My mother should have divorced my father a long , long time before she finally did once we were all grown up and married . She put up with far too much from the jerk and we kids ( 6 in all ) were all scarred to various degrees by his treatment of my Ma , his alcoholism and verbal abuse .
Yes. Some marriages are more damaging than divorce.
Kids hate Dads who are mean or disloyal to Mama. And they always know.
A household where the husband abuses his wife and kids is NOT a good environment to be in, and I don’t blame the wife for leaving. If he can’t control himself, that’s the only solution.
I have friends who grew up in homes like that and it definitely damages everyone involved.