[carton253]

Jen, this is me, Carton. Are you now going to pretend that you are not the president of the Smeagol fan club? I think you are in denial...

[Overtaxed]

Celeborn doesn't wear the pants in his own forest!

Will that do? :)

[JenB]

Attention, everyone. Carton is delusional. My friends at the Lothlorien mental clinic will be here soon to help. They would let the Mirkwood Elves do the job, but unfortunately those guys have a bad record of keeping people under guard. For now, just avoid irritating Carton - but if you must irritate her, remember that Smeagol dislikes the sun, so keep yourself somewhere near a door.