"How dare they dress like that!?!?"
"I'm not allowed to dress like that!"
"I could dress like that but... but..."
"I don't have the courage and self-confidence to dress like that and not care what others think..."
Posted on 03/28/2026 6:42:05 AM PDT by DoodleBob
Several years ago, I joined some friends on a trip to Mackinac Island, a place famous for its Victorian culture and ban on automobiles.
After bicycling around the island, we decided to splurge and have tea at The Grand Hotel, which is as polished as its name sounds. Before trooping in for tea, however, we stopped in a nearby restroom to exchange our sports clothes for something a little classier, for the hotel requires its patrons to dress up before entering its domain. Such a change was a bit of a bother, but in the long run, it made me value my experience far more. Because my outward appearance was more polished, my inward self could relax and savor both the food and my surroundings.
The good ol’ Grand Hotel isn’t alone in its dress standards anymore. Ruth’s Chris Steak House recently announced a new dress code for its patrons, posting the following on its website:
BUSINESS CASUAL – PROPER ATTIRE REQUIRED PLEASE.
Kindly remove all hats when entering the restaurant. Guests wearing ball caps are asked to dine in the bar/lounge.
The following attire is not permitted in our dining rooms:
Gym wear, pool attire, tank tops, clothing with offensive graphics or language, revealing clothing or exposed undergarments.
The famous steakhouse was mocked for these (rather minimal) standards by fellow restaurant chain Chili’s, which claimed that you only have to be dressed in order to enter their restaurant.
It’s an admittedly touché response … but does it really win Chili’s any points in the long run? Put differently, if money were no object, would we rather go to the trouble of dressing up to sit and enjoy the upscale Ruth’s Chris than go to Chili’s just so we can bum around in our shorts and t-shirts? Most would choose the former without question.
Some might consider this snobbery. The dress controversy between Chili’s and Ruth’s Chris, however, is really a microcosm of the larger culture war which has raged over of how we present ourselves to the world for years.
The viewpoint of Chili’s is the one toward which our society has been slouching for many years. “Come as you are,” they say, “we won’t judge!” Thus, what once was considered acceptable dinner attire – a nice dress for women and a sport coat for men – gradually morphed into jeans and a blouse, then booty shorts, crop tops, or sweatshirts and pajama pants.
Americans cling to such clothes, loving the comfort that they bring above all else. Yet at the same time, we also complain about how difficult it is to get ahead in the world and how hard it is to get others to respect us. What if the two are related? Might we see more success in our relationships, jobs, and other aspects of life if we didn’t cling so obstinately to the Chili’s dress code of “anything goes”?
Famed Hollywood costumer Edith Head would have said yes. In her book, “How to Dress for Success,” Head wrote, “No matter in which direction your strivings for success are pointed, what you wear and how you look can make the difference between moving steadily toward your goal or just rocking back and forth in the same spot.” In other words, if you want monotony and stagnation, keep choosing those casual, comfortable clothes when you go shopping, dine at restaurants, attend church, or even go to the office.
But those who want to move forward in life should consider a different tactic. Although it sounds a bit crass, Head encourages us to think of ourselves “as a product” that needs selling. And in order to sell that product, one must seriously consider how to improve it.
“The difference between ‘packaging’ you and a static product like a can of beans is considerable,” Head goes on to explain. “The beans are going only one place. You are going many places, and the way you look in each special situation, at different times of the day and on varied locations calls for a variety of looks, a number of moods and a diversified wardrobe.”
If we can control nothing else, we can always decide how we dress, Head says. “When you know what you want out of life—the areas of success you desire—then it is easy to dress ‘in character’ to create the most exciting, pleasing, attractive appearance for your audience.”
Yet so many of us do the exact opposite. What, after all, do our sweats, ripped jeans, and skimpy shorts and shirts say about us? Do they signal that we are a “product” that is clean, neat, alert, responsible, and quality material worthy of advancement … or do they signal that we are dumpy slobs, more interested in lazing through life and getting by with minimal effort?
It’s completely our own choice as to which of these options we’ll follow … but just remember, that choice may be the difference between a Ruth’s Chris or a Chili’s life.
And brown shoes with black or navy slacks! Ugh!
I remember back in the day in Tucson when you went to pinnacle Peak with a tie on, they would cut it off of you and staple it to the wall.
Speaking of The Painter.........
The Heils - Hate To Say I Told You So.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKXu_eL3IhE
Brown is considered acceptable with blue these days.
****
Black or maroon.
You don’t need a tie. Just a sport jacket and a button down. Sheesh.
A white sportcoat and a pink carnation.
"How dare they dress like that!?!?"
"I'm not allowed to dress like that!"
"I could dress like that but... but..."
"I don't have the courage and self-confidence to dress like that and not care what others think..."
yeah, jeans, shorts, tank tops.
The girl should have made him take his hat off and never gone out with him again if he didn’t or so much as whined about it, or the wimp maitre d should have done it instead of thanking Tony soprano
My fellow women let guys get away with being perpetual 17 year old boys. Women take on a lot of responsibility for making the world hospitable to perpetual 17 year old boys
Gen Zers were born late 90’s.
Gen Xers were born ‘65-’80, so that sounds like it might be you.
Well, we have guns in church. I have no problem with that! 😁
Dated a real Texas lady long ago. I took off my cover as we sat to dinner. She said you are more Texan then these counterfeit cowboys in this place even though you are not from here.
You must have looked dang sportin’. I love camel’s hair. My mom was an excellent seamstress. Years back when I was young of limb and shape I discovered a partial bolt of camel’s hair fabric she had bought to make my dad a suit. He died before she had a chance to do so. At this point that fabric had been in her closet for over 25 years. She had no idea I would be interested. Would I? You bet. She made me blazer, slacks, and a vest. Fully lined of course. They don’t fit me anymore but I can’t stand the idea of just hauling them to the thrift store.
It is not to gain respect but to show respect. If not for the person for the occasion.
You honestly believe they do that to “chase respect from others”? I fear you have been misinformed. Being gauche no matter what your economic status is not about chasing respect it is about jockeying for status based on appearance rather than merit. Peacocks are showy, loud, and quite beautiful. But they never will be as awe inspiring as an eagle.
Do you wish for a pencil thin mustache?
What a great movie!
Yes. I do and they do. Slay Kweens know their worth. Gots the nails and weaves to prove it.
“They don’t just happen to wear suits, they wear them intentionally to add legitimacy to what they’re doing. There’s a reason these people on television and in politics adopt such camouflage.”
Did you ever think it could be because there is a dress code for appearing at certain venues such as Congress?
I wasn't talking about respect for the sake of respect. I was talking about respect for how it can benefit one. Examples are a waitress who is more attentive or a cabbie who picks you up in lieu of someone else, etc. Well-dressed people are generally treated better by others.
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