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I thought that you might possibly give me your undivided attention for a few moments here to the indisputable fact that the English language is beginning to be too grossly complicated, to the degree that it is virtually impossible for one to communicate a simple concept without having to resort to the use of long, complex, and sometimes totally needless and redundant thoughts that convey not all at what one intends to say, but, indeed, as a matter of fact, leaves the poor reader with a total sense of befuddlement and confusion that not only befuddles one’s mind and creates a rush to the medicine cabinet for appropriate medication(s), but even possibly causes one to give up entirely the effort at communicating with one’s fellow creatures and, finally, resulting in perhaps the total loss of Western civilization. At least, you may be absolutely assured that I would never resort to such behaviors as I am a firm believer, and always have been since the days of my youth, in simple, direct, to-the-point, non-redundant sentences that immediately convey to the reader my thoughts and, thus, for several reasons I choose to not get into at this time, for the sake of brevity, and to not prolong this brief note, I wanted to convey a brief example to you how the legal profession has so greatly messed up our most beautiful language, e.g.,

The King James version of the Bible is a model of simple style. “Give us this day our daily bread.” A sentence of only seven words, all but one of one syllable.

A lawyer would take the above line and say: “We respectfully petition, request and entreat that due and adequate provision be made, this day and date first above inscribed, for the satisfying of petitioners’ nutritional requirements and for the organizing of such methods of allocation and distribution as may be deemed necessary and proper to assure the reception by and for said petitioners of such quantity of cereal products (hereinafter called ‘bread’) as shall, in the judgment of the aforesaid petitioners constitute a sufficient…..”

Lord Nelson said, “England expects every man to do his duty!”

Nelson’s attorney rewrote the statement, to wit: “England anticipates that, as regards to the current national emergency, personnel will face up to the issues and exercise appropriately the functions allocated to their respective occupational groups.”