[Lazamataz]

SABATAJ! lol

Maybe it took you a bit to get hooked, but hopefully you got hooked. I had a much stronger hook in the first write, but it really made zero sense to the rest of the story arc.

I think I have an idea: Tape a piece of crack to each copy. Hook the reader RIGHT in. 😁

[DoodleBob]

It’s not my story so forgive me, but you could cut out the section starting “Lockhart took the exit..” and go right to “After a brief trip to Washington, D.C….”

Mind you, 2/3 of the way thru Atlas Shrugged, I skipped 60 pages when I realized “Ayn, I get it…this guy (I think he was on a hobo on a train) is going to have a 2-hour speech on Objectivism. I slogged though six of these already; I can skip this one without losing the plot.”

YMMV.