Well, you could take up BDSM and use it as a whipping post.
If you get those annoying, tiny gnats in your kitchen from exposed fruit just pour Mountain Dew half way full in a highball glass. In the morning they will all be in it, dead (citrus smell attracts, high sugar fluid sticks and drowns em).
Mineral spirits kills cat urine smell.
Silver polish removes many car paint scratches. Just keep working it.
Use “Frog lube paste” (for guns) on all of your tools, chisels, and cast metal surfaces (like your planer) to prevent rust. Just work it, polish it in with a rag. I discovered this on accident, but it even fights south Georgia humidity. Much better than wax or silicon.
Mix 1/3 turpentine, 1/3 boiled linseed oil, 1/3 pure tung oil. You now have the greatest wood finishing oil known to man. Resists water and oil, and wood glue wont stick to it. Looks beautiful. Slop it on with a rag, work it in the direction of the grain, wait a minute, then wipe off excess. Do three coats, minimum. Best on work benches. Smells like heaven.