The GUILD 8-14-2002 Funny Ladies

[Iowa Granny]

My favorite Burnett character was Alice Ann, the girl in the big rocking chair.

[Iowa Granny]

I hesitate to mention this, because it will surely 'date' me as the oldest person on this thread,,,, but Marjorie Main, from the old Pa & Ma Kettle films was really a jewel.

And for outright hillarious,,, Lily Tomlin's early Laugh-in skits left you rolling on the floor.

[BigWaveBetty]

I'll try to find a picture of Alice Ann. Here's another favorite, Rita Rudner.

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels GOOD for 36 hours. - Rita Rudner

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. -- Rita Rudner

[lodwick]

Judy Tenuta



My mother always told me I wouldn't
amount to anything because I
procrastinate. I said 'Just wait.'




Have you ever dated someone because
you were too lazy to commit suicide.




This guy says, "I'm perfect for you, 'cause
I'm a cross between a macho man and a
sensitive man." I said, "Oh, a gay trucker?"




I'm half-Italian and half-Polish. So I'm
always putting a hit out on myself.




Friends are just enemies who
don't have enough guts to kill you.




I got an "A" in philosophy because I
proved that my professor didn't exist.




What ever happened to the kind of love
leech that lived in his car and dropped by
once a month to throw up and use your shower?
Now all these pigs want is a commitment.




Dr. Ruth came up to me and said, "Judy,
I'm a sex therapist." Yeah, well, I would be too
if I came up to everyone's belt buckle.

[Hillary's Lovely Legs]

Some like it Hot is one of my all time favorites, and voted the best comedy of all time by the Academy of Arts.

My friend's 12 year old son watched it with me one day and said " That movie was so good, that I forgot that it wasn't in color".

[lodwick]

Memorable Quotations:

"If the ocean was whiskey/ and I was a duck,/ I'd dive to the bottom/ and never come up." --as Lucy in THE WOMEN (1939).

"A lie's a lie, and dressed in white don't help it." --as Katie in MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS (1944).

"Can't fall down around here without landin' on the Hicks." --as Ma Kettle in THE EGG AND I (1947).

[BigWaveBetty]

I couldn't find Alice Ann. But here's Marjorie Main. Now this did make me feel young ;-) but I bet Mr.B knows who she is.

Memorable Quotations:
"If the ocean was whiskey/ and I was a duck,/ I'd dive to the bottom/ and never come up." --as Lucy in THE WOMEN (1939).

"A lie's a lie, and dressed in white don't help it." --as Katie in MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS (1944).

"Can't fall down around here without landin' on the Hicks." --as Ma Kettle in THE EGG AND I (1947).

[BigWaveBetty]

Whoops, shoulda refreshed! Sorry. :-)

[lodwick]

[lodwick]

LOL - great minds and google. ;-)

[Iowa Granny]

Great finds!

Gotta get my day started. I've been sitting here playing and waking up for 2 hrs. I'll never be more awake than I am now.

I'll check back in when I need to rest my back.

[lodwick]

Same here - a move should be made - sometime soon.

If Carol Channing didn't exist, nobody would have made her up. This singing, dancing, large-mouthed dynamo is one of America's biggest stars and--even though she is quite talented--it's hard to say exactly what the appeal is. Her face and voice are instantly recognized from Maine to Alaska, yet in her long career, she has starred in only five movies and one of them--the gangsters 'n' LSD comedy "Skidoo"--is sometimes cited as the worst movie ever made!

[Hillary's Lovely Legs]

If you never saw The Women, you are really missing out on a great movie. There are no men in it, but it's all about men.

[Hillary's Lovely Legs]

Eve Arden..." Our Miss Brooks"

[Iowa Granny]

I know I told you I was going to get out of this chair and get my butt to work,,, but this just came into my mailbox and it is just too good not to share.


file:///C:/WINDOWS/TEMP/Who%20is%20the%20Rhodes%20Scholar.jpg

I don't know how to get these photos on the screen, if someone else knows how, and has time,,, it would be great. If not, please take time to click on this,,, it is a real riot!

Rhodes Scholar, yea,, right!

[lodwick]

Can you forward your mail to HLL, or someone else who has a web hosting service?

We cannot make it out from your temp file. Thanks. JL

[lodwick]

Nice - Miss Arden had slipped my mind.
Not much of a trick these days. ;-)

[Aggie Mama]

What about Katherine Hepburn in "Woman of the Year"?

[Teacup]

Good morning all. Lots of really funny ladies on this thread. Gotta step out today. I promised the boys I'd take them to a movie. It's been awfully hot out here, and Mr. "T" is gone. To hot for the boys to be outside all day and they drive me nuts if they stay inside all day. Last night the boys slept with their Bee Bee guns under their beds. You know, they have to protect grandma when grandpa is away, LOL. They are so cute.

[lodwick]