Who left the dimensional door open? - Thread 031

Online News ^ | 1/29/2002 | Unknown

[grannie9]

To our Bullfighting Capt'n again..;)

He's always good for a laugh... ;)

[lodwick]

[grannie9]

I love this one.. ;)

I watched the show last night.. (was it last night?...whenever..) and it so grosses me out.. Look at the guys eyes that says, "cut." Sooo funny... lol

[lodwick]

[grannie9]

Look who I found in duct tape...

[lodwick]

Hi Al!

How's it going with the palapateria? He should have put that puppy to bed by now and moved on to manatee training or something.

[grannie9]

LOL.. I"ll have to take a progress report pic.. He's getting there.. ;)

It will probably be held together with Duct Tape.. Especially after the first big blow..

[Darksheare]

Umm... only to get the voices out of your head.
I seem to have lost all my duct tape though.
Not sure where it all went to.
Or who it hopped away on.
I'm gonna have to track down the agentette and my rack. They both seem to have disappeared.

[Darksheare]

A thread, just for we insane types...
Discussion and such.
Beware of posts #11 and 12.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/840779/posts?page=11

[Sundog]

Could I get a hot towel and a mineral water?

My Colorado Vacation just came through. I had a hunch to call and got 2 nights resevations at the hot springs lodge, someone had just cancelled because they've been sold out for weeks. Also check out the hotel next door, Teddy Rosevelt's "Western White House" where the story of the Teddy Bear was born.

Hot Springs Lodge...Hotel Colorado

Now I have something to look forward to 15th and 16th.

[lodwick]

Thoughts of Hershel Chicowitz

I gotta' tell you, the Iraq thing really has me on edge. And if it has me on edge, imagine what it must be doing to the people in charge! Do we have to spend $60 billion and kill thousands of soldiers and innocent civilians to get rid of this guy. Or should we just declare victory, pick up our deadly toys and go home?

Or... is there another way to deal with this?

The Bush administration appears to be willing to consider another option. Supposedly, a gutsy Saudi Arabian diplomat has gone to Baghdad to try to talk Saddam Hussein into bailing out... cashing in his billions of ill-gotten gold, packing up his things and his family, and going into exile.

So... it looks like we got ourselves a deal, bobba-louie!

The problem is... where would he go? If he goes anywhere in the Middle East, Israel's Mossad would eventually find him and do what 400 trillion dollars of American military power could not. Now, I would not be at all opposed to that. But surely Saddam is as aware of that reality as I am. So, that's not gonna' fly.

I suppose we could send him to Antarctica, Bayonne, New Jersey, or some other desolate place. But something just does not sit right with me about that. Besides, it would be an insult to the good folks of Bayonne. So, it is a problem that had been simmering on the back burner, and continued to concern me.

Then, over the weekend I saw a seemingly unrelated story that provided me with an idea. "Entertainment This Weekend" reported that Michael Jackson is looking for a new home. He apparently rejected a $14 million dollar mansion in Palm Beach - not enough space. Nonetheless, he is restless and on the hunt.

Well, during a commercial break, it hit me like a thunderbolt: Michael Jackson for Saddam Hussein.

That's right. Let's trade Michael Jackson and his family for Saddam Hussein and his. We'll send Michael Jackson, his kids... his entire entourage, to live in Saddam's soon-to-be-abandoned - or destroyed palaces. Surely there is enough room there for Michael to entertain himself, Prince Michael, and all the little Jacksonettes. In return, Saddam and his clan can live out their lives on Jackson's Neverland Ranch. You know, it'll be sort of like the Beverly Hillbillies of the 21st century.

Neverland is Michael Jackson's private haven in the beautiful California valley of Santa Ynez, about 75 miles from Santa Barbara. Named for Michael's favorite character's base camp, Neverland is a full scale amusement park with Ferris wheel, bumper cars and the Sea Dragon. It's also a colorful park with thousands of flowers, statues, forests and lakes. In the zoo you'll find monkeys, lions, white tigers, elephants and cats. There is also an private film theater and, of course, Michael's palatial house.

Now, I know what all of you are thinking: "Come on, this will never work!"

But think about it... it is a perfect match. They are both embarrassing freaks of nature, living in their own bizarre fantasy worlds, are they not? Why, I'll bet that neither of them would even know the difference.

In Iraq, Michael would look positively white! No more ugly, plastic surgery. He doesn't like the press he is getting? Shucks, he can simply have them beheaded. Nothing out of the ordinary in Baghdad.

He and his family will have all the palaces and toys he could ever imagine... enough to last a lifetime.

Most of the Iraqi citizens, I imagine, have never heard of him. So instead of having to pull up new material from a well that ran dry a decade ago, Michael can recycle all his stuff from the 70s and 80s. He can teach the people all about the English language and American customs.

[acnielsen guy]

I am pleased to see that someone here has the penetrating, analytical acumen to perceive that your humble Captain is indeed a man of formidable intelligence, incontrovertible depth of perception, and, although he walks with Kings he has not lost the common touch, a man of parts who realizes what subject matter will interest the denizens of the Doors. A glass of wine a book of verse and piece of skin is all that the simple folk here crave.

I thank you good habs, for your kind words. You are indeed, a scholar and a gentleman

[lodwick]

V-Day?

G*d help us all.

[lodwick]

[Sundog]

One of the cutest pictures I ever saw was the Olympic torch on the way to SLC for last year's Olympic competition being carried by a swimmer from one end of that pool to the other. They had cleared all the lane ropes that go across (as you see above the white stripes) and this fellow was coming through the steam with the torch held high. The pool measures 100 feet wide by 800 feet long. (Lodge rates include free swimming.)

Next to it are steamy vapor caves where you sit on benches deep underground, and splash in cold water whenever you get too hot. Last year we were there during a blizzard and the snow was blowing down and into the the caves through the vent shafts.

I highly recommend Glenwood Springs. Canyonlands is a couple of hours drive further west and Aspen is an hour east.

[acnielsen guy]

Just a cautionary pictorial tale Kathy, watch your diet or size 28 will sneak up on you.

[lodwick]

Thanks for those two links - I had a great time checking them out and dreaming.

Beautiful resorts in wonderous country.

[lodwick]

Dang AC - but it's true. The older we get, the more we gotta watch it.

A friend has what he calls the six-pound rule: women gain six pounds during each year of marriage and after ten years or so the husband wakes up one morning and screams, "Who the heck is in my bed?"

[grannie9]

Subject: Trauma

What with all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died peacefully at age 93.

The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left foot in... and then the trouble started.

[lodwick]

LOL - nice.