Posted on 06/25/2025 6:10:25 PM PDT by BenLurkin
Fellow lifeguards and EMS responded to a call of a young woman who had been impaled by a roughly 6-foot-long umbrella at about 9:30 a.m. Wednesday at Asbury Park’s 3rd Avenue Beach, fire officials said.
“The umbrella went underneath her left shoulder and out the back,” Asbury Park Fire Chief Kevin Keddy told The Post.
“It was protruding by about a foot,” he added...
The victim, who was conscious and alert throughout the incident, was rushed to Jersey Shore University Medical Center in Neptune, Keddy said.
“When we dropped her off, she was conscious and alert and in good spirits — all things considered,” he added.
Injuries and deaths from umbrellas careening down beaches after they’ve been caught in the wind are not unheard of.
(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...
*GROAN*!
Was this an accident or a deliberate attack?
May have something to do with it.
Sounds like she’ll make a full recovery. Not what you’d want to have happen but there’s not much vital stuff in that area, which is why they say if you have to get shot, you want to get shot below the shoulder, through-and-through.
Holy parasols Batman!
Could be the work of the Penguin Robin
The umbrella poolside at my house grabs the breeze all the time. I lower it everytime I step away from it. People don’t realize how little wind is necessary to create a dangerous situation.
“in good spirits...”
I don’t actually believe anyone that has been impaled on anything can be said to be “in good spirits”.
In shock, perhaps.
You win the internets for today...
Very.
I just watched that episode! Fusilli Jerry!
How strong do the winds have to be to impale human flesh?
Greetings from Asbury Park!
I suspect she was chasing it as it was blowing away from her, dragging in the sand, and just as she caught up to it, it tipped and she ran into the bottom spiked point angled upward at her. The top of the umbrella would have been anchored in the sand.
She was probably wearing a t-shirt or a tank top and the cloth didn't offer any resistance to the spike. Her forward momentum tipped it up further until her weight impaled her on it.
Things like this, in a wider sense, happen all the time. They are called accidents, and are mostly unpredictable. Like glass falling out of a window and injuring someone it falls on.
One could of course suggest to wear a helmet and body armor at all times.
Give the demonratcommieblmantifaterrorscumfeminaziguanopathicpedophilegoatrapers a day or two and they will be creating a new Law against Assault Umbrellas...
Deport all beach umbrellas...
(Golf Clap)
Get a brain...
Hopefully she had an Umbrella Insurance Policy.
Thread Winner!
brains not required in these parts, obvious to most
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