They can’t get their crisis story straight, but they have the solution nailed down.
GIVE US YOUR MONEY, YOU SERFS!
...and give up your rights too, because THAT will surely stop the [ insert imminent made-up cause du jour ] from happening and save the [ insert grievance / oppressed / victim of the evil white man du jour ] from being aggrieved, oppressed, victims.
Every week, it's something different from these leftist assclowns.
Laugh in their faces and watch them rage.