Posted on 01/03/2025 11:19:43 AM PST by Navy Patriot
U.S. — As the investigations continued into the deadly events of the new year, FBI agents were reportedly baffled that terrorist attacks could even occur as they had already imprisoned all of the January 6 attendees.
Despite hunting down and incarcerating everyone who was present at the U.S. Capitol on January 6, 2021, terrorist incidents still somehow happened in multiple cities, leaving federal investigators shocked and dismayed.
"We're at a loss as to how this could still be possible," said FBI spokesperson Special Agent Curt Schampers. "We totally thought we had eradicated all extremism and potential threats of domestic terrorism when we locked up all those grandmas and patriotic citizens over the last few years. You should have seen the looks on everyone's faces when they told us there was a terrorist attack in New Orleans. It doesn't make sense."
Though little is known about the motives of the perpetrator of the deadly attack in New Orleans, FBI sources confirmed that agents are working tirelessly to link the incident to President-elect Donald Trump in any way they can. "We won't rest until we get to the bottom of this," Agent Schampers said. "And when I say ‘get to the bottom of this,' I mean ‘fabricate enough evidence to make it seem like a Trump supporter did this.'"
At publishing time, insiders revealed that the FBI would spend the next two weeks rounding up any Jan 6 attendees who had been released from custody so they could send them back to prison.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
There are obviously more White Supremacist Radicals Who Are Literally Hitler to pick up. We’ll have to give the FIB more money, though.
Pedo Joe, The Official White Supremacist of the United States of America put them up to it. Still trying to keep the FBI busy and off Hunter’s butt.
I was waiting for this, and The Bee failed to disappoint.
;-)
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.