Mirror, mirror on the wall
Do you have to tell it all?
Where do you get the glaring light
To make my clothes look just too tight?
I think I'm fine but I can see
you won't cooperate with me;
The way you let the shadows play
You'd think my hair was getting gray.
What's that, you say? A double chin?
No, that's the way the light comes in;
If you persist in peering so
You'll confiscate my facial glow,
And then if you're not hanging straight
You'll tell me next I'm gaining weight;
I'm really quite upset with you
For giving this distorted view;
I hate you being smug and wise ~
O, look what's happened to my thighs!
I warn you now, O mirrored wall,
Since we're not on speaking terms at all,
If I look like this in my new jeans,
You'll find yourself in smithereens!
Come out, come out, wherever you are.. You need a good slap upside the head... Of course it wouldn't hurt you much you hard-headed old poop..