Have you ever “tended” to a child and it kept crying? Babies don’t cease crying just because you pay attention to them. As a matter of fact, if you leap to your feet and pay attention to a baby every time it cries, you are training it to cry to get attention.
I am curious to know how old the “baby” was an infant? a toddler? Makes a difference.
Not trying to hijack this thread but......
I am curious to know how old the “baby” was an infant? a toddler? Makes a difference.
First, I need to state that I am not a psychologist and do not play one on TV. I am an engineer who was trained to be a good observer, analyst, and problem solver. My only training regarding children and parental relations is that my wife and I raised two great kids, who are now very successful adults.
At birth, children are already very smart. They have a basic instinct to cry when they are in discomfort. God and nature has provided them with a cry that goes right to the spine of their parents and elicits an immediate response to meet the child’s need. If a low level cry of discomfort does not do the trick; they learn that raising the bar, will do the trick.
As the child becomes more aware of the world around them, he quickly learns that the same behavior that gives him comfort can also now be used to fulfill their worldly desire and whims and to control the behavior of others, siblings and parents. Unchecked, this is now a problem in self-will running amuck.
The easiest solution is to train the child (still very smart) that the behavior that previously brought comfort and their fondest desires, can now also bring pain in some circumstances. They very quickly learn that crying (and other mock signals of their own distress), will be comforted in some circumstances or will be punished in others. Again, they’re smart and will modify their behavior to get comfort when needed but also avoid pain. The pain referred to here is a spank on the butt. Applied consistently, it works. But, it also needs to be followed immediately with parental acceptance and comfort.
Is there an alternative? Sure, you exasperate your two year old child with long discussions of the global socio-economic eschatological implication of their behavior, while they continue to raise the bar because they know better than you. You can try to distract you child with a more enticing thing than they are asking for. What can go wrong with that? Oh, how about asking them if they want a spanking? (In my kids’ case, the question never got asked because it was already too late.) How about counting? At best the kid continues until your done counting then stops, at worst he knows nothing is going to happen and continues anyway. The problem with all of these is that the child does not have to recognize any authority in their life other than themselves. The fact is that there will ALWAYS be some authority in their life and the sooner they learn it, the easier your life and their life will be. Spanking set my children free on the path to a fulfilling life.
I have been around babies all of my life, and I raised 4 children of my own, so I consider myself knowledgeable in this area.
Admittedly, I did not go to the link, so I don’t know whether or not the baby’s age was given, but I am assuming he was quite young since it says he cried for 30 minutes.
In a baby younger than 3 months it is important to respond very quickly. I know what you are saying regarding older babies, but their crying is not as piercing as a tiny infant’s. Regardless of how old the child is, one certainly does not allow the kid to disturb others in a restaurant.