Word For The Day, Wednesday 11/20/02

11/20/02 | Mistress Bella

[xsmommy]

i was thrilled by Shedd's confirmation, truthy!

[Bella_Bru]

Grimmy, Rika and I are terrible sorry that we were lame enough to forget to add you to the student list!

[TheGrimReaper]

I am at the publik skule today. Forgive me if I seem not to be paying attention at times. Much buffoonery to deal with.

[doubled]

The yule display coruscated
But look! Something was deflated
Ivy's not on the roof
Nary a hide nor hoof
How could a reindeer be so hated?

[TheGrimReaper]

All is forgiven. I assume that WFTD membership is forever?

[xsmommy]

Tysons is where i spend all my $$ doubled. I will tell you that the anti-Christmas spirit there doesn't surprise me. A friend of mine and i would always take our kids to the breakfast with Santa that Nordstrom would have. Then that mutated into Breakfast with Frosty, because of PC concerns. Then over time the Christmas decorations got sparser and sparser. My friend asked at Nordstrom what was up with that, and was told that the ARAB community had objected. Well we stopped going that year, and i don't think they have any sort of holiday breakfast for kids at Nordstrom anymore.

[doubled]

I thought ChorusGate was the scandal that was covered up when Clintoon got into the Rockettes dressing room.

[xsmommy]

would you please stop teaching HS students how to be buffoons, grimmy!

[Bella_Bru]

There is no leaving the family. ;-)

[Bella_Bru]

How's life with xspup?

[xsmommy]

oh he is ok i guess. he was problematic last evening, had been shut up in the house too much lately i guess. he is looking forward to taking a big bite out of CJ tonight, though! i am sure CJ will be looking for legal representation as he seeks to sue me for his dismemberment....

[camle]

I want to tell you all a story 'bout a xsmommy’s little pup
Who was a little doggie who decided it was time to grow up
xsmommy came home one afternoon and didn't even stop to play
She said, "come with me xspuppy there’s a man who wants to help you spray"

The man said, "xspuppy, you're growing your penis way too long
It's reported you've been drinking and a-runnin' 'round with girls and flashing dong
And we don't believe you ought to be hanging out your little parts this way"
It was time that you got yer little xsmanhood lopped away.

Well, it happened that the vetrena’n was gonna snip that very afternoon
They were sure surprised when xsmommy brought her little pooch into the room
And as she walked up to the table, I still recall the words she had to say
She said, "I'd like to castrate this puppy so he won’t wanna go out and play"

Well, there's xspuppy sittin' there and seven times he's tried to get a date
xspuppy sure going to need a lot of ice whenever he's away
And xshubby, can you tell us why your wife and puppy had to have this done?
And shouldn't xspuppy be told to keep his bushy tail all pulled completely down?

No I wouldn't put you on because it really did, it happened just this way
When xsmommy socked it to her xspuppy’s little thang
When xsmommy socked it to her xspuppy’s little thang

[doubled]

"Tysons is where i spend all my $$ doubled."

If they let you spend twice as much I can see why you go there.

Oh, wait, I see, you were talking to me. Well, along the same mis-note try this:

(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The Chinaman!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That's the man's name.
George: That's who's name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi: That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.
Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don't want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And
then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)
Condi: Rice, here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should
send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese
food in the Middle East?

[VRWCmember]

My favorite line from the article you linked:

Judge Hasette's brave ruling is also notable for singling out the firm of Walter Umphrey, one of those lawyers who has been giving the profession a bad name. (emphasis added)

Isn't it a shame how a mere 95% of crummy attorneys give the rest of you a bad name!

[xsmommy]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkk! abbott and costello!!!

[xsmommy]

i snipped him on CJ's advice!!

[camle]

very good now, I LIKE it.

[xsmommy]

i don't disagree with you at all, Vast. there were no more than a handful in my law school class that i could even abide!

[camle]

and on who's advice did you snip CJ?

[white rose]

I am a happy camper this morning. Al Gore is back, and he seems to be more delightful than ever. I'm praying he gets the Democrat nomination, I really really do. Those debates he had with Bush were some of the most coruscating entertainment I believe I have ever seen, and I want an encore.