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My girlfriend and I are having a symbolic ‘wedding.’ She does not want to lose her health benefits — and I don’t want to lose my shirt. Is that wise?
Market Watch via Yahoo ^ | August 24, 2024 | Quentin Fottrell [advice columnist]

Posted on 08/26/2024 4:03:00 AM PDT by grundle

Dear Quentin,

My girlfriend and I don’t plan to get legally married nor married in the eyes of the church. We’re simply having a wedding to celebrate our love, but we are not signing any paperwork. I am concerned that my significant other would lose her state health insurance because she doesn’t work. To cut a long story short, I feel terrible that she’s utilizing a program for low-income people, but she has serious mental-health issues that are completely treatable but expensive. I make too much money for her to qualify for medical assistance if we marry, but not enough to absorb what I’ve calculated to be $35,000 a year in additional expenses.

We want kids eventually and I’m concerned that, given that I live in a state famous for treating men poorly in divorces, she’ll end up with at least half of everything I own despite the fact that I accumulated quite a bit in assets before we ever met. I’m also likely to accumulate quite a bit more in assets before we have a child, and it’s actually necessary or helpful that she stays home to care for said child. We agreed several years ago that it was best she stop working because she was in an extremely high-stress environment as a pharmacy tech that was exacerbating her mental-health issues.

(Excerpt) Read more at finance.yahoo.com ...


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
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1 posted on 08/26/2024 4:03:00 AM PDT by grundle
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To: grundle

Society has created many reasons for people to avoid marriage. Sad but true.


2 posted on 08/26/2024 4:09:15 AM PDT by ClearCase_guy (I think women should get out of women's sports before they get hurt.)
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To: grundle

Serious mental health issues?
Get a new girlfriend.


3 posted on 08/26/2024 4:11:06 AM PDT by Rightwing Conspiratr1 (homonews)
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To: grundle

One perspective...

https://comingintheclouds.org/christian-resources/family/marriage/no-marriage-license/


4 posted on 08/26/2024 4:11:47 AM PDT by Z28.310 (does not comply well with others)
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To: grundle

One of the stated strategies of the Communist movement is to destroy the nuclear family.


5 posted on 08/26/2024 4:12:20 AM PDT by Cold_Red_Steel
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To: Z28.310

The sex must be great if she has mental issues. Sounds pretty hot on the meter.


6 posted on 08/26/2024 4:14:17 AM PDT by DIRTYSECRET
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To: grundle

So many red flags hitting this clown in the face and he doesn’t see them. Marriage or not, as soon as she has his kid, his life is over. Run away!


7 posted on 08/26/2024 4:15:25 AM PDT by mikey_hates_everything
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To: Z28.310

...with which I completely agree


8 posted on 08/26/2024 4:16:51 AM PDT by Z28.310 (does not comply well with others)
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To: Rightwing Conspiratr1
"Get a new girlfriend."

And keep looking until you find one that you would be willing to risk it all for. Welcome to marriage.
9 posted on 08/26/2024 4:17:25 AM PDT by j_guru
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To: grundle

I doubt that they will be the first couple to make such a private choice. Any children may wonder why no wedding pictures? It was one of my family’s rituals, finding the very large, very heavy Scrapbook filled with old photos, where we kids could see ancient black and white photos of my parents looking young, slender and all dressed up at their wedding reception.


10 posted on 08/26/2024 4:18:02 AM PDT by lee martell
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To: grundle

A Pharmacy Tech position is too stressful for her; this clown thinks she’ll be able to handle children?


11 posted on 08/26/2024 4:18:50 AM PDT by LRoggy (Peter's Son's Business )
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To: Rightwing Conspiratr1

Makes me think of the “Crazy-Hot” scale. The crazier the gal is the hotter she is.


12 posted on 08/26/2024 4:18:57 AM PDT by RainMan ((Democrats ... making war against America since April 12, 1861))
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To: DIRTYSECRET

Her first AND middle names are Tiffany


13 posted on 08/26/2024 4:19:51 AM PDT by LRoggy (Peter's Son's Business )
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To: grundle

can somebody tell me the difference between this pretend marriage and all these men pretending to be women? i mean,fake is fake, right?


14 posted on 08/26/2024 4:23:29 AM PDT by camle (keep and open mind and someone will fill it full of something for you)
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To: ClearCase_guy
Society has created many reasons for people men to avoid marriage. Sad but true.

Regards,

15 posted on 08/26/2024 4:24:40 AM PDT by alexander_busek (Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.)
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To: DIRTYSECRET

The sex is worth all the trouble.. until it isn’t.


16 posted on 08/26/2024 4:25:17 AM PDT by ArtDodger
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To: Z28.310

Summary;
Five Reasons Why Christians Should Not Obtain
A State Marriage License

1. The definition of a “license” demands that we not obtain one to marry.
Black’s Law Dictionary defines “license” as, “The permission by competent authority to do an act which without such permission, would be illegal...

2. When you marry with a marriage license, you grant the State jurisdiction over your marriage.
When you marry with a marriage license, your marriage is a creature of the State. It is a corporation of the State! Therefore, they have jurisdiction over your marriage...

3. When you marry with a marriage license, you place yourself under a body of law which is immoral.
By obtaining a marriage license, you place yourself under the jurisdiction of Family Court which is governed by unbiblical and immoral laws. Under these laws, you can divorce for any reason. Often, the courts side with the spouse who is in rebellion to God...

4. The marriage license invades and removes God-given parental authority.
When you read the Bible, you see that God intended for children to have their father’s blessing regarding whom they married. Daughters were to be given in marriage by their fathers (Dt. 22:16; Ex. 22:17; I Cor. 7:38)...
...Historically, there was no requirement to obtain a marriage license in colonial America. When you read the laws of the colonies and then the states, you see only two requirements for marriage. First, you had to obtain your parents permission to marry, and second, you had to post public notice of the marriage 5-15 days before the ceremony.

5. When you marry with a marriage license, you are like a polygamist.
From the State’s point of view, when you marry with a marriage license, you are not just marrying your spouse, but you are also marrying the State. The most blatant declaration of this fact that I have ever found is a brochure entitled “With This Ring I Thee Wed.” It is found in county courthouses across Ohio where people go to obtain their marriage licenses. It is published by the Ohio State Bar Association. The opening paragraph under the subtitle “Marriage Vows” states, “Actually, when you repeat your marriage vows you enter into a legal contract. There are three parties to that contract. 1.You; 2. Your husband or wife, as the case may be; and 3. the State of Ohio.”

...excerpted for quick reading...


17 posted on 08/26/2024 4:25:44 AM PDT by Z28.310 (does not comply well with others)
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To: ClearCase_guy

No way should a man get married, it’s far too risky.

They could lose everything.

Just pay the baby momma child support if you want kids.


18 posted on 08/26/2024 4:27:05 AM PDT by packagingguy
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To: grundle

Checking this again I can’t help but notice he’s not looking for advice. He just announced what he’s doing. Also, he had her cut off her escape route (gainful employment) and made her dependent on him. He won’t make a “legal commitment” and he seems to have already concluded they will split when he said “she’ll end up with at least half of everything.”

He sounds like a manipulator.


19 posted on 08/26/2024 4:29:59 AM PDT by Cold_Red_Steel
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To: RainMan

I hope that is not your premise.

I think it is “the crazier a gal is the hotter she has to be to be datable.”


20 posted on 08/26/2024 4:30:10 AM PDT by anton
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