This seemed to get at the crox of things.
I was in a relationship with someone — a guy who was so gorgeous and stunning. I couldn’t believe my luck. We saw each other for about 18 months but he would flirt with girls and I didn’t like it.
‘Call that insecurity or a jealousy thing or whatever but I believe that wasn’t right. It didn’t make me feel good about myself.
‘I suggested breaking up. I really wanted him to fight for me and he didn’t. He bloody didn’t.
‘Afterwards, I was an emotional wreck. About a year after, he’d met someone else. On his Instagram he’d had a romantic dinner with her on a holiday. I thought, ‘How dare you meet somebody else and commit to them when you didn’t commit to me.’ It made me feel awful. I became a serial dater after him.
‘I’d go on so many dates it was shocking but I knew the feeling I had when I met him. You know, that fuzzy tummy?
‘You really fancy someone. You want to spend time with them. I knew that feeling existed, so I was chasing that. I’ve been on dates with so many men and I’ve never had that.’
What you are describing is “sexual market value”.
You always need to know exactly what yours is, and of course do what you can to improve it.
If you “date up” too high the result is inevitable—heart-break.