[Elsie]

They may play the happiness card: are you happy? Are you satisfied with your life?
Now, if you happen to answer in the negative, you may feel already guilty of not being and feeling like a smileyfaced pokemon.
But if you dig deeper and play the psychological reversal trick, the questions you get are the same questions you should ask.
Then the real fun begins.

[Elsie]

 

 

According to MormonISM...

 

Ancient Jews built submarines, floated from Israel to Mexico, got cursed by God with brown skin for drinking and dancing, became the mighty Aztec empire,  killed off all the white people and left a record of all these events written in Reformed-Egyptian on solid gold plates buried in upstate New York.

 

(From there, obviously, they were dug up by an illiterate farm boy, with the help of the angel of the guy who buried them, and translated with magic “seer stones”)

 

It’s all very straightforward. Certainly at least as inspiring an insight into the human condition as the Bible.