Sometimes, people are so lost and scared that they lash out at what’s in front of them. Perhaps that’s what’s happened to your relatives.
Again, with great reservation, I offer you this “meme’ as a possible point of engagement. Maybe your scared relatives will stop directing toward you their fear camouflaged as right-wing anger, and will seek common ground.

I appreciate your comments. Not sure about who is shaking the jar. I suspect they would say it is Trump.