ll never do it again!!!
At least they are smart enough to not be wearing masks..
I did this once right after I tossed a live alligator through a drive through window.
But people on marijuana tend to drive slower, they are even kind enough to roll down the window and shout “I’m Changing Lanes!”
Who knows if the weed even contains delta 8? which makes it illegal?
We distribute all kinds of stuff that looks just like a cigarette, reeks like refer, but it not illegal because of its’s chemical makeup. Must drive cops crazy.
Florida Man keyword added.
But sometimes they wait for the stop sign to turn green
If he were black this would be front-page news as as officers assaults innocent motorist.
I hope he at least had the decency to offer the police officer a beer also.
The headline would read “ man cracks open malt liquor “
LOL!
Back in the 1970s, my dad used to drive on long trips with a beer between his legs. But that was a different time. We used to ride in the bed of pickup trucks back then too.
One of my brothers-in-law used to drive around with a cooler full of beer. I don’t recall him ever being stopped.
Alcoholism is a terrible thing
Yes it is. Any addiction takes a toll.
Couple of hillbillies ridi g around drinking. One sees a cop and freaks. The driver however says “relax yell, I’ve got this. Quick peel the labels off the bottles careful like”
They peel labels off
Driver says “now lap them and stick them to your foreheads” friends look at him, but comply.
Cops pulls up beside vehicle, tells driver to pull over, which he does
Cops gets out and looks in the vehicle and says “I’m gonna a take a wild guess here znd say that maybe you boys been drinkin tonight?”
Driver raises his right hand up as if to swear, and says “no sir officer, we don’t drink anymore, honest”
Then he points to the labels and says
“Look, we’re on the patch”
Officer drives away sad that he couldn’t arrest them, having been defeated by the beer patch.
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