[JenB]

Right now, the hormones are the "let's rip off some poor innocent elf-basher's head". Better than the other kind, in some ways, since I know how to deal with those... but your idea isn't too bad, except there is the problem with finding such a person!

[HairOfTheDog]

except there is the problem with finding such a person!

Matchmaker matchmaker make me a match!
Find me a find, catch me a chatch!...

..."He's handsome! He's tall! (That is from side to side)
But he's a nice man, a good catch true?
True!
I hear he has a temper, he'll beat you every night!
But only when he's sober! - So you're alright!

(I just love Fiddler on the Roof!)