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I had a psychological experience this afternoon
''A Course in Miracles'' in based on idea that we are all asleep and dreaming
so that if someone does something we don't like
it is projection of the ego
(part of our mind finds it unacceptable that we would act like this, so we project it onto someone else)
displace it onto them
we see him doing it, not us
because the book was written in logic, I believed it, and because I wanted to right my marriage, I wanted to believe it
I wanted way to let my husband off hook after tumultuous period

I tried my best to act as if what book said was true
which kept me away from temptation to fight
but of course it never felt real to me

today when Bill got upset when I told him the unsympathetic thing new neighbor said bout cat family
(that we should call humane society and let them capture the cats)
Bill got scared new neighbor would call animal control on the cat family

at first I thought Bill is really nutty
why would new neighbor do mean thing like that
I started to get upset that I have nutty husband
then all of a sudden I actually saw what my book said
I thought suppose I do have nutty part of my mind that I won't admit is me
and instead project it onto Bill

it seemed weird I'd be nut like that
but I could see how I'd never admit to bein' nut like that

and all of a sudden I could see how I could have nutty side of me and not know about it
cause I always project it and see Bill as it

suddenly it just seemed easier to accept I have nutty side
it made me feel peaceful
and interesting thing is instant I accepted it was my nuttiness, he became so rational
I don't know what this means
but it encourages me and makes me hopeful
Love, Palo