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10 Worst Cars of the Millennium
Car talk ^ | 04/18/02 | Click & Clack the Tappit Brothers

Posted on 04/18/2002 2:44:38 PM PDT by yankeedame

What's the Worst Car of the Millennium?

The motoring public has spoken!(with actually comments by those casting their vote).

And...the winner is...

Well, you'll just have to check for yourself!

And, if you ever owned one of thse top ten heaps of the millennium, please accept our humble condolences.

10th Place: The VW Bus

"If everyone had to own one of these as a first car as I did, there would be no traffic jams anywhere. At least half of us would be so turned off by the experience of owning a car, that we would seek alternate means of transporation."

"There was no heat-- unless, that is, the auxillary gas heater caught on fire."

"The bus had no heat, blew over in the wind and used the driver's legs as its first line of defense in an accident."

"It was a death trap on the highway- you could never go fast enough. The chances were good that you'd be hit from the rear."

9th Place: Renault Dauphine

"Truly unemcumbered by the engineering process."

At the time, it cost about half the price of a Volkswagen...which was half the price of everything else. How could Renault do this? Simple. It had half as many parts."

"This car topped out at 45 mph. Since the minimum speed on the Florida Turnpike is 40, patrol cars would follow me, waiting for me to hit a hill so they could ticket me."

"From a historical perspective, it's a shame that the French spent their Marshall Plan dollars on automaking."

"A side impact by a bicycle totalled my Dauphine after only one year."

8th Place: Cadillac Cimarron

"GM thoght they could take a Chevy Cavalier, slap some Cadillac stuff on it, add an extra $5,000.00 and sell a bundle. Tragicaly enought, they pulled it off- for a while."

"Hands down, worst car for the money spent. Yugos were junk, but at least they were cheap. This heap had Caddy price tag!"

7th Place: Dodge Aspen/ Plymouth Volare

"This car began to rust while it was still in the showroom."

"After the floor boards rusted out the rear, they would fill up with water and freeze. I ended up putting soda crates on the floor in the back to keep people from falling under the car."

"The only useful purpose this car served was as the model for the car used in National Lampoon's Vacation"

"Owning a Volare was total ego death- the theme song, the vinal Landau roof, the inability to pass another car on the highway."

6th Place: Renault LeCar

"I'm convinced that the body for this car was supplied by Reynold's Aluminum."

"Our LeCar couldn't climb a hill fully loaded, so the passengers had to get out and walk up."

"I left it unlocked, and it was finally stolen. The insurance check paid for a textbook."

5th Place: Chevy Chevette

"An engine surrounded by 4 pieces of dry wall!"

"Plywood floor, printed circuit 'wiring', and no redeeming qualities. It was a 'Saturdy Night Special' from the word go."

"If I got on the Interstate without being run over, the car would creep towards 55. About an hour later, I'd reach it. Then, the shaking would begin."

4th Place: AMC Gremlin

"It was entirely possible to read a Russian novel during the pause between stepping on the gas and feeling any semblance of forward motion."

"The car had all the quality and safety of a cheap gardentractor."

3rd Place: Ford Pinto

"Dad had a baby-poop-orange pinto the year that car thieves hit our street. Although a dozen cars were stolen in one night, ours was there the next morning, on a strangely empty block."

"Remember that great Pinto bumper sticker,'Hit Me and We Blow Up Together'?"

"The car would do 75mph in 2nd gear, shaking apart and sounding like a bat out of hell. In fourth gear, the top speed was 70mph. What's wrong with this picture? You do the math."

2nd Place: Chevy Vega

"When the read end went on my Vega, the Chevy dealer accused me of racing it. Racing who? My grandfather in hs wheelchair?"

"Burned so much oil, it was single handedly responsible for the formation of OPEC."

"My Chevy Vega actualy broke in half going over railroad tracks. The whole rear end came around slightly to the front, sort of like a dog wagging its tail."

And the winner of the worst car of the millennium is...

THE YUGO

"I once tested a Yugo, during which the radio fell out, the gear shift knob came off in my hand, and I saw daylight through the strip around the windshield"

"Any time we made a right hand turn, we all had to lean to the right to prevent the drver's side rear tire from scraping against the wheel well."

"The Yugo's first stop after the showroom was he service departmnt:'Fill 'er up and replace the engine!' "


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KEYWORDS: autoshop
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To: arthurus
,,, DAF still make pretty good heavy trucks too. Rubber belts, as you mentioned weren't much of a problem if the cars were kept in Holland as it's totally flat there with such little stress for any engine. The cold winters meant a higher level of preventative maintenance on those belts though.
61 posted on 04/18/2002 3:38:42 PM PDT by shaggy eel
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To: yankeedame
Now that was funny. I laughed so hard I wet myself.
62 posted on 04/18/2002 3:39:57 PM PDT by patton
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To: yankeedame
Why do you have to cover a whole millennium? What cars were in production in the 12th or 15th or 18th centuries?
63 posted on 04/18/2002 3:40:03 PM PDT by shekkian
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To: shaggy eel
I saw and DROVE them elsewhere... (Holland)
BTW, go Hurricanes!
64 posted on 04/18/2002 3:40:29 PM PDT by CTO XYEB
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To: Malcolm
That's why they call it an escort. If you're driving it you better escort bring with you to push it when it breaks down.
65 posted on 04/18/2002 3:40:52 PM PDT by Bogey78O
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To: gridlock
Had a 1973 Orange VW Camper in College, took it cross
country, actually beat out a Dodge Ram pickup with a diesel
up a hill. It would top out at 85 and run that
all day long.
Called it the Lost in the Ozone.
It's now a flower planter at my place on the cape.
66 posted on 04/18/2002 3:42:32 PM PDT by ozone1
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To: shaggy eel
A collector of what?
67 posted on 04/18/2002 3:43:25 PM PDT by Warren
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To: GTXfan
But the boost was over 25psi...

Betcha he got real good at putting head gaskets in it!

68 posted on 04/18/2002 3:44:16 PM PDT by Fresh Wind
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To: Grampa Dave
Actually 70K is not that much mileage for the true diesels. I've seen quite a few with 200 K and still running.

The "true" diesels were a different animal. When you take a gas engine with a crankshaft designed for 8:1 compression, and jack it up to around 22:1, bad things happen.

69 posted on 04/18/2002 3:44:23 PM PDT by tacticalogic
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To: yankeedame
Back in the late 60s my brother bought a Simca. I think it was a French car or something. We had to push down the hill next to our house just to get the engine to turn over.
70 posted on 04/18/2002 3:45:50 PM PDT by GSWarrior
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To: Francohio
Yugo plans to start selling cars in north America in 2003.


71 posted on 04/18/2002 3:46:35 PM PDT by ZaDomSpremni
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To: Warren
A collector of what?

Comments that waste bandwidth.

72 posted on 04/18/2002 3:47:36 PM PDT by shaggy eel
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To: yankeedame
I had a '78 B210 "Honeybee" when I was in college. Took two quarts of oil a week and I still have scars on my feet from the pebbles that flew up through the rusted out floorboards.
73 posted on 04/18/2002 3:48:23 PM PDT by buccaneer81
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To: yankeedame
har! I did own a Renault Dauphne. I became quite skilled at replacing the motor. After unhooking everything, I'd roll a child's wagon under the car. Remove the mounting bolts and drop it down. Then just lift the car up and over the motor. After 3 replacements I abandoned it near Santa Barbara right on old Highway 1. When I went by a few months later it was still sitting on the side of the road.
74 posted on 04/18/2002 3:50:27 PM PDT by Republicus2001
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To: yankeedame
11) The Ford Probe.

This wonderful waste of tin features a roof line coutour that scientifically determines wind direction and then uses the wind in conjunction with the vaccum created in the interior by opening the door to dump several handfulls of snow right in the center of the drivers seat with astonishing accuracy.

During warmer months, this feature also serves to channel rain from the front of rhe vehicle down the drivers door panel and onto his lag.

75 posted on 04/18/2002 3:50:51 PM PDT by Jhoffa_
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To: yankeedame
My vote goes to the '91 Buick Century Custom. This is car had nothing custom about it. The owners manual should have had a disclaimer which said, "What do you want? This isn't Burger King."

Worst Radio, Front seat backs that were non-adjustable, Power windows which took a minute to go up or down, A really weird toggling headlight switch, Sparks which flew out from under the dash when the emergency brake was released, No trip odometer, No temperature gauge, Ergonomics which had to have been designed in Russia, Body styling inside and out that was 20 years behind its time, Access to the battery which required unbolting a front fender support, Peeling paint and door moulding that was glued on and kept ungluing.

But it gave some USA union goon a few hours wages......

76 posted on 04/18/2002 3:51:20 PM PDT by CWRWinger
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To: aomagrat
How about a new 1976 Pontiac 2 Door Coupe. That piece of manure was in the shop more than on the road and finally I had enough of buying more oil than gas as it got something like 9 MPG and 5 miles per quart of oil. It was not a good idea to drive behind the car, but it did add a coating of oil to the highway. I sold it to some innocent college kids and still feel bad I did them a bad deed. Caveat emptor, or something like that!

My first real car was a used 1941 Buick rag top, a girl-attracting beauty, but the seller had packed the transmission with oil and sawdust so I wouldn't hear the gears that were worn down. The guy was a fellow worker and after he proved he was a thief, I avoided the jerk.

After the transmission was repaired, that car ran for years, no problem except the signatures of all the chicks who wrote their names on the inside of the top. My temp fiancee was not amused.

77 posted on 04/18/2002 3:51:40 PM PDT by Paulus Invictus
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To: EBUCK
I was wondering who would be the first to mention the Ford Fiesta or the Festiva. A frined of mine has one. He put a radio in it worth more than the car itself.
78 posted on 04/18/2002 3:51:48 PM PDT by Bogey78O
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To: yankeedame
I laughed all the way through that!

I remember my friend's father bought a brand new chevy Vega that we used to ride around partying in.
It fell apart so fast that his father sold it to him a year later for $1. LOL

79 posted on 04/18/2002 3:52:48 PM PDT by Jorge
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To: yankeedame
And, if you ever owned one of thse top ten heaps of the millennium, please accept our humble condolences.

10th Place: The VW Bus

"If everyone had to own one of these as a first car as I did, there would be no traffic jams anywhere. At least half of us would be so turned off by the experience of owning a car, that we would seek alternate means of transporation."

"There was no heat-- unless, that is, the auxillary gas heater caught on fire."

"The bus had no heat, blew over in the wind and used the driver's legs as its first line of defense in an accident."

"It was a death trap on the highway- you could never go fast enough. The chances were good that you'd be hit from the rear."

OK, I'm offended. I drove my parents VW Van in high school, and it was THE party bus. We could seriously transport an entire party anywhere. It was a little slow, but what's the hurry when the party is right inside your car? Got great mileage, and was cheap to fix. Yes, dumping the clutch trying to light up the tires will ruin the transmission or clutch or both, but that was true for my parents' other cars as well. The heater can be very easily modified to pump out more hot air than you would ever need. VW's rule!

80 posted on 04/18/2002 3:53:55 PM PDT by sixmil
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