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Think Women Can't Do The Job? Here Are 12 Benefits Of Lady Secret Service Agents
The Bee ^ | July 16, 2024 | Staff

Posted on 07/17/2024 12:10:19 PM PDT by Navy Patriot

Female Secret Service agents have caught a lot of backhanded remarks as the country has reacted to the recent shooting of Donald Trump. Some people even seem to think having Lady Secret Service agents might not be the best idea in every situation. That's absolute hogwash!

We at the Babylon Bee understand the critical role female agents play in the Secret Service, so we've put together this listicle to help underline all of the special talents these ladies bring to the table:

1. They can hold up their little makeup mirror thingies to reflect the sun into the eyes of an assassin and blind him: He'll never see it coming.

2. They have no qualms about recklessly running over curbs or pedestrians while driving the getaway car: They'll do this during normal motorcades too, though, so it's a bit of a double-edged sword.

3. They have experience changing diapers: (Biden security detail only)

4. They'll always make sure that everyone is safe and that no one gets hurt by standing on a slightly inclined roof: Safety comes first!

5. They can do that cool move where the boy Secret Service agents lift them above their heads like cheerleaders to provide even more shielding to the president: Rah! Rah! Rah! ...

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Education; History
KEYWORDS: babylonbee
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I may have to rethink my confidence in the Secret Service.
1 posted on 07/17/2024 12:10:19 PM PDT by Navy Patriot
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To: Navy Patriot

Sorry to say , but the women protecting president trump should not be in the position they are now

It just shows how unqualified they are for the job


2 posted on 07/17/2024 12:13:19 PM PDT by forYourChildrenVote4Bush
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To: Navy Patriot

The Bee was mildly amusing at first. Their writers now are fkng hysterical.


3 posted on 07/17/2024 12:13:37 PM PDT by circlecity
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To: Navy Patriot

You mean after they couldn’t find who left cocaine in the White House, or just now?


4 posted on 07/17/2024 12:14:14 PM PDT by coloradan (They're not the mainstream media, they're the gaslight media. It's what they do. )
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To: Navy Patriot

13. Female SS agents can take out enemy mailboxes while backing a trailer.


5 posted on 07/17/2024 12:14:15 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: Navy Patriot

Don’t you just love the Bee?

Humor, truth, and a breath of fresh non-political-correctness.


6 posted on 07/17/2024 12:14:44 PM PDT by Jim W N (MAGA by restoring the Gospel of the Grace of Christ (Jude 3) and our Free Constitutional Republic!)
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To: Navy Patriot

They also make great shields for everything part of the body of their protectee from the chest down.


7 posted on 07/17/2024 12:15:53 PM PDT by alancarp (George Orwell was an optimist.)
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To: Navy Patriot

14. If the SS agents get lost during a high speed pursuit, the female agents aren’t afraid to stop and ask directions.


8 posted on 07/17/2024 12:16:13 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: Navy Patriot

15. Female SS agents can protect the Transportation Secretary without distracting him.


9 posted on 07/17/2024 12:17:26 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: Navy Patriot

They’ll always make sure that everyone is safe and that no one gets hurt by standing on a slightly inclined roof: Safety comes first! The roof was sloped. That is way different.


10 posted on 07/17/2024 12:17:47 PM PDT by pas
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To: Navy Patriot

Outraged flames in 5, 4, 3……


11 posted on 07/17/2024 12:19:25 PM PDT by mbarker12474
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To: Navy Patriot

16. A female sniper won’t hesitate to shoot the enemy if she’s told that the enemy shooter is “just a clump of cells”.


12 posted on 07/17/2024 12:20:34 PM PDT by Tell It Right (1 Thessalonians 5:21 -- Put everything to the test, hold fast to that which is true.)
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To: forYourChildrenVote4Bush

Wait! They can also pee like a man with secret service provided Shaft Supplormentor;-)


13 posted on 07/17/2024 12:23:38 PM PDT by Harpotoo (Being a socialist is a lot easier than having to WORK like the rest of US:-))
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To: circlecity

The Bee was mildly amusing at first. Their writers now are fkng hysterical.
= = =

They have to be, to keep ahead of the insanely developing ‘reality’.


14 posted on 07/17/2024 12:24:35 PM PDT by Scrambler Bob (Running Rampant, and not endorsing nonsense; My pronoun is EXIT. And I am generally full of /S)
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To: Navy Patriot

https://x.com/grandoldmemes/status/1812576914592113127?s=46&t=oXM3QUNDayEotvdo1W-zQA


15 posted on 07/17/2024 12:28:14 PM PDT by hardspunned (Former DC GOP globalist stooge)
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To: Navy Patriot

https://x.com/atensnut/status/1813192076051280151?s=46&t=oXM3QUNDayEotvdo1W-zQA


16 posted on 07/17/2024 12:29:26 PM PDT by hardspunned (Former DC GOP globalist stooge)
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To: Navy Patriot

Who was the team lead? One account of what happened at the hospital indicates it was one of the women. Inquiring minds want to know but I’m sure it is now a state secret. Trump knows. Will he tell?


17 posted on 07/17/2024 12:30:12 PM PDT by Sequoyah101 (The Government that got us in this mess is not the Government that can get us out of it.)
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To: Navy Patriot

I don’t have a problem with women secret service agents. I do have a problem when they are in the personal detail of a protected person and they are not tall enough to cover that protected person. That is ridiculous to have a secret service person who only comes up to chest level of the protected and leaves the head and neck open. I would say the same if the secret service person is a male and he is too short compared to his assigned person.


18 posted on 07/17/2024 12:32:39 PM PDT by Moorings
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To: Navy Patriot

Ouch!


19 posted on 07/17/2024 12:33:48 PM PDT by stevio (Fight until you die.)
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To: Sequoyah101

Trump will tell that whole team, “YOUR FIRED”


20 posted on 07/17/2024 12:33:54 PM PDT by Texas resident (Biden=Obama=Jarrett=Soros)
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